Would you leave your spouse if he/she was in an accident that left him/her in a wheelchair?

[Anonymous]

Not me.
Asking because a good friend of mine is dating a man whose ex wife left him for that reason.
I don't think I would. Seems cold to me, but I'm not in that situation.

[Anonymous]

No. I don't think my husband would become aggressive or irrational with his impaired mobility.

Having lived with a chronically ill family member, I know it can play games with your mind, and that some people are not equipped to handle that. My mother had a physical disease that depressed her - she became more and more anxious and isolated, and guilted and manipulated me for years into staying home after school and never going out. Even during the summer. She would accuse my father of staying late at work to avoid her, of having a second family, she would swear at us and rant and whine.
I escaped as soon as I could.

[Anonymous]

I agree with PP - generally know if the person stayed a good partner in the ways they could after an understandable adjustment phase. But if they become unbearable, I would feel an obligation to make sure they were taken care of but not to go down with the ship.

[Anonymous]

I don't know how you could possibly know before it actually happens. As the PPs said, the change in personality/aggression/anger can sour even the best relationship. This is one of those situations where you haven't walked in that person's shoes (ex-wife) and can't really judge or compare yourself.

[Anonymous]

I could understand if the spouse became abusive like in the case of your parents.

According to my friend he's a sweet guy. I've met him once and he seemed nice.

[Anonymous]

I'd like to think not, but who knows. People do ugly things in ugly situations.

[Anonymous]

Such an awful thing to think about, but no. My husband fell into ill health and a wheel chair and then bed ridden and then he died. It was horrendous and I am still devastated. So happy I stayed with him and loved him until the end. Just devastating.

[Anonymous]

Yes.

[Anonymous]

Of course not. Christ.

[Anonymous]

If you would leave, why get married? You do realize that the "in sickness and health" means something, right?

I understand if he becomes abusive, but aside from that, abondoning your spouse in that situation makes your vows a fraud.

[Anonymous]

Never. BUT if he was mean to me while in that wheelchair yes I would.

[Anonymous]

Can the person still have sex and stay thin and fit? Because if not then 80% of posters in this forum would hit the road.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Such an awful thing to think about, but no. My husband fell into ill health and a wheel chair and then bed ridden and then he died. It was horrendous and I am still devastated. So happy I stayed with him and loved him until the end. Just devastating.

So sorry, PP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not me.
Asking because a good friend of mine is dating a man whose ex wife left him for that reason.
I don't think I would. Seems cold to me, but I'm not in that situation.

Did the man receive a settlement from the accident?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not me.
Asking because a good friend of mine is dating a man whose ex wife left him for that reason.
I don't think I would. Seems cold to me, but I'm not in that situation.

Did the man receive a settlement from the accident?

I do not know.