Dating is hard post divorce...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to date women in the same phase of life. I’m a 48 yo divorced woman with one tween and I’d love a low-key relationship where we saw each other once a week. Later on if appropriate I’d be happy to go to sports games and do other kid stuff.

Yeah, but OP isn't going to be remotely attracted to you. Real talk.

DP here. Oh, please. I am 47. I am going out with a 29 year old this weekend. I have dated 27-47. It 100% depends on how attractive you are. However, I would likely not be attracted to OP. I date men without kids because I don't want to deal with someone else's custody schedule and I can date younger without any issue. I won't remarry ever.

I used to brag about the ages of the young guys I was dating too, when I was emotionally unavailable and still healing from my divorce. Bragging about the ages of the young men we date is so thirsty to me. We shame men for doing the same, and though I agree with you and found younger men easier to date, too- I’m grateful to be in a relationship with a peer. He’s 52 with one grown child, I’m 49 with three in high school. It’s really fun having the emotional part, not just the sex part, now that I’m ready.

OP. Date younger for sex. Date peers for relationships. Don’t get confused about that.

[Anonymous]

OP you owe it to this woman to have a simple talk about whether she wants to have children with a future partner. If yes, cut her loose. Be fair and don’t waste her precious time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Does she have her own kids?

If she doesn’t have kids, it’s not going to work with her. It’s very normal for 35 year old women to want someone they can spend a lot of time with and settle down with. She’ll also probably want her own kids.

A better option for you is a woman your age (mid 40s) who is an empty nester and has her own life.

It is pretty rare in this area for mid-40s people to be empty nester. Sure, it can happen but most mid-40s people I know (including me) still have kids and some still in elementary school. I am 47--my youngest kid is in fourth grade. Her dad is 51. This is pretty normal where I live. I don't know a single 40s empty nester. Not one.

I was an empty nester at 47. I had three kids and was 29 when my youngest was born. So we are out there but probably in the minority.

Dude, just date your own age. Enough with the 10 year younger 30 somethings. They are in a different stage in life. Divorced, never married, empty nester, doesn’t matter but just be honest and age appropriate. Mid 40s and up are still as attractive as 30 something and you’ll just have more in common.

The average maternal age in dmv was 27 yo , so there are plenty of empty nester 40s women and they are a statistical majority. It’s just this forum is probably a selection of higher income grad degree women who delay having kids till mid-late 30s.

Yeah and for Hispanics is age 22 and 3.86 kids per childbearing aged woman. Read the MoCo county report, has demographics.

Those are typically Hispanics who were not born in the US. I was born in the US and I know other girls I went to high school with who were also Hispanic and some Mexican-American relatives who don't even have kids in their '50s or 40s. I'm attractive petite skinny big old booty and I am just shy but educated

What does the size of your butt have to do with the topic you are responding to? Average maternal age in the DMV.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get needing 2 days to decompress from your kids. I agree you should date someone closer to your age, but it's not a great age for women from late 40's to early 50's because they're dealing with perimenopause and menopause, and all that entails. I don't think you should lead someone on who might want to pop out a kid before age 40. You sound like the kids you have are all you'll ever need.

How does a parent magically get two days to decompress from their kids?

They have to either check out of their marriage/ household, or divorce and carve up custody time.

Fascinating

This thread is about OP who is divorced. Try reading before commenting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to date women in the same phase of life. I’m a 48 yo divorced woman with one tween and I’d love a low-key relationship where we saw each other once a week. Later on if appropriate I’d be happy to go to sports games and do other kid stuff.

Yeah, but OP isn't going to be remotely attracted to you. Real talk.

DP here. Oh, please. I am 47. I am going out with a 29 year old this weekend. I have dated 27-47. It 100% depends on how attractive you are. However, I would likely not be attracted to OP. I date men without kids because I don't want to deal with someone else's custody schedule and I can date younger without any issue. I won't remarry ever.

I used to brag about the ages of the young guys I was dating too, when I was emotionally unavailable and still healing from my divorce. Bragging about the ages of the young men we date is so thirsty to me. We shame men for doing the same, and though I agree with you and found younger men easier to date, too- I’m grateful to be in a relationship with a peer. He’s 52 with one grown child, I’m 49 with three in high school. It’s really fun having the emotional part, not just the sex part, now that I’m ready.

OP. Date younger for sex. Date peers for relationships. Don’t get confused about that.

I’m a 50 year old dude and even if I could I wouldn’t hook up with anyone in their 20s. That’s basically my kids age and downright creepy, even for a women. Grow up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to date women in the same phase of life. I’m a 48 yo divorced woman with one tween and I’d love a low-key relationship where we saw each other once a week. Later on if appropriate I’d be happy to go to sports games and do other kid stuff.

Yeah, but OP isn't going to be remotely attracted to you. Real talk.

DP here. Oh, please. I am 47. I am going out with a 29 year old this weekend. I have dated 27-47. It 100% depends on how attractive you are. However, I would likely not be attracted to OP. I date men without kids because I don't want to deal with someone else's custody schedule and I can date younger without any issue. I won't remarry ever.

I used to brag about the ages of the young guys I was dating too, when I was emotionally unavailable and still healing from my divorce. Bragging about the ages of the young men we date is so thirsty to me. We shame men for doing the same, and though I agree with you and found younger men easier to date, too- I’m grateful to be in a relationship with a peer. He’s 52 with one grown child, I’m 49 with three in high school. It’s really fun having the emotional part, not just the sex part, now that I’m ready.

OP. Date younger for sex. Date peers for relationships. Don’t get confused about that.

I have been divorced for years and had a bad marriage. There was no “healing” to be done. You need to read better. I was directly responding to someone who was saying no one would want a late 40s woman. I was showing that was not the case.

I was not simply commenting about it.

No need to project your own experience into others.

Also, I have a male friend married to a woman 18 years younger. They’ve been married for more than 10 years and no unlike you I didn’t shame him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get needing 2 days to decompress from your kids. I agree you should date someone closer to your age, but it's not a great age for women from late 40's to early 50's because they're dealing with perimenopause and menopause, and all that entails. I don't think you should lead someone on who might want to pop out a kid before age 40. You sound like the kids you have are all you'll ever need.

How does a parent magically get two days to decompress from their kids?

They have to either check out of their marriage/ household, or divorce and carve up custody time.

Fascinating

He said he's divorced, so when the other parent has the kids, he's alone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm 44 and just a couple of months into my husband leaving suddenly. I do NOT want a serious boyfriend. But when the time is right, I'd like someone to have sex with and go to dinner with like once or twice a week. I don't want to be responsible for his life and expected to attend all his kids' events or whatnot, or vice versa. I don't want to get married again (I'd lose my alimony).

I don't know if this is realistic or not, but it's what I'm hoping for.

You'll hit menopause in 4 years and you'll not want anything

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get needing 2 days to decompress from your kids. I agree you should date someone closer to your age, but it's not a great age for women from late 40's to early 50's because they're dealing with perimenopause and menopause, and all that entails. I don't think you should lead someone on who might want to pop out a kid before age 40. You sound like the kids you have are all you'll ever need.

How does a parent magically get two days to decompress from their kids?

They have to either check out of their marriage/ household, or divorce and carve up custody time.

Fascinating

This thread is about OP who is divorced. Try reading before commenting.

He claims in writing that he *needs* two days a week with no kids and no dates. “To relax and unwind from the kids.”

Now I’m curious wtf he did when married and living with his own kids 24/7 and his Personal Decompression Days demand.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get needing 2 days to decompress from your kids. I agree you should date someone closer to your age, but it's not a great age for women from late 40's to early 50's because they're dealing with perimenopause and menopause, and all that entails. I don't think you should lead someone on who might want to pop out a kid before age 40. You sound like the kids you have are all you'll ever need.

How does a parent magically get two days to decompress from their kids?

They have to either check out of their marriage/ household, or divorce and carve up custody time.

Fascinating.


****


He said he's divorced, so when the other parent has the kids, he's alone.

We also know why he’s divorced.