Taking away the car

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, in the end it is not about your mother's feelings, it is about safety for others on the road. My MIL actually killed a man: literally, ran him over. She was in her 90s and had refused to stop driving. Better to take away the keys or disable the car than have that happen.

OP here. I agree 100%. I am as aware of the dangers as any sensible person would be. But there is little I can do if my sister fixes the car and gives her back the keys, which is what is now happening. I am looking into seeing if it is possible to report her anonymously to the DMV.

If you are VA, family members can make anonymous reports. My sibs and I were on the verge of doing just that with our mother when her doctors (I assume!) saved us by taking it upon himself. Mom got a letter from the DMV saying her license had been suspended for medical reasons, and letting her know she could appeal by coming in and retaking the in-car test. She was enraged-- but also completely incapable of taking and passing the test. We have the keys to her car....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In NZ you have to have a road test/medical certificate at 75 & 80 then every two years after that. The fear of the road test forces the issue for many seniors.

This is what we did with my mother in law. Her neurologist said that she needed to take a driving test. (I think he was required to report her cognitive issues?) The fear of the test meant she agreed reluctantly to stop driving. Sister in law made an excuse to move the car and eventually to donate it to a family in need (with MILs permission). A couple of weeks later she went looking for her car, trying to open random car doors but she has now accepted it. It helped that the doctor was the bad guy not family.