Au Pair just asked for more money

[Anonymous]

OP, what are the ages of your kids and are they in real school all day or at home?

[Anonymous]

Obviously, the au pair was expecting kids to be in school when she took the job. That's why OP isn't sharing normal information about the ages of the kids, school schedule, etc.

[Anonymous]

Why will no one answer whether they are permitting these girls to travel in the USA right now? Or does no one want to admit the hypocrisy of the new “all work and no play” (and for the same pay!) reality.

[Anonymous]

What’s the rate in this area?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What ages are the kids and are they in full time school? Or “virtual” school.

Does the au pair have car access and does she get out for socializing?

I also want more details. For instance, what if she accepted a position with 4 kids expecting them to be in school all day and now they are all virtual?

She can work up to 45 hours. Whether that's during or after school hours, the limit is the same.

Is the pay the same for au pairs regardless of the number of kids?

I also think we need a description of her actual work duties right now, and comparison to those pre-covid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why will no one answer whether they are permitting these girls to travel in the USA right now? Or does no one want to admit the hypocrisy of the new “all work and no play” (and for the same pay!) reality.

Since there aren't really travel restrictions, isn't it impossible to prevent your AP from traveling? They aren't slaves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What ages are the kids and are they in full time school? Or “virtual” school.

Does the au pair have car access and does she get out for socializing?

I also want more details. For instance, what if she accepted a position with 4 kids expecting them to be in school all day and now they are all virtual?

She can work up to 45 hours. Whether that's during or after school hours, the limit is the same.

Is the pay the same for au pairs regardless of the number of kids?

I also think we need a description of her actual work duties right now, and comparison to those pre-covid.

Yes, that's the way the program works.

OP, if you are still reading, I think it's fair to expect her to ask for more and for you to pay more-- but not if she's not doing the job well. That said, you should consider that these days she could very easily rematch and decide if that risk is worth it.

I might offer to pay her $225 and then say you'd be willing to pay even more if she excels.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why will no one answer whether they are permitting these girls to travel in the USA right now? Or does no one want to admit the hypocrisy of the new “all work and no play” (and for the same pay!) reality.

Since there aren't really travel restrictions, isn't it impossible to prevent your AP from traveling? They aren't slaves.

That’s my point. So will the au pair families on here please confirm that they are allowing their au pairs to travel, dine out, and do everything else they can, same as before? Or confirm that they have restricted these activities? Because that should definitely impact the compensation aspect.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why will no one answer whether they are permitting these girls to travel in the USA right now? Or does no one want to admit the hypocrisy of the new “all work and no play” (and for the same pay!) reality.

Since there aren't really travel restrictions, isn't it impossible to prevent your AP from traveling? They aren't slaves.

Mine just came back from seeing some national parks. She then quarantined on her floor (bedroom suite etc,) for 4 days wherein we brought her meals. Then we paid for an overnight PCR test. All of which we're happy to do because we understand that's the point of the program.

[Anonymous]

I really hate it when someone asks for advice but then refuses to provide any more details. How could we know if her request for more money is reasonable without more information?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why will no one answer whether they are permitting these girls to travel in the USA right now? Or does no one want to admit the hypocrisy of the new “all work and no play” (and for the same pay!) reality.

Since there aren't really travel restrictions, isn't it impossible to prevent your AP from traveling? They aren't slaves.

That’s my point. So will the au pair families on here please confirm that they are allowing their au pairs to travel, dine out, and do everything else they can, same as before? Or confirm that they have restricted these activities? Because that should definitely impact the compensation aspect.

^^Because without the cultural exchange component, they are really just employees, and should be compensated as such. So, assuming minimum wage, more on the magnitude of $400/week.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I really hate it when someone asks for advice but then refuses to provide any more details. How could we know if her request for more money is reasonable without more information?

Agree

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why will no one answer whether they are permitting these girls to travel in the USA right now? Or does no one want to admit the hypocrisy of the new “all work and no play” (and for the same pay!) reality.

Since there aren't really travel restrictions, isn't it impossible to prevent your AP from traveling? They aren't slaves.

Mine just came back from seeing some national parks. She then quarantined on her floor (bedroom suite etc,) for 4 days wherein we brought her meals. Then we paid for an overnight PCR test. All of which we're happy to do because we understand that's the point of the program.

That sounds very reasonable. But is everyone doing this? OP, are you doing this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Stop filling in the conversation for her. Make her do the heavy lifting:

“You shared that you would like more money. Say more about that. Exactly how much? We’re already exceeding the guidelines of the agency. What’s your reasoning for more?”

Make her do the work of answering.

You can respond with something like “I’m really struggling with this request since I’m not seeing the bare minimum. You rarely play with the kids. There’s no effort to clean up or help out with things like laundry. I’d be happy to revisit this conversation in a month.”

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why will no one answer whether they are permitting these girls to travel in the USA right now? Or does no one want to admit the hypocrisy of the new “all work and no play” (and for the same pay!) reality.

Since there aren't really travel restrictions, isn't it impossible to prevent your AP from traveling? They aren't slaves.

That’s my point. So will the au pair families on here please confirm that they are allowing their au pairs to travel, dine out, and do everything else they can, same as before? Or confirm that they have restricted these activities? Because that should definitely impact the compensation aspect.

Ours understands the situation and of course voluntarily isn't doing stupid things. She's meeting friends outside, using our heat lamps, wearing masks, avoiding public transportation, etc. Of course she's free to do whatever she wants, but we talk about this stuff all the time. I would do the same if my adult daughter were home - talk, make smart choices, be flexible and understanding that she is a young person who needs friends etc.