Sibling abuse trigger warning

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:With 4 kids under 8, it seems like your kids are safer staying than risking your DH gets unsupervised custody. At least you can ensure your stepson is never in your house.

There are a lot of parents who will always support their child even if they are a sexual deviant, serial killer, etc. Think how hard it is for your husband knowing that one of his kids abused another of his kids. He has known the 17 year old so much longer than the 6 year old. If you have a son and when he is a teen if he does something like that would you disown him? Or try to get him help?

I think disowning him or getting him help are both better options than denying that it ever occurred and trying to carrying on like nothing happened. Honestly I wouldn't judge if he was trying to get him help but the denial is what is dangerous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm assuming you have no job or hope of leaving your husband?

I wouldn't be surprised if he were an abuser too.

I have a job and hopes of leaving. We found out it has happened other times . Poice report was filed states attorney declined to proceed with charges said my daughter would make a poor witness and some other bs. Step son is not allowed near my kids or in my home. Not by way of court order by way of mutual agreement not court order.

The reaction of my husband is beyond terrifying. He is now in complete denial and using states attorneys decision as justification. I plan to leave at end of school year. What is scary is if I leave and he gets any visitation. He does not believe this even happened he will likely bring stepson around my kids if I am not in picture. Getting full custody is difficult even in these situations. I am afraid court will think I am trying to alienate my husband. Ideally I want to leave and move states away so I don't have to worry about stepson. I am willing to give up child support if husband will give up overnight visits. Husband is unreasonable and i am scared for the future. We are in counseling. Counselor thinks he is in shock. I don't think he will come around. I am trying to plan a calculated exit at the end of school year.

Does DD have a cellphone? If not, give her one with instructions to call you immediately if she sees him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm assuming you have no job or hope of leaving your husband?

I wouldn't be surprised if he were an abuser too.

I have a job and hopes of leaving. We found out it has happened other times . Poice report was filed states attorney declined to proceed with charges said my daughter would make a poor witness and some other bs. Step son is not allowed near my kids or in my home. Not by way of court order by way of mutual agreement not court order.

The reaction of my husband is beyond terrifying. He is now in complete denial and using states attorneys decision as justification. I plan to leave at end of school year. What is scary is if I leave and he gets any visitation. He does not believe this even happened he will likely bring stepson around my kids if I am not in picture. Getting full custody is difficult even in these situations. I am afraid court will think I am trying to alienate my husband. Ideally I want to leave and move states away so I don't have to worry about stepson. I am willing to give up child support if husband will give up overnight visits. Husband is unreasonable and i am scared for the future. We are in counseling. Counselor thinks he is in shock. I don't think he will come around. I am trying to plan a calculated exit at the end of school year.

Does DD have a cellphone? If not, give her one with instructions to call you immediately if she sees him.

ps you can file a complaint or objection against the state attorney and sue ss civilly and pursue a court order on your own. I would do the restraining order at minimum in case your husband comes up with the idea of having them meet and "discuss" it to make it go away.

[Anonymous]

OP- where is you DH’s ex wife in all of this? Curious is she is still alive and if you have had a conversation with her?

[Anonymous]

You are being brave, and a great mom.

I wish you continued strength and wisdom.