Why don't parents understand that their kids lie and/or misrepresent things?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have had kids lie and we've had teachers lie, it goes both ways. We've had great teachers, ok and really really bad.

However, what would help is you as a teacher communicating through regular emails. If you have an issue with my kid, reach out and let me know. If they are not doing the work, reach out and let me know. We will handle it.

But, also do your part. Grade things on time so we know what's going on and what needs improvement. Put assignments in the proper location online so we can find them to make sure they get done on time. When kids reach out for extra help, return emails. When parents email, return emails. When kids try to ask for help in class, help and don't ignore them.

I'll give two examples of dirty tricks that teachers play on the kids when they really don't want a child to do well. Why do they do it? Who knows.

One is jack-in-the-box grading. The teacher 'forgets' to grade a few high point assignments at the beginning of the Q. Everything looks good on mid-terms so it flies under the radar of the AP/P and parents. Towards the end of the Q, it's SURPRISE!!!

And this wasn’t a case of believing my kid over the teacher, it was all in writing.
Another is just outright changing grades. That one is easier to catch since it leaves a trail.

I've seen both happen, by specific teachers, and it's uncommon. Those types of people are just evil.

We have this with one teacher. It's really frustrating and kid is getting a much lower grade than deserved. Kid is frustrated and gave up in that class.

I didn’t even think that was the type of “lying” being discussed here. My kid had a teacher who provided an extremely detailed rubric for every assignment and then didn’t follow it - adding random other extremely picky requirements that she didn’t communicate at all and marking kids down for not meeting them.

[Anonymous]

I don't have an answer for you, OP, but in my situation, my child was being lied about. The parents spread the lies, and the lies made their way to the teachers. I 'm not sure whether the teachers continued spreading them, but they sure as hell treated my child differently. And nobody, nobody at the school stood up for my child. At one point, a lie was told that everyone at the school knew was a lie, and the hostility toward my child ended. I'm sorry that you as the teacher are not being believed. But I would have a very hard time believing a teacher over my child after what we've been through.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't have an answer for you, OP, but in my situation, my child was being lied about. The parents spread the lies, and the lies made their way to the teachers. I 'm not sure whether the teachers continued spreading them, but they sure as hell treated my child differently. And nobody, nobody at the school stood up for my child. At one point, a lie was told that everyone at the school knew was a lie, and the hostility toward my child ended. I'm sorry that you as the teacher are not being believed. But I would have a very hard time believing a teacher over my child after what we've been through.

Wow. Deja vu. I think there are parts of MCPS that are wonderful with great teachers and a great staff, but there are parts of MCPS that are completely broken. I even provided tons of evidence to the P that the teacher lied on multiple occasions. There was zero accountability.

The root cause is probably a combination of two factors.
1. Admins can jettison whistleblowers because they're not State employees, so they have no whistleblower rights in Maryland.
2. I believe one of the posters a while back that said even if a MCPS employee is a pedo, convicted of a crime, drug dealer - even that would make it tough to get rid of them.

The fix would be a universal whistleblower law (employee or not) and a clear standard for state employment?

Dunno. It will take a lot to fix MCPS, and I don't think McKnight or Wolffe will lift a finger to do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have had kids lie and we've had teachers lie, it goes both ways. We've had great teachers, ok and really really bad.

However, what would help is you as a teacher communicating through regular emails. If you have an issue with my kid, reach out and let me know. If they are not doing the work, reach out and let me know. We will handle it.

But, also do your part. Grade things on time so we know what's going on and what needs improvement. Put assignments in the proper location online so we can find them to make sure they get done on time. When kids reach out for extra help, return emails. When parents email, return emails. When kids try to ask for help in class, help and don't ignore them.

I'll give two examples of dirty tricks that teachers play on the kids when they really don't want a child to do well. Why do they do it? Who knows.

One is jack-in-the-box grading. The teacher 'forgets' to grade a few high point assignments at the beginning of the Q. Everything looks good on mid-terms so it flies under the radar of the AP/P and parents. Towards the end of the Q, it's SURPRISE!!!

Another is just outright changing grades. That one is easier to catch since it leaves a trail.

I've seen both happen, by specific teachers, and it's uncommon. Those types of people are just evil.

We have this with one teacher. It's really frustrating and kid is getting a much lower grade than deserved. Kid is frustrated and gave up in that class.

I didn’t even think that was the type of “lying” being discussed here. My kid had a teacher who provided an extremely detailed rubric for every assignment and then didn’t follow it - adding random other extremely picky requirements that she didn’t communicate at all and marking kids down for not meeting them.

Was this PBES?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Last week, another teacher and I caught a student in a pretty big lie that relied on playing us off each other. He was genuinely surprised that we talked to each other instead of just believing him. Then, he was even more surprised he was in trouble “just for lying”.

If you are a teacher, please tell me that you realize that the period goes inside of the quotation marks, "just for lying."

Unless you're a Brit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't have an answer for you, OP, but in my situation, my child was being lied about. The parents spread the lies, and the lies made their way to the teachers. I 'm not sure whether the teachers continued spreading them, but they sure as hell treated my child differently. And nobody, nobody at the school stood up for my child. At one point, a lie was told that everyone at the school knew was a lie, and the hostility toward my child ended. I'm sorry that you as the teacher are not being believed. But I would have a very hard time believing a teacher over my child after what we've been through.

Wow. Deja vu. I think there are parts of MCPS that are wonderful with great teachers and a great staff, but there are parts of MCPS that are completely broken. I even provided tons of evidence to the P that the teacher lied on multiple occasions. There was zero accountability.

The root cause is probably a combination of two factors.
1. Admins can jettison whistleblowers because they're not State employees, so they have no whistleblower rights in Maryland.
2. I believe one of the posters a while back that said even if a MCPS employee is a pedo, convicted of a crime, drug dealer - even that would make it tough to get rid of them.

The fix would be a universal whistleblower law (employee or not) and a clear standard for state employment?

Dunno. It will take a lot to fix MCPS, and I don't think McKnight or Wolffe will lift a finger to do it.

https://casetext.com/statute/code-of-maryland/article-education/division-ii-elementary-and-secondary-education/title-6-teachers-and-other-personnel/subtitle-9-public-school-employee-whistleblower-protection-act

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm curious what is is teachers get out of posting anonymously here to bash parents. It is not a good look for your profession, as you can see from the responses.

No, the responses are predictable and are precisely what OP is talking about. Excuse after excuse after excuse for their perfect little angels who can do no wrong. Welcome to DCUM.

That's not at all what I see in the responses, I see a lot of stories of teachers who were caught lying.

You “see” wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have had kids lie and we've had teachers lie, it goes both ways. We've had great teachers, ok and really really bad.

However, what would help is you as a teacher communicating through regular emails. If you have an issue with my kid, reach out and let me know. If they are not doing the work, reach out and let me know. We will handle it.

But, also do your part. Grade things on time so we know what's going on and what needs improvement. Put assignments in the proper location online so we can find them to make sure they get done on time. When kids reach out for extra help, return emails. When parents email, return emails. When kids try to ask for help in class, help and don't ignore them.

You aren’t the teacher’s boss. No, the pittance of your property taxes that goes directly to public education doesn’t make it so.

Half of property taxes go to public education.

I promise that your personal amount of property tax dollars earmarked for education don’t make you the teacher’s employer, to whom you can give a list of dictates, like PP attempted to do in their laughably self-important screed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have had kids lie and we've had teachers lie, it goes both ways. We've had great teachers, ok and really really bad.

However, what would help is you as a teacher communicating through regular emails. If you have an issue with my kid, reach out and let me know. If they are not doing the work, reach out and let me know. We will handle it.

But, also do your part. Grade things on time so we know what's going on and what needs improvement. Put assignments in the proper location online so we can find them to make sure they get done on time. When kids reach out for extra help, return emails. When parents email, return emails. When kids try to ask for help in class, help and don't ignore them.

You aren’t the teacher’s boss. No, the pittance of your property taxes that goes directly to public education doesn’t make it so.

Expecting professional behavior from a group who demand to be treated like professionals shouldn't be an enormous ask

Neat. They still don’t have to listen to you and your list of demands.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have had kids lie and we've had teachers lie, it goes both ways. We've had great teachers, ok and really really bad.

However, what would help is you as a teacher communicating through regular emails. If you have an issue with my kid, reach out and let me know. If they are not doing the work, reach out and let me know. We will handle it.

But, also do your part. Grade things on time so we know what's going on and what needs improvement. Put assignments in the proper location online so we can find them to make sure they get done on time. When kids reach out for extra help, return emails. When parents email, return emails. When kids try to ask for help in class, help and don't ignore them.

You aren’t the teacher’s boss. No, the pittance of your property taxes that goes directly to public education doesn’t make it so.

Expecting professional behavior from a group who demand to be treated like professionals shouldn't be an enormous ask

Neat. They still don’t have to listen to you and your list of demands.

DP. No, they don’t. But they shouldn’t be surprised that respect for teachers has fallen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have had kids lie and we've had teachers lie, it goes both ways. We've had great teachers, ok and really really bad.

However, what would help is you as a teacher communicating through regular emails. If you have an issue with my kid, reach out and let me know. If they are not doing the work, reach out and let me know. We will handle it.

But, also do your part. Grade things on time so we know what's going on and what needs improvement. Put assignments in the proper location online so we can find them to make sure they get done on time. When kids reach out for extra help, return emails. When parents email, return emails. When kids try to ask for help in class, help and don't ignore them.

You aren’t the teacher’s boss. No, the pittance of your property taxes that goes directly to public education doesn’t make it so.

Expecting professional behavior from a group who demand to be treated like professionals shouldn't be an enormous ask

Neat. They still don’t have to listen to you and your list of demands.

DP. No, they don’t. But they shouldn’t be surprised that respect for teachers has fallen.

It's fine...you absolutely shouldn't be surprised when teachers have no respect for parents either then. Works both ways.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have had kids lie and we've had teachers lie, it goes both ways. We've had great teachers, ok and really really bad.

However, what would help is you as a teacher communicating through regular emails. If you have an issue with my kid, reach out and let me know. If they are not doing the work, reach out and let me know. We will handle it.

But, also do your part. Grade things on time so we know what's going on and what needs improvement. Put assignments in the proper location online so we can find them to make sure they get done on time. When kids reach out for extra help, return emails. When parents email, return emails. When kids try to ask for help in class, help and don't ignore them.

You aren’t the teacher’s boss. No, the pittance of your property taxes that goes directly to public education doesn’t make it so.

Expecting professional behavior from a group who demand to be treated like professionals shouldn't be an enormous ask

Neat. They still don’t have to listen to you and your list of demands.

DP. No, they don’t. But they shouldn’t be surprised that respect for teachers has fallen.

It's fine...you absolutely shouldn't be surprised when teachers have no respect for parents either then. Works both ways.

DP do you not see the irony of making this statement on a thread started by a teacher venting about how terrible parents are? Is that a respectful, mature or professional way to deal with issues in a workplace?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have had kids lie and we've had teachers lie, it goes both ways. We've had great teachers, ok and really really bad.

However, what would help is you as a teacher communicating through regular emails. If you have an issue with my kid, reach out and let me know. If they are not doing the work, reach out and let me know. We will handle it.

But, also do your part. Grade things on time so we know what's going on and what needs improvement. Put assignments in the proper location online so we can find them to make sure they get done on time. When kids reach out for extra help, return emails. When parents email, return emails. When kids try to ask for help in class, help and don't ignore them.

You aren’t the teacher’s boss. No, the pittance of your property taxes that goes directly to public education doesn’t make it so.

Expecting professional behavior from a group who demand to be treated like professionals shouldn't be an enormous ask

Neat. They still don’t have to listen to you and your list of demands.

DP. No, they don’t. But they shouldn’t be surprised that respect for teachers has fallen.

No one cares about the“respect” of entitled parents who’ve spent three years complaining, whining, and throwing tantrums about every move teachers make and don’t make and about distance learning during a pandemic. Shrug.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have had kids lie and we've had teachers lie, it goes both ways. We've had great teachers, ok and really really bad.

However, what would help is you as a teacher communicating through regular emails. If you have an issue with my kid, reach out and let me know. If they are not doing the work, reach out and let me know. We will handle it.

But, also do your part. Grade things on time so we know what's going on and what needs improvement. Put assignments in the proper location online so we can find them to make sure they get done on time. When kids reach out for extra help, return emails. When parents email, return emails. When kids try to ask for help in class, help and don't ignore them.

You aren’t the teacher’s boss. No, the pittance of your property taxes that goes directly to public education doesn’t make it so.

Expecting professional behavior from a group who demand to be treated like professionals shouldn't be an enormous ask

Neat. They still don’t have to listen to you and your list of demands.

DP. No, they don’t. But they shouldn’t be surprised that respect for teachers has fallen.

It's fine...you absolutely shouldn't be surprised when teachers have no respect for parents either then. Works both ways.

DP do you not see the irony of making this statement on a thread started by a teacher venting about how terrible parents are? Is that a respectful, mature or professional way to deal with issues in a workplace?

You get back what you put out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have had kids lie and we've had teachers lie, it goes both ways. We've had great teachers, ok and really really bad.

However, what would help is you as a teacher communicating through regular emails. If you have an issue with my kid, reach out and let me know. If they are not doing the work, reach out and let me know. We will handle it.

But, also do your part. Grade things on time so we know what's going on and what needs improvement. Put assignments in the proper location online so we can find them to make sure they get done on time. When kids reach out for extra help, return emails. When parents email, return emails. When kids try to ask for help in class, help and don't ignore them.

You aren’t the teacher’s boss. No, the pittance of your property taxes that goes directly to public education doesn’t make it so.

Expecting professional behavior from a group who demand to be treated like professionals shouldn't be an enormous ask

Neat. They still don’t have to listen to you and your list of demands.

DP. No, they don’t. But they shouldn’t be surprised that respect for teachers has fallen.

It's fine...you absolutely shouldn't be surprised when teachers have no respect for parents either then. Works both ways.

DP do you not see the irony of making this statement on a thread started by a teacher venting about how terrible parents are? Is that a respectful, mature or professional way to deal with issues in a workplace?

Agree, PP. Anyone who thought that teachers respected parents was disabused of that notion during COVID when teachers accused any parent who wanted kids in school of hating their kids and wanting everyone to die. We get, teachers, you hate parents and we all s$ck. You could also consider the possibility that not every parent is awful and that sometimes a teacher, who has a lot of power over children, is wrong. Sometimes, both the student and the teacher are wrong! And when that happens, I deal with my kid and I expect the adults to take responsibility for their actions. But that nuance is too much for your message.