Is this fair? Or unnecessarily mean?

[Anonymous]

I would drive them both and enjoy the brief one on one with each kid each morning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At less than a mile, both should be walking, unless injured. I can’t believe you’d entertain any other idea.

+1

Walking or biking should be the default.

+2

[Anonymous]

1 ride. Fair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would drive them both and enjoy the brief one on one with each kid each morning.

Snort, teens in the morning and great 1:1 time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We live 0.7 miles from kids' school. Easy walking and biking distance, when that works. (One child has had leg injury that prevents biking now, one has to carry lots of sports equipment, rainy days, etc.)

With back to school, they have to be there in the morning at different start times - one at 8:15 and the other at 8:45.

DH is adamant that "we're not going to run a shuttle back and forth to school all morning" - meaning, that we will offer one ride in the morning and that's it. Obviously, car has to leave the house in time for the first start. DC2 is balking at that, saying it is "unfair" to force an early departure to accommodate DC1. DC2 would get to school a half hour earlier than necessary, or can choose to walk or bike.

Is this reasonable? They are both in high school.

A few questions.

Does the leg injury prevent walking?

Is there an indoor place that DC2 can wait, or would they be outside?

I would not drive my kids under a mile to high school, unless it was pouring rain, in which case I'd make two runs since I assume you can't wait inside during covid, or there was an actual injury. Having said that, I think it depends on how much sports equipment. I have an ice hockey goalie, and I'd expect him to drag a rolling bag 3/4 of a mile. On the other hand, I have a kid who plays the double bass, and I'd probably drive him if there's a day he needed his instrument at school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Fwiw, if someone I knew was driving back home to pick up the 8:45 kid later, I would never respect them again.

I feel just the opposite. If you can't accommodate two short rides, one of which is for an injured kid, then I'd think you're the biggest jerk off ever. This is not a big deal or thing to give in on for a temporary time frame.

I agree. I’d just drive both.

[Anonymous]

Do you mind taking them both at different times? I would do that. If DH doesn’t want to be involved, that is fine. But I would be happy to take the kids at different times.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thank you all for the thoughts. I promise you that DH is not controlling, I am not a jerk and neither of the kids is unusually spoiled! It's just one of those weird situations to navigate as we reenter school after being away for so long.

To clarify, DCs are 9th and 10th grades. 9th grade is starting at 8:15; 10th grade is starting at 8:45. That's a good question about where older kid would wait if on campus early; I had assumed DC could go straight to first class but I don't know that for certain with all Covid restrictions in place. I will clarify that with DC.

9th grader is the one with the hurt leg. It is healing and not expected to be long term problem, but still swells and becomes painful if overused. We are still determining the level of activity that is tolerable.

I worked from home even before Covid so can adjust schedule to haul kids around; however, we bought this house with the specific intent that kids would be able to walk back and forth to school. They both did this through MS (also nearby) with no problem.

[Anonymous]

OP again. And, I should add, 10th grader is the one with most of the sports and other equipment to lug bag and forth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP again. And, I should add, 10th grader is the one with most of the sports and other equipment to lug bag and forth.

How much stuff does he actually need to carry every day?

[Anonymous]

Teen dd gets out of school 10 minutes before ds (same school). She thinks I should pick her up, drive her home, and drive back to get ds. I said no.

In the morning ds starts school 5 min before dd can go in. She thinks she should get to sit in the car for that 5 min. I said no.

Moral of the story: of course they will ask for what is most convenient to them (it is good that they ask!). But you get to say no.

If you can accommodate once and awhile, like on mondays or something, then you are the good guy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP again. And, I should add, 10th grader is the one with most of the sports and other equipment to lug bag and forth.

If he can't carry his equipment 0.7 miles then he has a problem and needs to start working out more. I am a mother of an athlete. Our rule was you carry your stuff. In a good game (soccer, lax, basketball, football) the kids will run a few miles. Your kid should be able to carry his stuff 0.7 miles each way.

I would make them both walk unless the weather is bad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would drive them both and enjoy the brief one on one with each kid each morning.

Snort, teens in the morning and great 1:1 time.

Sorry you have a different experience with your kids. I enjoy mornings with my two teens before we all set off for the day.

[Anonymous]

Isn’t the purpose of the different start times to prevent all the kids showing up at the same time. So you are essentially telling one of your kids to break the rules by showing up early. And risky them getting yelled at. This would really stress out my kid.

If it’s .7 miles, either give them both a ride at the appropriate time or neither one. Unless the leg injury means the kid should not walk. Then you cater to that child.

[Anonymous]

How long is the leg injury expected to be an issue?