Am I raising a brat, and how do I fix this?

[Anonymous]

Wow. The disrespect is mind blowing. 10 years of turning her into an ungrateful a**hole isn't going to be easy to fix. I think she'll just get worse from here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow. The disrespect is mind blowing. 10 years of turning her into an ungrateful a**hole isn't going to be easy to fix. I think she'll just get worse from here.

The child hasn't hit puberty yet. OP is aware. This can be done.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know the first part of my question is true. We’ve turned her into a brat.

She’s used to us catering. Doesn’t like a dinner, I’ll pop something in the oven for her.

I pick her up from school and need to run an errand? She doesn’t want to go so I go out of my way to drop her off at home.

She’s 10.

We sort of went cold turkey and stopped the cooking of other food, and like yesterday, I had the day off but did other things, so when I picked her up I had to stop to grocery shop. I didn’t drop her off at home.

The attitude is astounding. She told me, you had all day to do this.

I know it’ll get better once she realizes we aren’t catering to her anymore, but any tips on making this an easier transition?

And please don’t attack me, I’m trying to do better. I realize my error and I’m trying to fix it.

Please, god, I beg of you. Go draconian. I'm dealing with teenagers I did this with and my life is utter hell. The teachers are fed up, the dance teachers are fed up. And yet. my kids are the "good" kids! It's bananas. I cannot emphasize enough that you need to find strength inside you to instill the concepts of gratitude and consequences. It will only get worse.

Personally, as an HR professional, I am fascinated with what this means for workplaces in 10 years. I'm a rebellious, hyper-diverse person, and yet even I could be cancelled. We are so afraid of boundaries and enforcing consequences now, it's obvious there will be a price to pay in the near future. Do your kids a favor, make them understand gratitude and consequences.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd be super honest with her. The adults in the household sit her down and say "You've become really spoiled and bratty. It's been kind of okay because you've been little and cute but you're growing up, and it's turning into b*tchiness. If you continue this way, people won't like you, you won't get jobs, you won't have friends, nobody will invite you to do anything, and on and on. So we are going to help you to become a better person. That's part of our job as your parents. Going forward, you are NOT the center of this household. You will get everything you need, and some of the things you want, sometimes. When you forget your manners, we will remind you once. If you refuse to say please or thank you, you will be sent to your room until you're ready to behave appropriately. Understand?"

And then be VERY consistent. Very, Very consistent.

Yeah, I've tried that. She serious DNGAF. It's too late. I went to the hospital last year because of this insanity. Guess what? I warned her repeatedly, and now she's going to in-patient therapy because her entitle ment extends to taking what she wants from stores. Now involves police. I am DONE. I will throw my kid under the bus because she needs to learn. If in-patient doesn't set her straight, next step is thrid world country.

[Anonymous]

What is the story with all these parents serving different meals to different family members and then snacks before bed? Why are they eating a snack before bed, which I imagine at this age should be about 9, and they just had dinner at 6? The ones I know who are doing this have kids who won't eat their dinner and that's why they're hungry later at night.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know the first part of my question is true. We’ve turned her into a brat.

She’s used to us catering. Doesn’t like a dinner, I’ll pop something in the oven for her.

I pick her up from school and need to run an errand? She doesn’t want to go so I go out of my way to drop her off at home.

She’s 10.

We sort of went cold turkey and stopped the cooking of other food, and like yesterday, I had the day off but did other things, so when I picked her up I had to stop to grocery shop. I didn’t drop her off at home.

The attitude is astounding. She told me, you had all day to do this.

I know it’ll get better once she realizes we aren’t catering to her anymore, but any tips on making this an easier transition?

And please don’t attack me, I’m trying to do better. I realize my error and I’m trying to fix it.

You shouldn’t be taking your kid grocery shopping during the pandemic. It’s safer for her and others to leave her at home.

Otherwise, I generally agree with your thinking. I’m not sure what to stay about fixing it.

But given covid, I would not take her with you on errands that require going inside.

It’s been a year and 8 months since covid hit. You should know by now that you are not getting covid while you’re masked at the grocery stores and not standing next to anyone for more than 15 minutes at a time.

YOU should know by now that while masks are helpful, they don’t eleimate the risk entirely and people can absolutely catch and spread covid in the grocery store.

And the fifteen minute rule was pre delta, idiot.

Plus, there’s aerosols.

I don’t get people who don’t understand they can catch covid in grocery stores. Don’t take your kid there if you don’t have to.

My 9yo loves to grocery shop and cook. And I've been bringing her to the grocery store since April 2020.

Honestly, all you people that have locked our kids away in your their teeny tiny little lives are going to raise completely dysfunctional adults.

Take them to the grocery store. They will be fine.

For my DD, cooking was one of her greatest pleasures; and shopping and cooking with her is one of my joys. The cost of not allowing her to do that, or not sharing these experiences together, outweighs the risk.

And yes, all your anxiety-soaked hypochondriacs will scream at me "Covid Denier! We'll see how you feel when you all catch Covid." But we havent.

And we probably wont.

And if we do, we're actually going to be just fine.

You guys are nuts