You are SO not invited to my bat mitzvah - movie on netflix

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband is Jewish and he rolled his eyes at the tremendous diversity in the Hebrew school scenes. While we understand and support representation in movies, it wasn’t realistic and to a certain extent co-opts what is a singular Jewish experience. (I’m Catholic so I don’t have a dog in this fight.)

He also pointed out that Jewish mothers spend a year+ planning the event (while the movie made it seem like they are thrown together, including shopping for the dress at the last minute).

I would have loved to see Sara Silverman or Seinfeld or another Jewish comedian make a cameo. Missed opportunity.

I was very distracted by this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am in the minority, but I couldn't get through it. I think I stopped with 40m left. Maybe I'll give it another chance and try to finish it up.

Same. I hated how entitled all the kids were. It wasn't for me.

[Anonymous]

I'm not Jewish but I watched it and thought it was a fantastic, relatable movie that showed excellent values. I told my teen daughter to watch it.

[Anonymous]

Are lavish Bat Mitzvas like this really the norm? What about lower middle class/working class Jews? What do they do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Seems like you'd have to try pretty hard to not know anyone Jewish.

Jews are only 2% of the country and tend to only live in specific regions. I never met anyone who was Jewish until I went to college (Virginia Tech), and even then I can only think of three that I knew for sure were Jewish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not Jewish but I watched it and thought it was a fantastic, relatable movie that showed excellent values. I told my teen daughter to watch it.

I couldn’t believe how realistic some of the cringy scenes were like the maxi pad that was floating in the water and the awful video full of embarrassing moments Stacey made as a prank on Lydia. I audibly gasped out loud during both scenes!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm not Jewish but I watched it and thought it was a fantastic, relatable movie that showed excellent values. I told my teen daughter to watch it.

I couldn’t believe how realistic some of the cringy scenes were like the maxi pad that was floating in the water and the awful video full of embarrassing moments Stacey made as a prank on Lydia. I audibly gasped out loud during both scenes!

I did too but did no one think to watch the video before it was shown? I can buy that it would be a surprise for Lydia but her mom didn’t watch? And her nutty dad didn’t storm the DJ booth and let it play?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Seems like you'd have to try pretty hard to not know anyone Jewish.

Jews are only 2% of the country and tend to only live in specific regions. I never met anyone who was Jewish until I went to college (Virginia Tech), and even then I can only think of three that I knew for sure were Jewish.

VT has an active Hillel.
https://www.hillelatvirginiatech.org/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm not Jewish but I watched it and thought it was a fantastic, relatable movie that showed excellent values. I told my teen daughter to watch it.

I couldn’t believe how realistic some of the cringy scenes were like the maxi pad that was floating in the water and the awful video full of embarrassing moments Stacey made as a prank on Lydia. I audibly gasped out loud during both scenes!

I did too but did no one think to watch the video before it was shown? I can buy that it would be a surprise for Lydia but her mom didn’t watch? And her nutty dad didn’t storm the DJ booth and let it play?

I thought the same thing, but the video does start out really sweet, with several slides from their childhood, so her mom probably only saw that and just sent it. But yes, I’m surprised Lydia’s dad didn’t stop it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband is Jewish and he rolled his eyes at the tremendous diversity in the Hebrew school scenes. While we understand and support representation in movies, it wasn’t realistic and to a certain extent co-opts what is a singular Jewish experience. (I’m Catholic so I don’t have a dog in this fight.)

He also pointed out that Jewish mothers spend a year+ planning the event (while the movie made it seem like they are thrown together, including shopping for the dress at the last minute).

I would have loved to see Sara Silverman or Seinfeld or another Jewish comedian make a cameo. Missed opportunity.

I was very distracted by this.

It's so sad that diversity throws off some posters. I love to see it in movies and it makes more people feel included.
We've watched it twice with groups of middle schoolers who could not get enough. Watching it the second time I caught more cute details that really cement this one as a quotable classic. I think it will be one they all watch several times.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are lavish Bat Mitzvas like this really the norm? What about lower middle class/working class Jews? What do they do?

It’s kind of like how lavish weddings are the norm in some circles and other people get married in the church and then have punch and cake in the church basement.

My kid went to b’nai mitzvahs which were huge and one where less than a dozen kids played ping pong in a rec room in the basement of the synagogue and the favor was bazooka joe gum from Israel so the comics were in Hebrew.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband is Jewish and he rolled his eyes at the tremendous diversity in the Hebrew school scenes. While we understand and support representation in movies, it wasn’t realistic and to a certain extent co-opts what is a singular Jewish experience. (I’m Catholic so I don’t have a dog in this fight.)

He also pointed out that Jewish mothers spend a year+ planning the event (while the movie made it seem like they are thrown together, including shopping for the dress at the last minute).

I would have loved to see Sara Silverman or Seinfeld or another Jewish comedian make a cameo. Missed opportunity.

I was very distracted by this.

It's so sad that diversity throws off some posters. I love to see it in movies and it makes more people feel included.
We've watched it twice with groups of middle schoolers who could not get enough. Watching it the second time I caught more cute details that really cement this one as a quotable classic. I think it will be one they all watch several times.

?

Diversity isn’t throwing off viewers.

Rather, actual Jewish people thought it was odd to see so much diversity at Hebrew school. The film centers around scenes at Hebrew school, which is a unique rite of passage for Jewish people.

Beyond being unrealistic—which is expected to a large degree with Hollywood films—it simply isn’t representative of *Jewish people* and their experience.

That’s legit criticism.

A few (adopted) Asian kids would have made sense. But black kids at Hebrew school? Latinos? Not a chance…especially in NJ.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband is Jewish and he rolled his eyes at the tremendous diversity in the Hebrew school scenes. While we understand and support representation in movies, it wasn’t realistic and to a certain extent co-opts what is a singular Jewish experience. (I’m Catholic so I don’t have a dog in this fight.)

He also pointed out that Jewish mothers spend a year+ planning the event (while the movie made it seem like they are thrown together, including shopping for the dress at the last minute).

I would have loved to see Sara Silverman or Seinfeld or another Jewish comedian make a cameo. Missed opportunity.

I was very distracted by this.

It's so sad that diversity throws off some posters. I love to see it in movies and it makes more people feel included.
We've watched it twice with groups of middle schoolers who could not get enough. Watching it the second time I caught more cute details that really cement this one as a quotable classic. I think it will be one they all watch several times.

?

Diversity isn’t throwing off viewers.

Rather, actual Jewish people thought it was odd to see so much diversity at Hebrew school. The film centers around scenes at Hebrew school, which is a unique rite of passage for Jewish people.

Beyond being unrealistic—which is expected to a large degree with Hollywood films—it simply isn’t representative of *Jewish people* and their experience.

That’s legit criticism.

A few (adopted) Asian kids would have made sense. But black kids at Hebrew school? Latinos? Not a chance…especially in NJ.

Jersey is such a melting pot. I bought it without any issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband is Jewish and he rolled his eyes at the tremendous diversity in the Hebrew school scenes. While we understand and support representation in movies, it wasn’t realistic and to a certain extent co-opts what is a singular Jewish experience. (I’m Catholic so I don’t have a dog in this fight.)

He also pointed out that Jewish mothers spend a year+ planning the event (while the movie made it seem like they are thrown together, including shopping for the dress at the last minute).

I would have loved to see Sara Silverman or Seinfeld or another Jewish comedian make a cameo. Missed opportunity.

I was very distracted by this.

It's so sad that diversity throws off some posters. I love to see it in movies and it makes more people feel included.
We've watched it twice with groups of middle schoolers who could not get enough. Watching it the second time I caught more cute details that really cement this one as a quotable classic. I think it will be one they all watch several times.

?

Diversity isn’t throwing off viewers.

Rather, actual Jewish people thought it was odd to see so much diversity at Hebrew school. The film centers around scenes at Hebrew school, which is a unique rite of passage for Jewish people.

Beyond being unrealistic—which is expected to a large degree with Hollywood films—it simply isn’t representative of *Jewish people* and their experience.

That’s legit criticism.

A few (adopted) Asian kids would have made sense. But black kids at Hebrew school? Latinos? Not a chance…especially in NJ.

Jersey is such a melting pot. I bought it without any issue.

+1, I went to Jewish Day school in the 00’s and we had half Black, Latino, and Asian kids. Nowhere near the number as this movie but it makes sense that the number would be higher today, especially at a Reform school in NJ. And what was the most accurate was that the diverse kids were definitely the cool, popular kids at our school.

[Anonymous]

Jewish person here. The diversity worked for me (NJ, as someone mentioned). My nephew is Guatemalan (adopted) and Jewish.

As to the movie, Sunny Sadler ("Stacy") is incredibly talented. Adam Sandler has a history of putting his friends and family into his projects, so I was prepared for nepo baby nonsense, but she has chops! Her older sister Sadie is only meh acting-wise, though it was sweet to see her interactions with her family. I can see Sunny going far in the industry.

I had to FF through the cringiest parts. I don't like seeing people being mean to one another, and I actually don't believe Lydia would have forgiven Stacy so quickly.

Overall, a solid 7/10.