Seeking Advice: Nanny Refuses to Drive Teen After Weed Incident

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why does your teen have a nanny? The nanny shouldn’t be responsible for driving your weed laden kid anywhere from now on

+1
The need for nanny-driver suggests teen kid is under 16. A little young for experimenting with weed with absolutely zero consequences, huh mom& dad?

[Anonymous]

She knows if they get pulled over and the drugs are founds your son will throw her right under the bus. It’s sad but she probably wants to quit but can’t afford it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you are going to fire your nanny over this, then you need to specify in the new chauffeur job ad that duties include driving around a druggie teen who might carry drugs in the car. Someone is probably willing to do this job for the right price, and that someone is probably not a woman because women generally have lower tolerance for risk. Are you open to hiring a man for the job of carting your kids around?

lots of judgements here you have no ideas the teens situation if he is a druggie or not. And some sexism sprinkled in there as well , wow

[Anonymous]

the "challenging situation" is with your son, not the nanny; you have a smart nanny

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why does your teen have a nanny? The nanny shouldn’t be responsible for driving your weed laden kid anywhere from now on

+1
The need for nanny-driver suggests teen kid is under 16. A little young for experimenting with weed with absolutely zero consequences, huh mom& dad?

Not going to get into politics that much but since vape stores have been selling delta 8 to teens all over the DC area teen use has sky rocketed so under 16 use is not unusual anymore which is unfortunate

[Anonymous]

Nanny is in the right. Go watch some episodes of cops. When they find drugs in the car, it's the driver's responsbility unless someone else owns up to it. Numerous times the driver gets hauled off because no one else in the car said it was theirs.

This applies when it's not on their person, like in a bag in the car or under the seat. Different story if it's in someone's pockets.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She knows if they get pulled over and the drugs are founds your son will throw her right under the bus. It’s sad but she probably wants to quit but can’t afford it.

This is what I was thinking. This little POS will never face consequences for his actions. I'd be so livid if I was this nanny getting treated like OP is treating her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I haven't read all the replies, but it seems like you are not getting much helpful advice, OP.

Personally, I would offer to reimburse nanny for consulting with a lawyer on what her responsibility would be if the child had weed in their possession while she was driving.

This will either reassure the nanny or she will dig in her heels, and either way you have your answer.

thanks this is helpful the rest is focused on the teen which is already handled

OP, there are so few times that teens can see immediate natural consequences without some serious future consequence. But you have such an opportunity- if you bring drugs into a car, non family adults will not want to drive you. The spirit of your entire question is to make your kid avoid reaping the natural consequences of his actions. This is why you are getting such blow back. I suspect you don’t even understand why your question seems odious to so many.

[Anonymous]

I don't understand the point of this post. If nanny won't drive your kid, and that is the bulk of her job, then you need to let her go. Given the circumstances, I'd give her two weeks notice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you are going to fire your nanny over this, then you need to specify in the new chauffeur job ad that duties include driving around a druggie teen who might carry drugs in the car. Someone is probably willing to do this job for the right price, and that someone is probably not a woman because women generally have lower tolerance for risk. Are you open to hiring a man for the job of carting your kids around?

Why not use the kid's dealer? He's driving around making deliveries anyway. And OP's kids can maybe get a cut. It's win win.

[Anonymous]

Is there a way you would handle this if you were driving him around instead? Are you making him take drug tests?

[Anonymous]

If the nanny is let go I hope she lets the parents of all the teen’s friends as well as his private school know what happened. She should also be filing for unemployment. The OP has created unsafe working conditions for her at no fault of her own. Hope this keeps Larlo out of Ivy League and the nanny isn’t harmed financially.

If this isn’t a troll post it makes me wonder how the drug use came to light to the family and the nanny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand the point of this post. If nanny won't drive your kid, and that is the bulk of her job, then you need to let her go. Given the circumstances, I'd give her two weeks notice.

Yeah, fire that crazy nanny for not wanting to subject herself to arrest due to the son's behavior! The audacity!

[Anonymous]

If OP ran a restaurant and a customer was sexually harrassing a waitress, OP would fire the waitress instead of banning the offending customer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If OP ran a restaurant and a customer was sexually harrassing a waitress, OP would fire the waitress instead of banning the offending customer.

Sadly this isn't uncommon. It happened to me when I was in college. My manager basically told me to suck it up because he was a regular who spent a lot of money. And I was too young and naive to do anything about it.