No one is RSVP-ing for my party

[Anonymous]

NP here.

I entertain often. I usually call my guests beforehand to let them know that they are being invited and that I will be sending them the evite. Then I immediately send the evite. My close friends know to respond immediately. Of course, I also send it around a month or 5 weeks before the event itself - which is common in our circle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That's a tough day to commit to.

This is why no one is RSVP’ing. Glass half full: they want to come but can’t commit. So they leave it open ended.

[Anonymous]

OP, If I was your friend, I would love to come to your party, but as of today, my extended family is still settling on a date to get together. If forced, it’s a no.

P.S. I am white so you can stop with your racist judgment. I read your previous post.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m having a holiday party Saturday, the 27th. I sent out thirty invitations last Monday, and asked invitees to RSVP via text by the 13th. So far I have received three responses. Is this normal?

This is terrible and I’m so sorry op! People can be so mean.

BTW, are you BIPOC? Are the people who are not RSVP-ing white by chance?

Thank you! Yes I am and yes they are - how did you know? Haha.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's a tough day to commit to.

This is why no one is RSVP’ing. Glass half full: they want to come but can’t commit. So they leave it open ended.

That would be me exactly. We always have something on that date, a family thing from DH's side but I never know when until closer, maybe the 20th. If I was up to the RSVP deadline though, I would RSVP no. I also believe in my circle, if people don't RSVP, they aren't coming.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry to say that the days/nights right before and after Christmas and after Hanukkah are going to be busy for people. But I hope you get more RSVPs! And unfortunately people are taking longer to RSVP/forgetting altogether more than usual, I've noticed.

+1 Depends on your social circle, but a lot of people will be travelling or have family plans on December 27.

[Anonymous]

Why would you pick Christmas weekend for a party? How inconsiderate. That's why no one is coming. Everyone will be with their family or on the road traveling.

[Anonymous]

If you sent out snail mail invites last week, at least 50% of your non-respondees haven't even noticed the invite yet. I leave my mail in my mailbox for weeks at a time. I usually receive one important piece of mail per year. Maybe two.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Is this people with children, or older people? People with children are all going to be out of town by then.

People just get on here and say whatever, I swear

Do you really know multiple families who will just be home without plans over winter vacation?

Uh, yeah, it's end-of-year close for a lot of people

Most people I know work at offices that close that last week.

The finance team is probably working!

Finance and accounting ALWAYS have to work yet their work is not valued.

Our accounting firm closes that week. It’s a medium sized regional firm.

[Anonymous]

Sorry this happened. That’s not a good feeling. I think it’s a combo of
1) tough time- between Christmas and new years people are either traveling or burned out
2) maybe sending out too early. More than 3 weeks feels far away so I may not rsvp immediately because plans aren’t set
3) I think rsvp by 12/13 is also early.

[Anonymous]

It’s the paper invite. Chances are that it got mixed up among the Christmas cards. Or the bills. Even with the best of intentions, it’s hard to remember to RSVP without a reminder, much less RSVP by a particular date.
We may mourn the loss of a pretty paper invite, but the honest truth is that must people don’t send them anymore. If you’re going to be the outlier, then you have to accept the consequences.

[Anonymous]

I have planned many parties and It's happened to me before. I'd reach out via text or phone call to guests personally a couple of days before the deadline. The personal one-on-one text usually gets people to respond yes or no.

[Anonymous]

This is OP. I appreciate the candid feedback. Most attendees are family/close friends who’ve indicated verbally they’ll be attending. I otherwise sent out the invite to a handful of local acquaintances in hopes they’ll attend.

I hear what everyone is saying on it being a “bad” date. Maybe so. My interpretation of the Christmas season is forgiveness, togetherness and cheer - I did not plan this party to punish people or add to their stress. It’s a party. I throw great parties. I know Covid has made people more comfortable in their digital cocoons than interacting IRL, but our primal selves long for connection. Stop scolding me on the gosh darn date.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I appreciate the candid feedback. Most attendees are family/close friends who’ve indicated verbally they’ll be attending. I otherwise sent out the invite to a handful of local acquaintances in hopes they’ll attend.

I hear what everyone is saying on it being a “bad” date. Maybe so. My interpretation of the Christmas season is forgiveness, togetherness and cheer - I did not plan this party to punish people or add to their stress. It’s a party. I throw great parties. I know Covid has made people more comfortable in their digital cocoons than interacting IRL, but our primal selves long for connection. Stop scolding me on the gosh darn date.

OP no one is saying this here. People are saying that their other IRL plans are in flux around those dates. You sound very condescending.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I appreciate the candid feedback. Most attendees are family/close friends who’ve indicated verbally they’ll be attending. I otherwise sent out the invite to a handful of local acquaintances in hopes they’ll attend.

I hear what everyone is saying on it being a “bad” date. Maybe so. My interpretation of the Christmas season is forgiveness, togetherness and cheer - I did not plan this party to punish people or add to their stress. It’s a party. I throw great parties. I know Covid has made people more comfortable in their digital cocoons than interacting IRL, but our primal selves long for connection. Stop scolding me on the gosh darn date.

OP no one is saying this here. People are saying that their other IRL plans are in flux around those dates. You sound very condescending.

+1 OP-you need to learn to read. No one is scolding you or doubting your ability to throw great parties. They're just saying you picked a party date when other people have a lot of commitments.