Sister says 14yo nephew not coming to my wedding because of his sports tournament. Thoughts?

[Anonymous]

Honestly, he's 14 plus he's a dude. He probably doesn't care as much as you think he does.

I personally would rather he go to the wedding but if what all the previous posters are saying is true that his time on the team will be cut if he misses that then if I were the parent I wouldn't want him to miss it either.

What a mess up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: Honestly, he's 14 plus he's a dude. He probably doesn't care as much as you think he does.

I personally would rather he go to the wedding but if what all the previous posters are saying is true that his time on the team will be cut if he misses that then if I were the parent I wouldn't want him to miss it either.

What a mess up.

op's nephew is 16 or 17 by now, lol

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: Honestly, he's 14 plus he's a dude. He probably doesn't care as much as you think he does.

I personally would rather he go to the wedding but if what all the previous posters are saying is true that his time on the team will be cut if he misses that then if I were the parent I wouldn't want him to miss it either.

What a mess up.

op's nephew is 16 or 17 by now, lol

And working on that college scholarship!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: Honestly, he's 14 plus he's a dude. He probably doesn't care as much as you think he does.

I personally would rather he go to the wedding but if what all the previous posters are saying is true that his time on the team will be cut if he misses that then if I were the parent I wouldn't want him to miss it either.

What a mess up.

op's nephew is 16 or 17 by now, lol

And working on that college scholarship!

And OP is divorced now.

[Anonymous]

OP sounds like a narcissist. Me me me waaa. Get over yourself OP. The kid could give 2 shits about your boring stuffy wedding. How many kids are breaking their necks to go to a wedding? The answer is none. None ever in the history of weddings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: Honestly, he's 14 plus he's a dude. He probably doesn't care as much as you think he does.

I personally would rather he go to the wedding but if what all the previous posters are saying is true that his time on the team will be cut if he misses that then if I were the parent I wouldn't want him to miss it either.

What a mess up.

op's nephew is 16 or 17 by now, lol

And working on that college scholarship!

And OP is divorced now.

Or perhaps posting on the relationship forum about how her husband bought her exercise clothes when she didn't want any. Or how the cat ate the steak she was going to cook, left on the counter, and her husband verbally abused her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP: In our school they are very vindictive if you miss a tournament for ANY reason. They just are. So nephew will be sitting on the bench unless he is a star for the rest of the season. I would let him miss the wedding.

+1000 if you had teens and you know how vindictive and unfair this attitude is you would be shocked and angry as we all are. It's hard to believe but true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So much assuming going on. Not everyone who makes a HS team has worked hard since age 5 and the OP gave zero info from her sister that suggested this was anything beyond a normal tournament (normal games could be important to them) or that the coach would act any certain way or have any position on it or that there would be a drastic negative impact. Some of you guys are conveniently setting up a false comparison: wedding or crushing the kid's efforts and sports future. I think that goes to the warped headspace many of sports parents have these days. Step back and gain some perspective. If everyone shuts up and assumes or goes along, no wonder the craziness of kid sports perpetuates. Everyone is so scared of a kid not "making it" for an activity that will end after HS.

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So much assuming going on. Not everyone who makes a HS team has worked hard since age 5 and the OP gave zero info from her sister that suggested this was anything beyond a normal tournament (normal games could be important to them) or that the coach would act any certain way or have any position on it or that there would be a drastic negative impact. Some of you guys are conveniently setting up a false comparison: wedding or crushing the kid's efforts and sports future. I think that goes to the warped headspace many of sports parents have these days. Step back and gain some perspective. If everyone shuts up and assumes or goes along, no wonder the craziness of kid sports perpetuates. Everyone is so scared of a kid not "making it" for an activity that will end after HS.

This.

+2

Let him miss, and let it go, OP. He will have a wedding some day, which you may or may not attend.