why do people judge grandparents care so differently from (quality) hired help?

[Anonymous]

Everyone doesn’t have the same type of parents, so maybe you really don’t have the luxury of parents that can take your kids. From your OP though it sounds like imo you don’t really want to try and are taking the easy babysitter route. There’s nothing wrong with a sitter and some can be really good but nothing replaces a grandparent either. It seems you make excuses about why the sitter is better and the grandparents would be a horrible choice. So maybe You should ask yourself if they really can’t do it or if you don’t want them to because of your own issues. A grandparent /grandkid relationship can be very different than the relationship you may have had with your own parents growing up. You can do whatever works for your family, but it could be hindering your kids relationship with their grandparents if you just assume they won’t be good babysitters. Grandparent relationships can be invaluable for kids so I encourage you throw your preconceived notions and childhood baggage to the side and give your kids and your parents the opportunity to try and build that relationship. Some of your kids may not get as much out of it as others but give them a solid chance to try. Maybe they wouldn’t be great for a whole weekend...but do you really know unless you give them a chance? There are pros and cons to sitters vs grandparents, but I would always try the grandparents route before a sitter because there are things grandparents can offer that a sitter never could

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you don’t know the difference between the love of a grandparent and the ‘love’ of a person who is hired to perform a task then I am sad for you.

This!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Grandparents are family. Its mutually beneficial when kids stay with the grandparents for the weekend- all parties benefit from this lifelong relationship being nurtured. Not sure why that needs to be spelled out for someone that spending the week with grandma is different than spending the week with a rotation of paid overnight sitters.

because these days many grandparents are in their 70s, not physically up for caring for several small children, and use old school approaches to discipline and say flat out sexist / homophonic etc things?

yes of course an ideal and capable grandparent is better because they're emotionally invested, but its a huge assumption that many / most grandparents are ideal or capable. and its not better for my 5yo to have a weekend of butting heads with my overly gruff dad who doesn't understand what is a reasonable expectation for a 5 year old than it is for him to be with a loving and fun sitter.

who in the world does a random rotation over the course of the week?!

no, it's actually better for your 5 yo to butt heads with your dad. not only does that build their relationship, but also, provides more social challenge, which will help him grow and mature. there will be all kinds of people in the world your 5 yo goes into. not everyone is going to be fun and hold correct opinions.

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