Why do people change their mind and want to remarry again?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would be the difference in your relationship if you got married? (Finances aside). Do you live together? Do you spend most of your time together? Are you each other's "other person"?

I guess I've never fully understood why someone is so against marriage unless it's that level of commitment they are against. In which case, that's the issue here. She wants to be more committed/serious than you.

I know I don't ever want to be taken advantage of again. If I want to get out I want to be able to just walk out a door. I dont want my money or health in jeopardy.

I wouldn't date or marry someone with this level of baggage.

+1. You’ve got one eye on your path to the door at all times. No thanks.

The best middle-aged partners are widowers who were happily married.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She’s looking for a gesture of commitment beyond dating - whether it is legal marriage, moving in together, or buying a home together, or maybe even a non-legally binding commitment ceremony. Something that indicates that you won’t just walk out the door because the fight you both had one day was big. It doesn’t seem like you are ready to commit to her long term.

Gosh women can be so desperate and pathetic. I feel so sorry for OP’s girlfriend. If you don’t see being with me as a privilege, goodbye. 👋

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She’s looking for a gesture of commitment beyond dating - whether it is legal marriage, moving in together, or buying a home together, or maybe even a non-legally binding commitment ceremony. Something that indicates that you won’t just walk out the door because the fight you both had one day was big. It doesn’t seem like you are ready to commit to her long term.

Gosh women can be so desperate and pathetic. I feel so sorry for OP’s girlfriend. If you don’t see being with me as a privilege, goodbye. 👋

Lovely person you are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would be the difference in your relationship if you got married? (Finances aside). Do you live together? Do you spend most of your time together? Are you each other's "other person"?

I guess I've never fully understood why someone is so against marriage unless it's that level of commitment they are against. In which case, that's the issue here. She wants to be more committed/serious than you.

I do not want to be married again because my ex wife made the experience distaetasful. I am not against marriage I am just against marriage for ME. We don't live together. She suggested that at some point but I wasn't enthusiastic about it. I will say we are each other's person. I have a great relationship with her son, my kids like her. Every time we can get together, we do get together. In fact I have her as my emergency contact, primary contact etc.

I simply don't want to get remarried. Why is that not a realistic position? I am still committed to her.

She has more to lose by remarriage than you since she only has 1 kid, already in college, where you have 2 younger kids and all the obligations they entail and 5 more years before you’re an empty nester. I would expect you to want remarriage and her to be a firm no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Stop wasting her time. Marriage has legal protections.

He doesn’t even want to move in with her. That’s an extreme position.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would be the difference in your relationship if you got married? (Finances aside). Do you live together? Do you spend most of your time together? Are you each other's "other person"?

I guess I've never fully understood why someone is so against marriage unless it's that level of commitment they are against. In which case, that's the issue here. She wants to be more committed/serious than you.

I know I don't ever want to be taken advantage of again. If I want to get out I want to be able to just walk out a door. I dont want my money or health in jeopardy.

What a loser you are. People who love their partners (whether unmarried or married) accept that there will be times when their own health and money will be in jeopardy, while they tend for their loved one. This is what being in a relationship MEANS. The rest is just FWB.

I really hope that one day when you're in need, there's no one to care for you.

Not OP, just random dude taking a break from the political threads.

Same to you...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would be the difference in your relationship if you got married? (Finances aside). Do you live together? Do you spend most of your time together? Are you each other's "other person"?

I guess I've never fully understood why someone is so against marriage unless it's that level of commitment they are against. In which case, that's the issue here. She wants to be more committed/serious than you.

I do not want to be married again because my ex wife made the experience distaetasful. I am not against marriage I am just against marriage for ME. We don't live together. She suggested that at some point but I wasn't enthusiastic about it. I will say we are each other's person. I have a great relationship with her son, my kids like her. Every time we can get together, we do get together. In fact I have her as my emergency contact, primary contact etc.

I simply don't want to get remarried. Why is that not a realistic position? I am still committed to her.

She has more to lose by remarriage than you since she only has 1 kid, already in college, where you have 2 younger kids and all the obligations they entail and 5 more years before you’re an empty nester. I would expect you to want remarriage and her to be a firm no.

OP simply knows he has 10+ years to date and enjoy different women. He will happily remarry after his 55 yo a woman 10-15 years younger

He should stop wasting her time this is taking advantage of her

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stop wasting her time. Marriage has legal protections.

He doesn’t even want to move in with her. That’s an extreme position.

Yea, but already is imposing the household and medical care responsibilities on her by naming his emergency contact for house alarm security alerts. I would say a hard no if my casual date asked me for something like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would be the difference in your relationship if you got married? (Finances aside). Do you live together? Do you spend most of your time together? Are you each other's "other person"?

I guess I've never fully understood why someone is so against marriage unless it's that level of commitment they are against. In which case, that's the issue here. She wants to be more committed/serious than you.

I know I don't ever want to be taken advantage of again. If I want to get out I want to be able to just walk out a door. I dont want my money or health in jeopardy.

What a loser you are. People who love their partners (whether unmarried or married) accept that there will be times when their own health and money will be in jeopardy, while they tend for their loved one. This is what being in a relationship MEANS. The rest is just FWB.

I really hope that one day when you're in need, there's no one to care for you.

Not OP, just random dude taking a break from the political threads.

Same to you...

A man in his late 50s once told me : never date marriage negative people. They are self centered and are looking to take advantage of you. It's better to be single

Moving in together in OP"s case would be even worse for his GF. She will take on the wife's responsibilities with no guarantees

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stop wasting her time. Marriage has legal protections.

He doesn’t even want to move in with her. That’s an extreme position.

Yea, but already is imposing the household and medical care responsibilities on her by naming his emergency contact for house alarm security alerts. I would say a hard no if my casual date asked me for something like that.

Yup. He wants a wife but he doesn't want to be a husband. Hard pass.

[Anonymous]

OP it’s fine to want what you want. But you seem super mad that she’s not totally cool with your world view. She gets a preference on this issue too. The biggest red flag to me is how irritable you sound about not only wanting your own way, but wanting her to agree with you. She may not, and if you actually care about her, you need to be clear with her so that she can use that information to make her own decision, which may be to leave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would be the difference in your relationship if you got married? (Finances aside). Do you live together? Do you spend most of your time together? Are you each other's "other person"?

I guess I've never fully understood why someone is so against marriage unless it's that level of commitment they are against. In which case, that's the issue here. She wants to be more committed/serious than you.

I do not want to be married again because my ex wife made the experience distaetasful. I am not against marriage I am just against marriage for ME. We don't live together. She suggested that at some point but I wasn't enthusiastic about it. I will say we are each other's person. I have a great relationship with her son, my kids like her. Every time we can get together, we do get together. In fact I have her as my emergency contact, primary contact etc.

I simply don't want to get remarried. Why is that not a realistic position? I am still committed to her.

She has more to lose by remarriage than you since she only has 1 kid, already in college, where you have 2 younger kids and all the obligations they entail and 5 more years before you’re an empty nester. I would expect you to want remarriage and her to be a firm no.

Two years later, it seems like she is over her divorce and has fully moved on but he has not. OP cannot be her person while his ex lives in his head.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a late 40s woman. I will never remarry. Hard no. I don’t think it’s common at all for people to change their minds.

But do you date? Have you found someone “prefect in every way?”

Once you do find someone perfect and date for a couple years, then what?

They ask what you are thinking after a couple amazing years?
You tell them marriage is not for you. But this and that. You have your guards up.
Then they reciprocate that.
The closeness disappears.
You break up.

[Anonymous]

Good job, OP. Men, never get married.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She’s looking for a gesture of commitment beyond dating - whether it is legal marriage, moving in together, or buying a home together, or maybe even a non-legally binding commitment ceremony. Something that indicates that you won’t just walk out the door because the fight you both had one day was big. It doesn’t seem like you are ready to commit to her long term.

Gosh women can be so desperate and pathetic. I feel so sorry for OP’s girlfriend. If you don’t see being with me as a privilege, goodbye. 👋

Lovely person you are.

Lovely or not, you’re never going to find me begging for scraps from some man who needs therapy and can’t get over his divorce.