The house is SHARED SPACE SIL

[Anonymous]

There are 50 other weeks in the year. Pick some of those. This is not an issue.

OP, when your sister breaks down your door in the middle of the night while you're sleeping and shoots you multiple times until you're dead, THAT will be unfair. THEN come talk to us.

[Anonymous]

I’m Team BIL and SIL here. And why are you calling out SIL in title? Of course she should send pics of kids enjoying the property. That is whole point of having a 2nd home - to ENJOY it.

They are using it for 2 weeks. In a 3 month summer if there are three siblings, they should get 3-4 weeks.

And you all are crazy and irresponsible not to have a shared calendar on how to use it. It’s a joint property. They are allowed to use it and (gasp) *enjoy* it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think you understand the meaning of “squatting.”

Mm excuse me. They are there for TWO weeks and it just so happens to be the two weeks OP wanted to be there. They just claim the house for themselves. Why should OP have to give.a.heads.up when they would like to use.it?

It’s two weeks she wanted to be there, but couldn’t. So why does it matter when she couldn’t go anyways?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here.
They didn’t even ask before showing up. Yes, we were slow on the uptake if weeks (we are busy) but who just shows up at a shared property for two weeks and then sends pictures bragging about amazing it is. It is shared space and they should have at least sent a text or email asking if it was cool
For their family to use the property.

You don’t have the backstory. BIL is historically and categorically aggressive over the shared property. He acts and thinks of it as his own private home. Is it too much to ask that he and his family give a heads up to siblings before they go em masse?

It’s not passive aggressive. It’s aggressive. He wants the property and he is squatting.

Learn to show what you have in your first post, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am glad that in this time of divisiveness and we uncertainty, we can all come together around this one issue and agree, across all races, genders, religions, and political leanings, that OP is crazy.

+1

[Anonymous]

Perhaps OP I’d drunk? This is such an overreaction to a two week visit at a shared property.

[Anonymous]

How could there be absolutely no system for signing up? I get to use a family shared property and there is occasional griping but there is a least a spreadsheet for signing up!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You said your husband would have loved.to be there right now. So why didn't he say something weeks ago? Or was he also just planning to go down without clearing it.

Nailed it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here.
They didn’t even ask before showing up. Yes, we were slow on the uptake if weeks (we are busy) but who just shows up at a shared property for two weeks and then sends pictures bragging about amazing it is. It is shared space and they should have at least sent a text or email asking if it was cool
For their family to use the property.

You don’t have the backstory. BIL is historically and categorically aggressive over the shared property. He acts and thinks of it as his own private home. Is it too much to ask that he and his family give a heads up to siblings before they go em masse?

It’s not passive aggressive. It’s aggressive. He wants the property and he is squatting.

I'm so confused. So they showed up and no one else was using it. What's the big deal?

I'd be pissed if I had reserved it for a certain time and they showed up before me and took my time, but you hadn't reserved it, and clearly had no intention to because you also failed to send out a text or email asking if it was cool.

Sounds like you don't want to ask ahead of time, but you expect everyone else to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband and his siblings jointly own a property in a state where none of them live. BIL is a teacher,
As is his wife, and just decided to bring their kids to the shared space for First two weeks Of
Summer. Our family would have loved to be there, but we couldn’t because they were camped out.

SIL texted a picture of their kid frolicking at the property to my husband who is SEETHING that his brother is so aggressive and inconsiderate with his usage of th e shared property.

Maybe you could have checked in with your siblings before decamping with your family?! Would that be too much to ask? Or, maybe SIL, don’t taunt your husband’s brother with YOUR family enjoying the property when you don’t even ASk before you all just take over?

I’m so upset for my husband, who has a long and fraught relationship with said brother, and have to vent somewhere.

Seems like you're seething. Remember you and SIL are in the same boat. You are not the owners. Your DH's are. If one brother has a problem with the other it's between them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Look in the mirror op

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There are 50 other weeks in the year. Pick some of those. This is not an issue.

OP, when your sister breaks down your door in the middle of the night while you're sleeping and shoots you multiple times until you're dead, THAT will be unfair. THEN come talk to us.[/quote

Wtf ? That certainly escalated quickly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Perhaps OP I’d drunk? This is such an overreaction to a two week visit at a shared property.

You don't understaaaand!! They are squatting, they went "en masse"!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am glad that in this time of divisiveness and we uncertainty, we can all come together around this one issue and agree, across all races, genders, religions, and political leanings, that OP is crazy.

You are amazing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Perhaps OP I’d drunk? This is such an overreaction to a two week visit at a shared property.

You don't understaaaand!! They are squatting, they went "en masse"!

Did she expect them to go one by one?