Sister in law bridal shower

[Anonymous]

So you don't want to go, have a conflict that excuses you, the bride doesn't want you there, and the hosts haven't invited you.

Why would you go?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you have finals the same day, then you have a pre-existing conflict that can’t be changed. Just graciously decline: “Wishing you all the best with this major life milestone! I’m sorry I won’t be able to attend, but I am with you in spirit.”

This. No one should miss college finals for a shower - even if you adore the person.

But if you are marrying your BF and she is marrying his brother, then you should always take the high road. Not going out of spite is not taking the high road.

You have no examples of how she was rude to you other than she didn’t talk. Maybe she is very shy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you have finals the same day, then you have a pre-existing conflict that can’t be changed. Just graciously decline: “Wishing you all the best with this major life milestone! I’m sorry I won’t be able to attend, but I am with you in spirit.”

This. No one should miss college finals for a shower - even if you adore the person.

But if you are marrying your BF and she is marrying his brother, then you should always take the high road. Not going out of spite is not taking the high road.

You have no examples of how she was rude to you other than she didn’t talk. Maybe she is very shy.

I’ve posted how she is rude on other comments. She isn’t shy at all. I’m the only person she never talks to at any family gathering. I’ve gone up to her personally and she acted like I didn’t exist. Like literally didn’t exist. I just talked and she sat there wouldn’t even look at me until I walked away. And then someone else came around and she started talking. It’s a constant thing and she glares at me from across the room especially if I’m talking to our mother in law. I can’t even just hang out with mother in law alone she has to tag along even though she gets time with her one-on-one but then she won’t even talk and be grumpy so they leave early. When we come over she will hug everyone and say hi I go up to her to say hi and give a hug and she walks away and doesn’t even say hi. She has been like that since I literally the day I met her. I’ve gone out of my way to try and she won’t. I text her for birthdays or special days, always make sure I show kindness. And she is still rude and doesn’t do the same I invite her to my child birthday among other things she doesn’t come. There’s more but that’s short version.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you have finals the same day, then you have a pre-existing conflict that can’t be changed. Just graciously decline: “Wishing you all the best with this major life milestone! I’m sorry I won’t be able to attend, but I am with you in spirit.”

This. No one should miss college finals for a shower - even if you adore the person.

But if you are marrying your BF and she is marrying his brother, then you should always take the high road. Not going out of spite is not taking the high road.

You have no examples of how she was rude to you other than she didn’t talk. Maybe she is very shy.

I want to say also that I try with her a lot. I’ve constantly taken the high road and it’s honestly just defeating sometimes :/

[Anonymous]

She doesn't like you. She's never going to be friendly. Being polite when you're forced to come face-to-face is taking the high road. You don't need to do more.

[Anonymous]

OP, how old are you?
Stop hugging people that don’t want to be touched.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, how old are you?
Stop hugging people that don’t want to be touched.

If she hugs everyone and doesn’t choose to hug one person it’s not about touch. I don’t mind not hugging people who don’t want to be touched.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, how old are you?
Stop hugging people that don’t want to be touched.

If she hugs everyone and doesn’t choose to hug one person it’s not about touch. I don’t mind not hugging people who don’t want to be touched.

She doesn't like you and doesn't want to hug her. You sound like you're obsessed with her. She's just not that into you, let it go.

[Anonymous]

Her family is also rude to you? Why do you truly think this is? Some sort of weird superiority because you’re unmarried with a child? If you asked your MIL what reason would she give? What does your boyfriend have to say about her rude behavior? Do you all share the same ethnicity/culture?

[Anonymous]

If you were not on the guest list and were not to know about the event, keep your head high and politely decline your MIL. I would still leave a small gift with your MIL to give for you at the shower.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I really don't understand the point of this post. Even if you loved your sister in law, you probably wouldn't be able to attend because of finals. So why are you being so dramatic and attention seeking? "sorry, I have finals and won't be able to make it.". Send a gift. Done.

This. No one pays college tuition, attends class and does the work all semester, but then skips the final and fails the class because they attended a party. Even if it were your best friend's party.

You aren't financially stable enough to get married but apparently the money you spend on this class isn't a big deal?

Come on. You just love the silly drama and to paint yourself as a victim. None of this was necessary. You have a final the same time as the shower. You can't go. The end.

Plus, is all this over something that is happening in April or May? It's January 5th, when are the soonest college finals? Have you even started your classes this semester to even know your finals dates yet?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I really don't understand the point of this post. Even if you loved your sister in law, you probably wouldn't be able to attend because of finals. So why are you being so dramatic and attention seeking? "sorry, I have finals and won't be able to make it.". Send a gift. Done.

This. No one pays college tuition, attends class and does the work all semester, but then skips the final and fails the class because they attended a party. Even if it were your best friend's party.

You aren't financially stable enough to get married but apparently the money you spend on this class isn't a big deal?

Come on. You just love the silly drama and to paint yourself as a victim. None of this was necessary. You have a final the same time as the shower. You can't go. The end.

Plus, is all this over something that is happening in April or May? It's January 5th, when are the soonest college finals? Have you even started your classes this semester to even know your finals dates yet?

No it’s happening soon actually, I do have my schedule for school because I am currently in school so I have all due dates that’s how I know. My point was I didn’t want her to feel like because of whatever reasons for not liking me she has that I was just being rude even though it’s draining dealing with it all the time. That’s why I said I’m still a person that feels guilty for not going. I do not love drama and I’m not playing victim. I don’t understand why people take a few things people say and feel like they know every single thing and can just judge or belittle people on the web. I already said what I meant about financial stability in a previous post. If that’s not something you’d do that’s totally fine but you don’t have to be rude to someone else because of it.