Would you let your parent move in with you?
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Anonymous
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If an elderly parent needed care, would you take them into your home on a permanent basis? Just curious. Never thought I would be in this situation, but now I am. BTW, I am married with school-aged kids. Feeling guilty about sending parent to assisted living when I have a nice home. Not sure if I could maintain my sanity w/ 24/7 care, though.
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Anonymous
| No |
Anonymous
| My in laws, yes. My parents, no. |
Anonymous
| Yes, but not if they need 24/7 care. |
Anonymous
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I would, but that's the model I grew up with. I was very sad when my dad passed suddenly, and never had the chance to live with us.
But I think it very much depends on your circumstances - both how much care is needed, how much space and privacy your home offers, and everyone's personalities. |
Anonymous
| no. divorced parents would make that very awkeard. I can't choose one over the other. unfortunatelytheir divorce has also made it very hard for them to afford a nice place. |
Anonymous
| I just did. My mother wanted to stay in their home in NC and she got her wish. She died a little over two years ago. Last summer my father was diagnosed with metasticized squamous skin cancer. After one operation in NC, we moved him to our house for radiation and what ended up to be a second operation. He entered hospice shortly after the radiation W as done and died two weeks ago tomorrow. We moved him into DH and my room so he could have the en suite bathroom. Our house is a custom L shaped rambler so it was perfect for him. It was a long slog, but worth it. I am comforted that we did the right thing for him and he was comfortable and happy. DH was fantastic. |
Anonymous
| Yes. I didn't ask to be born, but they didn't ask to get old. When they get old, they are my responsibility, just like I was theirs. |
Anonymous
Whose responsibility are people who grow old but don't have children then? |
Anonymous
| Yes I would but both of my parents died young. My husband's parents are gone also. My sister was in a very bad situation and moved in a month ago. |
Anonymous
| We moved my MIL here after her housing situation deteriorated and we had no choice. She had dementia and was being taken advantage of. We did it for 6 months (well, I) and got her into a nursing home. She could not be left alone or care for herself. It was very hard, even not working but we couldn't see any choice. Our house is not set up for extended family as its very small and one bathroom. It would be hard to bring in an aide given our house. I'd be more likely to do it long term if we had a suite or space and could bring in help. |
Anonymous
NP here. Yeah, that's not good reasoning. While PP didn't ask to be born, her parents' actions caused it and that is what their responsibility stems from. But PP didn't cause her parents to get old. That would have happened even if she hadn't been born. |
Anonymous
| Nearby assisted living seems like a great idea if she can afford it. |
Anonymous
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Yes to my mom (a widow) but maybe not if she needed 24/7 care or if accessibility became an issue (we can live on one level but our old house would not accomodate a wheelchair)
I'm not sure if she would agree to it, though... No to my in-laws (and my DH would agree on that) |
Anonymous
| Yes. |