Young kids and extended parental travel

[Anonymous]

I'm going to be on an out of state assignment for work for three months this fall. I am wondering if anyone has any thoughts on how I can make this easier for my 2 kids, who are 4 and 6. And for me, because I am going to miss them terribly!

Thanks!

[Anonymous]

Skype or FaceTime every day. Have the other parent send picture daily. Get a ton of cheap gifts and have the kids open them during the phone call as it gives them something to do. Lots of kids that age do not like to talk or skype.

[Anonymous]

Read books over sype

[Anonymous]

Go home every two weeks, or have them come visit you every two weeks. FaceTime each day.

[Anonymous]

If this is just out of the state why not have them fly out halfway through or you can fly home to visit. Otherwise facetime often.

[Anonymous]

How come you can't fly home every other weekend? Are you expected to work on weekends?
My DH travels M-TH every week. It is harder on him than the kids but at first the kids had a hard time too. FaceTime and phone calls are essential.

[Anonymous]

Thanks for the suggestions. I am going to come home at least once, hopefully more. But I am going to be on a very intense work schedule and in a remote area where the nearest airport is a couple of hours away. Part of me thinks that coming home for just 18 hours would make it worse on them?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for the suggestions. I am going to come home at least once, hopefully more. But I am going to be on a very intense work schedule and in a remote area where the nearest airport is a couple of hours away. Part of me thinks that coming home for just 18 hours would make it worse on them?

I don't think it would be worse on them. 3 months is a really long time without a parent. Come back, hug, snuggle, eat meals with them. As much as you can.

[Anonymous]

You probably wouldn't do this, but I'd add don't try to micromanage the person left at home keeping things running.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You probably wouldn't do this, but I'd add don't try to micromanage the person left at home keeping things running.

I appreciate you reminding me, actually. My husband is going to be on his own and I admit I'm nervous about that.

[Anonymous]

Honestly? I would pass on the assignment, up to and including resigning. I know it's not what you want to hear, but there's no way I'd leave my kids (2 and 5) for three months.

My DH did a 3-month stint overseas when our first was 2, and his relationship with DC hasn't really ever recovered. It has made me extremely conservative about spending time apart as a family. I feel for military families who deal with deployments -- it is incredibly tough.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly? I would pass on the assignment, up to and including resigning. I know it's not what you want to hear, but there's no way I'd leave my kids (2 and 5) for three months.

My DH did a 3-month stint overseas when our first was 2, and his relationship with DC hasn't really ever recovered. It has made me extremely conservative about spending time apart as a family. I feel for military families who deal with deployments -- it is incredibly tough.

I appreciate your feedback. You're right that it isn't what I want to hear. Passing on the assignment simply is not an option. Looking back on it, what could your DH have done differently to keep the bond stronger? That's what I am looking for.

[Anonymous]

I don't understand how a regular job can expect you to relocate for 3 months without frequent opportunities to come home, especially when you have young children. What line of work is this?
I'm saying this as a military spouse. What can be so encompassing that you can't tell them you need to come home every other weekend Friday-Monday?

[Anonymous]

I would never take such an assignment. They can't force you. I could quit if they did.

How can you even consider this?

Btw, people will judge you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would never take such an assignment. They can't force you. I could quit if they did.

How can you even consider this?

Btw, people will judge you.

Well, then, it's a good thing they asked me and not you. Judge away.