Au Pair just asked for more money

[Anonymous]

They are terrible, the program is trash now

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They are terrible, the program is trash now

Please think of the difficulty for the AP of being away from home, perhaps for the first time, of most likely never having had the same job responsibilities. Like any new hire, you need to provide extensive training, guidance, positive motivation...some families never even give the AP a written schedule and set of expectations.

[Anonymous]

PP said: "Glad we didn’t fall for the “aupairs have the upper hand” crap. "

That's a very ugly statement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:$200 a week is all people pay full time au pairs?

Plus room, board, a phone and often a car.

How much did you have left over at the end of the month when all these were paid for when you were 20?

It’s basically indentured servitude. In the past, it was somewhat justified as a cultural exchange (although never really was), but that’s completely impossible during COVID. So I bet this au pair is doing more work than ever. No wonder she wants (and deserves) a raise! Yet this cheap-o think she’s generous because she’s exceeding the program minimum by $5?! I hope she walks and leaves your a$$. A better family will pick her up in a second. Disgusting people.

Have you had an au pair? If you are a good family these girls have it great. The work they do isn't all that hard, in many cases just dropping off and picking up kids. They spend lots of their weekends with other girls they meet from their home countries. It's a balance when done right, and $195.75 or so a week is plenty for them.

Typical attempt to justify, but it doesn’t work. You are exploiting women from other countries and paying them less than minimum wage to care for your children. It’s even worse during a pandemic. In any other context this would be illegal, if not for this weird loophole that so clearly should be closed. You are cheap, terrible people. All your friends and family think it, trust me.

My cousin took a gap year between high school and college and came to the U.S. as an au pair. Her dad was an alcoholic and dies when she was 14, leaving the family bankrupt. Being an au pair gave her the opportunity to come to the U.S. and travel. She loved it.
Would she want her daughter to do it? I doubt, but she is very well of and her daughter can afford to travel anywhere she'd like to. Only putting this on here because this is not indentured servitude for many who do, it is a chance to travel and earn some money...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:$200 a week is all people pay full time au pairs?

Plus room, board, a phone and often a car.

How much did you have left over at the end of the month when all these were paid for when you were 20?

It’s basically indentured servitude. In the past, it was somewhat justified as a cultural exchange (although never really was), but that’s completely impossible during COVID. So I bet this au pair is doing more work than ever. No wonder she wants (and deserves) a raise! Yet this cheap-o think she’s generous because she’s exceeding the program minimum by $5?! I hope she walks and leaves your a$$. A better family will pick her up in a second. Disgusting people.

Have you had an au pair? If you are a good family these girls have it great. The work they do isn't all that hard, in many cases just dropping off and picking up kids. They spend lots of their weekends with other girls they meet from their home countries. It's a balance when done right, and $195.75 or so a week is plenty for them.

Typical attempt to justify, but it doesn’t work. You are exploiting women from other countries and paying them less than minimum wage to care for your children. It’s even worse during a pandemic. In any other context this would be illegal, if not for this weird loophole that so clearly should be closed. You are cheap, terrible people. All your friends and family think it, trust me.

My cousin took a gap year between high school and college and came to the U.S. as an au pair. Her dad was an alcoholic and dies when she was 14, leaving the family bankrupt. Being an au pair gave her the opportunity to come to the U.S. and travel. She loved it.
Would she want her daughter to do it? I doubt, but she is very well of and her daughter can afford to travel anywhere she'd like to. Only putting this on here because this is not indentured servitude for many who do, it is a chance to travel and earn some money...

Sorry forgot to add- after college my cousin got a job as legal secretary at White & Case (in home country) through a connection of her HF.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They are terrible, the program is trash now

Please think of the difficulty for the AP of being away from home, perhaps for the first time, of most likely never having had the same job responsibilities. Like any new hire, you need to provide extensive training, guidance, positive motivation...some families never even give the AP a written schedule and set of expectations.

It seems like way too much work. You have a young inexperienced childcare provider who is also having a cultural experience. Sounds exhausting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:AuPairWorld recommends that au pairs be given the day off on public holidays such as Memorial Day, 4th of July, Labor Day, Thanksgiving, Christmas, NYD, and MLK Day. This is in addition to their vacation days. Unless of course both parents must work on a national holiday.

Well, I work at least a few hours on each federal holiday. We are not Christians and neither are our au pairs, so we give other days off for religious observance. We make this clear during matching.

[Anonymous]

We have always paid over stipend. But the idea that au pairs are underpaid does make me chuckle a little. Every au pair I’ve ever had has sent giant boxes of clothes and shoes home. Our most recent au pair is leaving today and is shipping home a 100 lb box of crap she bought. These girls typically have no bills at all, so it’s all fun money.

And the idea that they’re poor exploited young women just doesn’t map onto reality. I’ve never personally known an au pair who sends a dime home. They just blow it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have always paid over stipend. But the idea that au pairs are underpaid does make me chuckle a little. Every au pair I’ve ever had has sent giant boxes of clothes and shoes home. Our most recent au pair is leaving today and is shipping home a 100 lb box of crap she bought. These girls typically have no bills at all, so it’s all fun money.

And the idea that they’re poor exploited young women just doesn’t map onto reality. I’ve never personally known an au pair who sends a dime home. They just blow it.

That’s the whole point. It doesn’t matter to the legislators whether or not they are (some are), but they are setting the rules for all. These rules are meant to be fair and equitable in reference to all except to what you are now used to through the years of thus area being neglected. That should also be easier for you, since the new rules will be universal and remove variance from the process.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have always paid over stipend. But the idea that au pairs are underpaid does make me chuckle a little. Every au pair I’ve ever had has sent giant boxes of clothes and shoes home. Our most recent au pair is leaving today and is shipping home a 100 lb box of crap she bought. These girls typically have no bills at all, so it’s all fun money.

And the idea that they’re poor exploited young women just doesn’t map onto reality. I’ve never personally known an au pair who sends a dime home. They just blow it.

That’s the whole point. It doesn’t matter to the legislators whether or not they are (some are), but they are setting the rules for all. These rules are meant to be fair and equitable in reference to all except to what you are now used to through the years of thus area being neglected. That should also be easier for you, since the new rules will be universal and remove variance from the process.

First of all, it's very easy to pay a higher stipend, so, no, it won't be easier.

Second, this would be terrible for me, since I would lose my competitive advantage. Unless you have a plan to "remove variance" and make things "fair and equitable" in matching for nonwhite families.

[Anonymous]

Here is the US Appeals Court ruling detailing rejection of the appeal (Supreme Court also refused to hear the case):
http://media.ca1.uscourts.gov/pdf.opinions/17-2140P-01A.pdf

MA is now studying the au pair program to see if claims by host families have any merit. That study should be ready by January.

Meanwhile, some observations others shared from this process:

There is no simple solution to [the childcare] crisis, but we believe everyone will agree that creating a child care program that requires primarily young women from other countries to work for sub-minimum wages is not the answer.

As we join with other organizations to fight for longer-term solutions, we hope that there can be short-term solutions to ease the financial burden on host families that do not come at the expense of au pairs. The au pair program has many costs, particularly the upfront program fee of up to $10,000 that host families pay to the sponsor agencies -- almost as much as the families pay to the au pairs themselves.The sponsor agencies are largely for-profit businesses and, in some cases are part of multinational corporations. These sponsor agencies profit both from the fees paid by families and au pairs. We hope that all stakeholders, including sponsor agencies, can be part of the conversation about making the program more affordable, while still compliant with the law.

[Anonymous]

ISN'T THIS A CULTURAL EXCHANGE PROGRAM?

When this program was formed decades ago, its original intent may have been to be a cultural exchange, with au pairs serving not as full-time child care providers, but as “mothers’ helpers” for stay-at-home mothers. Over time, between the increased demand for affordable childcare due to the lack of investment in childcare (and other benefits such as parental leave) from the government and families’ workplaces, rising living costs, stagnant wages, spotty government regulation and questionable business practices of au pair agencies, the program has transformed into a full-fledged labor program — as the U.S. Department of State itself has acknowledged.

[Anonymous]

Are there components of the program that truly promote an exchange of cultures and languages?

Absolutely. At the end of the day, however, au pairs are required to provide up to 45 hours per week of child care, often to multiple children. This is work and inherently transforms the program into a labor program, regardless of original program intentions.

[Anonymous]

WHAT DO WE HEAR FROM AU PAIRS?

We frequently hear from current and former au pairs. While we know that many au pairs have very positive experiences, we often hear from au pairs who are exploited, do not receive the protections to which they are entitled under program rules or the law, and do not get the support they need from their sponsor agencies. To learn more about common grievances we hear from au pairs and more about our structural critique of the program, please check out a report to which we contributed: Shortchanged: the Big Business Behind the Low Wage J-1 Au Pair Program, put out by the International Human Rights Law Clinic and other national organizations. Below is a sample of complaints that we hear from au pairs in their workplaces (the homes of their host families):

Sexual assault and harassment
Being expected to work more than 45 hours per week
Being asked to do non-child care work, for example house cleaning
Not being given sufficient food, being mocked when cooking meals from their home country, being left at home without food when the host family goes out to eat, etc.
Not being allowed to share kitchen space when host families are cooking
Taking care of children beyond their host family’s children
Being subjected to sexist and racist comments
Being abandoned by host parents to care for children for over multiple days
Being given a walk-in closet as a bedroom and lacking basic privacy in their rooms.
Not being supported in taking classes, going to church, etc.

[Anonymous]

About those great host families:

Principally, we believe that au pairs and host families do not receive sufficient support or guidance from sponsor agencies. We know that many host families are caring and respectful. Many go above and beyond what the program requires of them. As wonderful as these families are, we encounter far too many violations of au pairs’ basic rights. Furthermore, these “above and beyond” benefits are not guaranteed, so while some au pairs may receive them, others do not.