Dating is hard post divorce...

[Anonymous]

I'm recently divorced (46 m) and I just started dating again. The woman I am seeing(35 ) is great and we have a lot on common. However she wants to spend time together way too often. I have teens (we have 50/50 custody) who are also athletes. So I'm busy with them. On the days I don't have them I want a least a couple of days alone. Since my divorce I have really been enjoying my alone time.

Now I wonder if I should just stay single...I don't know I just feel like at my age I just don't have that feeling where you love someone so much and you can't wait to see them. Life is complicated at this stage in life with teens, retirement planning, college savings, career, elderly parents etc...

I'm just ranting.

Is this what I should expect while dating as a divorced dad?

[Anonymous]

Either date another divorced mom or stay single. Women in their 30s who have never been married and don't have kids are the worst fit for divorced men in their 40s. And I don't know why these women keep dating these men. I have 2 friends who are divorced and both are dating women in their 30s and both are complaining that their gfs are moving too fast

[Anonymous]

You are not dating the right age or someone in the same stage of life.

I am 46f, divorced and have been divorced almost 5 years.

I don’t really have time to date. I have had younger men FBs—they last about 18 months to two years. I don’t have time for an actual relationship. I have accepted that. My kids are younger than yours but one is in activities every day.

Date someone in your same stage of life or find a FB.

[Anonymous]

Bring a divorced dad in your 40s you don't have that many options sadly. Its easier for women because younger men are more likely to not want anything serious.

[Anonymous]

You are not dating the right person. Find someone who understands custody and schedules.

[Anonymous]

Yeah, it sounds like you aren't really ready to date. You have fifty fifty custody and on top of that you want to have two days alone where you dont see a girlfriend? That's not going to work. She's stuck being without you when you have custody. Most girlfriends are going to want most of your custody time.

You could maybe find a super busy single mom who is busy too, but then the problem is you have to have the same non custody dates free.

[Anonymous]

I’m 43f divorced with kids. Dating a divorced dad in his 40s. I see him 2-3x every other week during my non custodial time. It’s not a ton of time, but it works for us! So I think finding someone with a similar lifestyle is best.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Bring a divorced dad in your 40s you don't have that many options sadly. Its easier for women because younger men are more likely to not want anything serious.

This

[Anonymous]

Does she have her own kids?

If she doesn’t have kids, it’s not going to work with her. It’s very normal for 35 year old women to want someone they can spend a lot of time with and settle down with. She’ll also probably want her own kids.

A better option for you is a woman your age (mid 40s) who is an empty nester and has her own life.

[Anonymous]

If she doesn’t have her own family you need to cut her loose.

[Anonymous]

Yeah it sounds like u maybe just want alone time, so maybe don’t date until you wanna spend your free time with someone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does she have her own kids?

If she doesn’t have kids, it’s not going to work with her. It’s very normal for 35 year old women to want someone they can spend a lot of time with and settle down with. She’ll also probably want her own kids.

A better option for you is a woman your age (mid 40s) who is an empty nester and has her own life.

I’m an empty nester 46 yo woman dating for LTR. I normally meet 50+ established men with grown up kids, or 40s slightly younger never married men who want someone more established than younger women but could still give them a family. For me to date a guy with young kids and see him every other week on non-custodial schedule is a hard pass. He would need to be really outstanding.
I think OP should try dating a divorced woman with kids and just synchronize the custody schedules in the end of the year when it’s usually reset.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does she have her own kids?

If she doesn’t have kids, it’s not going to work with her. It’s very normal for 35 year old women to want someone they can spend a lot of time with and settle down with. She’ll also probably want her own kids.

A better option for you is a woman your age (mid 40s) who is an empty nester and has her own life.

It is pretty rare in this area for mid-40s people to be empty nester. Sure, it can happen but most mid-40s people I know (including me) still have kids and some still in elementary school. I am 47--my youngest kid is in fourth grade. Her dad is 51. This is pretty normal where I live. I don't know a single 40s empty nester. Not one.

[Anonymous]

You need to date women in the same phase of life. I’m a 48 yo divorced woman with one tween and I’d love a low-key relationship where we saw each other once a week. Later on if appropriate I’d be happy to go to sports games and do other kid stuff.

[Anonymous]

You need to date women closer in age and experience. I can assure you that you will find what you want if the woman has kids or is closer in age to you.