ADHD - Break it down for me.
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Anonymous
| Tell it to me straight - what is life like with a kid like this? My son just turned 6, was just diagnosed and started medication, and I have days where I feel like I want to run away. I love him intensely, but I also have moments where he pushes my patience to the limit and I want to run away and never come back. School is a battle. Doing sports or lessons is a battle. "Listen, listen, listen, pay attention, stop doing that, listen, pay attention, focus, stop doing that". I imagine his teachers will be glad to be done with him this year, since this is no doubt what they deal with all day every day, while trying to teach other kids. |
Anonymous
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IME, every kid is different. Teaching guided meditation and relaxation has helped my DC the most. Daily exercise helps some, others more- especially before school. Daily "chore charts" and lists are helpful. Fidgets are helpful.
Closing your eyes, counting to seven while breathing in through your nose, holding for seven and out through your mouth for seven, with your tongue on the roof of your mouth- helps me and him. You have to do more than one breath. Three is a good number to start. If the medication is not helping, go back and try again. Stimulants do not work for my DC, the non-stimulant works. |
Anonymous
| Ha - it will be fine. I really try so hard not to say"oay attention" since I honestly know he cannot. It's like saying walk to someone with no legs - he just couldn't. But it's not a crisis - we do medication and behavior incentives and he is wonderful -of all the things, this one is fixable and OK so don't worry too much. It's his challenge - other kids have other things but this one is understandable and common and not the worst thing at all. GL!! |
Anonymous
| I mean "pay attention" |
Anonymous
|
First, 6 is very young to start medication. We suspected my son at 5-6, but waited until he was almost 8 for a diagnosis and medicine.he takes staterra, the only non addictive ADHD medication.
Second, six year olds are not meant to sit still. Learn to channel his energy and enthusiasm. There are many books on this topic. It's hard. Many days I have yelled at him. But really, I need to learn how to deal better. Fwiw, my son uses a stress ball at school. He squeezes it when he starts not paying attention as a way to bring him back into focus. |
Anonymous
| Medication is a life saver for my son. When he doesn't take it or after it wears off, mine is an impulsive ball of energy who flits from thing to thing and never accomplishes what he sets out to do. I put a lot of systems in place to help him be successful: checklists, a bin by the door for all of his stuff, routines, etc. In school, he had an IEP until mid sixth grade and now has a 504 plan, which are invaluable. I actually love all of the energy, but the impulsiveness really poses some risks for him. |
Anonymous
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These unproven meds change the brain development of such young children.
Anecdotes do not qualify as scientific proof. This is a very HIGH profit market. BEWARE. |
Anonymous
Oh, stop. They've been studying the effects of ritalin for DECADES. |
Anonymous
My life is with a husband, son, and daughter like this. My husband learned good coping skills as a child in an unsupported environment (was not diagnosed till college) but has some self esteem issues that goes hand in hand with not being supported for his issues through childhood. My kids - it seems you never know when some disaster is going to fly out of no where and you need to schedule yet another meeting at school. They are in high school and middle school now. Words of advice: 1) Don't always react in the moment when things go wrong. Life with people with ADHD is not perfect. Pick and choose the battles and it is ok to let them learn from their mistakes. It is not your job to always jump in and rescue them. Some of the best lessons are the ones in which they get that 0 or miss out on an opportunity because then they understand the cost of being unprepared. Practice deep breathing, giving yourself a timeout, or exercise break so you can make a rationale decision of when to step in and when to just let the consequences play out. 2) Try to set up routines and structure in the house to help with organization. Keys and work ID in a bowl (for my husband), keys with a pull out chain in backpacks (for my kids), packing lunches and homework in backpacks the night before, oversized calendars for family activities, individual oversized calendars in bedrooms for kid activities and assignments, always tell them you need to leave 15 minutes earlier than you really do, etc. Planning ahead helps to minimize household stress and anxiety for everyone. You also are teaching coping skills that will help your children as they eventually become adults. 3) Give your kids chores in the house. The most important is keeping their room organized and clean. At a minimum - once a week. However, it helps if they spend 15 minutes per day (making bed - can't tell you how many things get lost in a messy bed) so the chore doesn't overwhelm them. Other chores - emptying and filling dishwasher, vacuuming, folding clothes, cleaning bathrooms, etc. teach them responsibility of keep the whole house clean and keeping things organized. Everyone chips in and it can get done in little time. 4) Stop the hoarding. I don't know if every person with ADHD is like this but my kids have a hard time discriminating what is important and what can be let go. This especially applies to school and their binders. I buy 2 - 3" binders for the year. They then will have a fresh, empty notebook in the new semester and the old one is stored on a shelf for reference. Clearing out clothes either damaged or too small, toys not wanted, etc. helps clear the clutter and maintain an organized environment. 5) Get in the habit of everyone writing down to do lists. I find it helpful to sit down right before bed to make a to do list for the next day so I know what to get started on first thing. For your child, it might be better to do when they get home from school to make a quick to do list of all their homework subjects. 6) Realize with ADHD, they cannot focus for long periods of time but they also procrastinate. My kids eat a snack when they come home, make their lists, then work on homework for 30-45 minutes, take a 20 minute break or do an afterschool activity, come back and do homework, etc. For the breaks, we set timers so they know when break time is over. Hope this helps. |
Anonymous
| OP- If you child has already started medication and his behavior is still the same on meds as off meds, perhaps it is time to try something else. My son's behavior was like night and day once he started meds. The impulsiveness, the constant talking, the inability to sit still and the combativeness about everything nearly went away completely on meds. He is so much more himself rather than his symptoms now. I would talk to the doctor about changing meds if his behavior has not improved. |
Anonymous
Where's your study on six year old children? Thank you. |
Anonymous
Not the pp. but there have been many studies on adolescents that have shown medicating ADHD has no long term benefit. Studies have also shown it is addictive. It can also cause depression. So, why give it to a six year old? |
Anonymous
| Oh my goodness. Please stop, 11:14. Hijacking this thread in order to spout your "insight" is not appropriate. |
Anonymous
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To the PPs who do not believe in meds for kids for whatever reason, here's my message: don't medicate your kids. But shut your judgy and ignorant mouths about my choices. First, I suspect you are not scientifically qualified to offer an actual opinion and second, you cannot walk a mile in my (or more important, my DC's) shoes so you have no idea what our situation requires.
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Anonymous
| For some kids, the long term benefits are 1) not being suspended/expelled from school for impulsive acts 2) having friends b/c w/o meds, they are annoying as hell and nobody wants to be friends w/ someone like that 3) not annoying and exhausting every teacher you have (not to mention exhausting family members) 4) not needing therapy b/c you have no friends and everyone is always avoiding you. The list is endless. |