DH opposing 8yo DS having ears pierced
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Anonymous
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We wouldn’t allow any of our children to get piercing ears until 12. DS has never asked for them, but if he had, we would’ve said no. Now at 16, we would likely concede.
One thing we agree on, is that anything dealing with the kids must be a shared agreement. It will erode your marriage, and even your relationship with your kids, if you don’t put up a united front. |
Anonymous
This and it is not age-appropriate. Child is too young and is setting himself up to be hazed/teased at school. |
Anonymous
| Another dad here who would not allow my son to have his ears pierced. Do it as an adult. You live under my roof, so body mutilation. Cultural norms exist for a reason. |
Anonymous
The kid is 8, not 2! |
Anonymous
DP. It is low class and trashy. Especially at age 8. |
Anonymous
| I think in these situations the no vote wins. |
Anonymous
| Why are people opposed to genders being different on cosmetics? |
Anonymous
Agree. DH is a parent too. If one parent objects to an unalterable cosmetic change, like putting a hole ears, then that parent wins. |
Anonymous
A piercing really isn't a big deal. |
Anonymous
This. Even if the hole closes or no earrings are worn, there is still the visible mark, forever. Wait, OP. Marriage involves compromise and parenting is best united. |
Anonymous
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This is a situation where my values (who cares about gender norms . . . let people express themselves) and my biases (he'll draw negative attention) would clash. But I would fight really hard to live my values. I wouldn't have a problem with an 8 year old girl getting her ears pierced so I would let a son do so as well.
Thankfully my spouse generally follows my lead when it comes to stuff like this. If I can make a persuasive argument he'll listen. If you're at a standstill, I'd at least advocate for magnetic earrings and setting an age at which you'll take him to get his ears pierced if he still wants them later. |
Anonymous
Because I think it looks weird and trashy on boys. Ask all these uber progressive non-gender-conforming moms who insist that whatever style kids want is totally fine with them, their choice, how they would feel about their 8 yo boy getting a mohawk-style haircut, a rat tail with a camo tank top? Suddenly they're not so permissive and cavalier. |
Anonymous
| Regardless of whether anyone thinks it’s ok or not, the fact that OP’s husband is opposed for this non life threatening decision means that it’s a no go for now. If it were a decision like getting a flu vaccination or wearing a ski helmet, that would be a different situation. |
Anonymous
| The "no" wins |
Anonymous
+1 |