Missing Princeton student

[Anonymous]

People might want to read the r/Princeton forum.

https://www.reddit.com/r/princeton/comments/13e5f9h/would_you_choose_princeton_again/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Perfectionistic kids who struggle in such a competitive environment. Little resilience, poor mental health after years of competing and being valued for external accomplishments.

Is this just guessing? Gross

The school attracts kids whose identity is primarily based on their academic achievements. It is hard to become a small fish in a big pond: get Bs or Cs, have to actually learn how to study, mke new friends, be poor among rich kids, figure oneself out at the age of 18, etc….

Hope he is safe!

Please don’t defend generalizations, guesses, and conjecture about a missing person’s state of mind and then add your last 4 words. Again, gross.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Perfectionistic kids who struggle in such a competitive environment. Little resilience, poor mental health after years of competing and being valued for external accomplishments.

Is this just guessing? Gross

The school attracts kids whose identity is primarily based on their academic achievements. It is hard to become a small fish in a big pond: get Bs or Cs, have to actually learn how to study, mke new friends, be poor among rich kids, figure oneself out at the age of 18, etc….

Hope he is safe!

This. We all have read the stats of the kids getting into the top 10 schools these days. Heck, even what is needed to get into UVA. We do not allow kids to fail and reinvent themselves during their teen years. They are expected to be perfect and do it all. No down time. No “hanging out” all weekend with friends or family. They must volunteer, research, play a sport, make an impact, get all As (no A-s!!). It is insane. This is the result.

Not my kids!

[Anonymous]

University of Pennsylvania has equal or worse suicide stories.

[Anonymous]

At one point it was so bad that even U Penn's head of counseling committed suicide.

[Anonymous]

MO attended Princeton and felt very out of place, incompetent and depressed there even though her brother was also there.

[Anonymous]

*per her own book

[Anonymous]

Freshman year is often tough on students, lot of emotional, social, financial and academic challenges to face.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Perfectionistic kids who struggle in such a competitive environment. Little resilience, poor mental health after years of competing and being valued for external accomplishments.

Is this just guessing? Gross

The school attracts kids whose identity is primarily based on their academic achievements. It is hard to become a small fish in a big pond: get Bs or Cs, have to actually learn how to study, mke new friends, be poor among rich kids, figure oneself out at the age of 18, etc….

Hope he is safe!

This. We all have read the stats of the kids getting into the top 10 schools these days. Heck, even what is needed to get into UVA. We do not allow kids to fail and reinvent themselves during their teen years. They are expected to be perfect and do it all. No down time. No “hanging out” all weekend with friends or family. They must volunteer, research, play a sport, make an impact, get all As (no A-s!!). It is insane. This is the result.

The young man who is missing graduated from high school in 2019 but is a current junior. Even assuming he took off a Covid year, he is taking a long time to graduate, and that’s not a typical Princeton experience. It’s quite possible that the university had been working with him for years to try and accommodate his needs. Some other schools might not have been so generous.

The amount of projection on these threads from people who want to feel better about not having attended a top school like Princeton or their kids not getting into a top school is bonkers.

So etching


Something is wrong with you if you want to blame this on jealousy. Seven, perhaps eight, suicides in 3 years indicates something is not right for at least some kids there. MIT made a raft of changes in the early 2000s when they had a similar issues, Princeton needs to do that.

Concern troll is going to concern troll. Elite schools attract kids who hold themselves to very high standards and place a lot of pressure on themselves. Princeton has excellent resources for students who may be struggling, whether academically or for other reasons.

Princeton offers free counseling and psychological support to students. Counselors are available 24/7. Free primary care as well.

Seven suicides in three years shows it’s not working.

Is there actual proof of seven suicides?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People might want to read the r/Princeton forum.

https://www.reddit.com/r/princeton/comments/13e5f9h/would_you_choose_princeton_again/

That was reassuring that most current and recent students are navigating the school successfully.

[Anonymous]

"Each year, approximately 24,000 college students attempt suicide while 1,100 attempts end up being fatal, making suicide the second-leading cause of death among U.S. college students"

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suicide_in_colleges_in_the_United_States

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Each year, approximately 24,000 college students attempt suicide while 1,100 attempts end up being fatal, making suicide the second-leading cause of death among U.S. college students"

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suicide_in_colleges_in_the_United_States

Most colleges do not track or report suicides. You wouldn't know anything for them. It is the ones that are forthcoming that get attention.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:MO attended Princeton and felt very out of place, incompetent and depressed there even though her brother was also there.

That was 40 years ago. Her older brother Craig, on the other hand, was extremely popular and by all accounts had a good experience. He sent his own daughter there.

I also think Obama played up the angle that she was from inner city Chicago and felt out of place at Princeton for political gain. She actually went to a magnet school in Chicago that turns away most applicants.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This side convo feels very gross on a thread discussing a missing student.

YES. thank you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Princeton has had 7 student suicide since 2022. I do hope they consider whether they need to make some culture changes. Suicides have not historically been an issue ar the school so it’s something unique to the current culture at the school.

Maybe it’s increase in Asian students and parental pressure vs preppy nepotism babies who are more confident in their futures and are less stressed and often less perfectionistic. Not meaning to be racist but different cultures.