Did anyone here NOT have a perfect wedding?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My wedding was far from perfect but I still have fond memories. All of the negative things about my wedding day were other people being lame, whether it was my mom refusing to take off her sunglasses for photos (really) or my boss having a tantrum at me in the middle of the reception.

Other people are wildcards, and big events like wedding sometimes bring out the worst in them. But at the end of the day (1) we got married, (2) most of our friends and family had a great time, and (3) we have a handful of lovely photos and memories. I no longer care about the rest and feel sorry for the people who were too up in their own heads to just enjoy a party someone else planned and paid for.

wow - what was your boss’s excuse?

[Anonymous]

We never saw our limousine. It showed up but one the groomsmen commandered it. He used it to run an errand, we're not sure.

Are you still friends with him? What kind of errand did he run?

We are still friends. We think he went to pick up his dry cleaning. He's a unique one.

[Anonymous]

My mother didn't attend my wedding because she and I hadn't talked since I was in my mid-teens. My father's second wife was being full on Momzilla the entire weekend and screeched at four or five different people for things that were fine with me. Also, she decided one person (an adult, who never drinks, who was in her early 30's, was MISSING, and tried to convince people to call the police. She was exactly where she'd told like three people she'd be. She had no idea she was missing. Momzilla delayed the wedding because of this.

[Anonymous]

The wedding was fine and pretty much went as planned. Most of our moderate budget went to food and the photographer. And my large extended family, which can be prone to drama, was all on their best behaviour. But my dad, who had a degenerative illness, went into hospice about 2 months before the wedding and died about 6 weeks before the wedding, which fell about a month or so before his memorial service. It was an emotionally intense time, and DH got mad on our honeymoon that I wasn't "fun" enough. I have really happy memories of the wedding itself. The rest of that year was a nightmare.

[Anonymous]

The groom got drunk before the wedding and threw up during the ceremony and the cake didn’t show up. We also had a bunch of uninvited guests and ran out of food. If I get married again, I’m going to the courthouse.

[Anonymous]

Once every 17 year cicada invasion. Our outdoor photos involved stepping over a layer of dead bugs. Luckily ceremony and reception were indoors! We laugh about it now and we still had a fun day.

[Anonymous]

Little things went wrong but the only thing I note looking back at pictures was that the dress I chose, with a deep v neck/halter, looked great and not too revealing on my 34b chest, less.so.on my 11 weeks pregnant 34dd.chest day of wedding. (Dh begs to disagree). I think it was obvious to a couple people that I was either pregnant or had gotten a boob job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My wedding was far from perfect but I still have fond memories. All of the negative things about my wedding day were other people being lame, whether it was my mom refusing to take off her sunglasses for photos (really) or my boss having a tantrum at me in the middle of the reception.

Other people are wildcards, and big events like wedding sometimes bring out the worst in them. But at the end of the day (1) we got married, (2) most of our friends and family had a great time, and (3) we have a handful of lovely photos and memories. I no longer care about the rest and feel sorry for the people who were too up in their own heads to just enjoy a party someone else planned and paid for.

+1

PP here. YES! People can be real a-holes. It spelled out what our life would be like, and who to avoid. Talk about a teachable moment - that in itself was worth every penny. So, the a-holes gave us a priceless gift, after all. There were only a few, but they try to put a damper on everything, not just weddings, it turns out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I went to a wedding where the bride's grandmother literally dropped dead in the middle of the dance floor.

Alright, I think we have hit bottom and can shut the thread down. Wow. Doesn't get much worse than that.

It was so awful. She just fell over backwards like a tree, right on the dance floor. One of the guests had EMT training but she was unrevivable. They had all the guests go out into the foyer hall of the facility, and closed the doors until ambulance came and took her away.

I feel so had for the couple... I'm sure every wedding anniversary has a tinge of sadness due to Grandma's death, and every time someone brings up weddings in general.

OMG!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My wedding turned out ok, but my mom was so awful that it ruined it for me.

My parents are divorced and my mom was angry I invited my dad to my wedding.

So my mom tried to convince the entire family that I had been abusive to my mom and grandmother, and therefore nobody should attend my wedding.

So my wedding turned into this weird test of loyalty to my mother vs. Me, and like half my family didn’t attend (including my own sister, my mom, and my grandma). The half that did attend felt obviously uncomfortable and unsure about the whole thing.

Despite all of this, we went forward (we’d already paid everything and invites had gone out), and I for some reason held onto this weird hope that in the end, my mom would find a way to make it right and that she and the rest of my family would attend. I sort of could not get my brain or heart to believe what was happening and I really thought she’d fix things in the days and hours leading up to the wedding. I held onto this belief up until the moment I had to walk down the aisle. My sister was supposed to be my maid of honor and I also believed somehow she’d show up and be there for me. They didn’t.

My mom continued to threaten people who were planning to attend (like her siblings and my siblings) with being disinherited if they attended (mom and grandma are wealthy). In fact, all who attended were disinherited and the ones who boycotted were given cash payments. For one of my uncles this decision cost him several hundred thousand dollars. And I kind of think he regrets coming. I told him at the time it would be ok if he didn’t attend and that I understood. I kind of think he blames me for all of this somehow.

It’s been 8 years and it’s still not something I can laugh about or feel anything but sorrow.

I haven’t spoken to my mother since. My grandmother died a couple years ago and we never spoke again either.

I have reconnected with my sister but the hurt is still tremendous on my side, especially since she’s only given a cursory “I’m sorry, but....” kind of apology.

This is just horrible. I can't imagine being put through all of that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My sister in law (brother's wife) gave a speech about how horrible my mother is. We tried to pass it off like she had been drinking but SIL was stone cold sober.

HAHAHHAHHAHA - words of caution to the other SIL - that is pretty funny! Wish I had that!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Married 25 years ago and I can't remember being nervous about wedding planning- it was a nice wedding but I wasn't looking for "perfect". Now there are TV shows, social media, etc. that put so much pressure on couples getting married.

+1

Honestly, over the decades, the most successful marriages are absolutely the ones that had much simpler and least expensive weddings. I have been to some outrageously expensive weddings with ridiculously short marriages.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Same OP. Lots of family drama. I honestly wish we had eloped too. I was in tears (not of joy) on several occasions on my wedding day.

Same here OP. I try not to think about my wedding.

[Anonymous]

Definitely not perfect, no. Our amazing coordinator quit shortly before the wedding to care for an ailing parent, and the replacement provided was completely inadequate and MIA. No one greeted us when we arrived at the venue, and the seating had been set up incorrectly - coordinator was MIA and we had to fix it ourselves. My hair didn't turn out the way I wanted in spite of looking amazing during the trial. The sound system gave out just as I was ready to walk down the aisle, so I walked down to silence. Also, a guest who was a father figure and a mentor to my husband drunkenly made some rather mean comments to him. We had happy moments and memories too though, and everyone had a lot of fun.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My wedding time was extremely stressful and traumatic. We were a mixed race-interfaith couple and neither set of families were happy about our union. We also did not have money for a wedding. We put something together last minute and it was stressful and just not fun. If I could do it over, I'd have just eloped.

Mixed race couple here too. Awful wedding for the same reason — unsupportive relatives. One of the saddest days of my life. I’ve been burdened with hateful white in laws ever since and the marriage is totally not worth having to tolerate these people’s existence. I do my best to dissuade people of color from getting married to white people now.