Your kids should get premarital assets/build on your own before marriage. There should be plenty for them already if you are that wealthy, particular if they are out of college and employed. I'm living my child $5mm+ assets. You would get a partner sightly younger to spend your elderly years with, travel and enjoy all benefits of very high joint income together. Or you can casually date and then die alone helped by an Asian nurse, scared for your income and assets. Your kids will get $10mm instead of $5mm. It's a matter of individual choice. I'm fine on my 400K/year, but I lived in a marriage with spouse making about same, and lifestyle you get for 800K joint income is not comparable. Not sure how it's not obvious. I don't want to be single in my elderly years, or have a partner who enjoys the benefits of joint income but leaves everything we earned together to his kids. In fact, it's agains the law: you can't leave out your spouse from marital assets |
Hi. Not all geriatric nurses are Asian. Do you have any more racist stereotypes you need help with? |
Fixed that for you. |
I'm a high earning woman and I think you're wrong here about what is best for YOU. You're much better off just keeping your money separate and sharing only living expenses if you move in with a partner. You don't want to get yourself financially tangled up with an older man. If things don't work out for any number of reasons, you don't want to make it hard for yourself to leave. The only asset you might want to own jointly is a house, and that is fine, otherwise, just don't do it. Downside outweighs upside. |
In addition to being racist this poor woman doesn’t know much, in terms of actual facts. Anyone who views relationships as transactionally as this person does still needs one financially. |
I’m not entangling myself with older men. Only date around my own age, as it gives enough time to sync out careers, retirement and financial goals. 40s is new 30s, wheh people still have 20+ years of working career ahead of them. In fact, these are prime earning years. Why would I be with someone approaching 60s who’s scared to death of anything joint with a woman? I get absolutely nothing out such a relationship |
She's rich and charming. What a catch! |
It's not being "scared to death of anything joint with a woman" to point out that it has no benefit to the man and significant potential downside. |
![]() This board never fails to deliver. |
I don’t know how it can’t be a benefit to anybody in high COLA area to become nearly in 1 percentile HH income. And not sure what downsides are, if both spouses contribute equally. In fact, a younger female spouse would contribute more towards joint assets over time. You’d children wouldn’t be earning it: she and you would in second marriage. If you divorce either spouse gets 50%, same as if you weren’t married. But if you don’t divorce you get way cushier lifestyle in retirement and a partner Would love to hear more on downsides. |
Why would you do this? I guess if you must, you could move in together. What other joint assets do you need or want? Seems particularly pointless after a certain age, especially if you're never going to have kids together. The happiest silver couple I know dated but never officially moved in together, and when he got sick first, his kids took over in his care. They never comingled estates or anything and she had her own house. Remarriage after a certain age seems like it's significantly more trouble than it's worth. |
And she attaches dollar signs to everything, especially relationships. Control Freak. |
You, sir, win the Internet today! |
+1 |
SO what do you propose is the equitable thing to do in light of the fact that she will likely outlive him and he will receive her care in od age, while she will need the same but he will not be present to provide it? Keeping in mind that she also has children, and like you does not want their inheritance jeopardized by an unrelated third party? Would it be fair to put all pre-marital assets into separate trusts and then leave subsequently accrued marital assets to the surviving spouse? |