Served with Summons for child custody days before planned trip

[Anonymous]

Is the international trip to a vacation spot or is to a place where you have family and ties?

It seems as though he wants access to his child. He should have some custody so I am not clear if you are fighting that?

If you moved away, that will also come into play.

Did dad give any money before you took this to court last year?

You really need to ask your lawyer. That is the person whose advice matters as they will be the one to have to deal with the fall out. Chances are you aren't going to be able to go on the holiday without dads written permission.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I filed for child support from my kids father and his response has been to file for joint custody. We live in different states and his filing basically halted the child support process all year. I am supposed to be traveling with my kid on vacation in a few days and the papers say I can't travel with the child without permission from him. He will definitely not approve now he has the power to do so, does anyone have ideas on what I can do in 3 days to address this? Hotels and tickets have already been paid for. Thank you.

Do you have a court hearing in three days? Can't you ask the court to give you permission to travel at that time, if you explain that it has happened before and has been preplanned?

No court date in three days. OP wants to travel in 3 days.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just go and say you didn’t get the paperwork til after the trip. What’s he going to do?

He may not have to do anything. It is against the law to take a child out of the country without consent from the other parent. The court will have a record of the date that the summons was served and if she takes her child out of the country, and the ex-spouse says something at the custody hearing, the court has the power to sentence her to a fine or even jail time under federal kidnapping laws. It usually doesn't come to that, but if it is clear that the spouse either had no idea that this was occurring (e.g. you didn't ask permission) or explicitly did not grant consent, the judge often chooses some sentence depending on the situation. In most cases, when the child is returned, and there is no court date pending, nothing happens. But in this case, they already have a custody hearing, so there is a perfect venue for this complaint already scheduled. Very dangerous to do it under these circumstances. I recommend that you communicate with the ex-spouse and if he does not consent, then cancel and reschedule the trip for after the holidays.

But isn't that something that the custody arrangements usually spell out? It doesn't sound like OP and the father of her child were ever married; they don't have any formal custody arrangements or child support in place yet. Are you telling me that there is a blanket prohibition in the law against taking a child on foreign trips without the consent of the bio parent, regardless of the legal arrangement between the parents?

There is a lot of scrutiny of American citizen minor children traveling overseas with only one parent due to international parental kidnapping and also due to human trafficking.

No there is not. I have flown alone extensively with my minor children for the last 13 years. I have never once been asked about whether the children's father consented to the travel.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I filed for child support from my kids father and his response has been to file for joint custody. We live in different states and his filing basically halted the child support process all year. I am supposed to be traveling with my kid on vacation in a few days and the papers say I can't travel with the child without permission from him. He will definitely not approve now he has the power to do so, does anyone have ideas on what I can do in 3 days to address this? Hotels and tickets have already been paid for. Thank you.

I'm really confused how a court filing can impose this requirement. He could ask the court to make that ruling, but it doesn't sound like you've been to court for a hearing yet.

You do need to call a lawyer. If the motion merely requests this from the judge and there's not a ruling on it, then you might be ok with just sending the father and his lawyer a letter stating that you will be traveling to country X as previously agreed to and then go.

But I'd want legal advice before doing that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I filed for child support from my kids father and his response has been to file for joint custody. We live in different states and his filing basically halted the child support process all year. I am supposed to be traveling with my kid on vacation in a few days and the papers say I can't travel with the child without permission from him. He will definitely not approve now he has the power to do so, does anyone have ideas on what I can do in 3 days to address this? Hotels and tickets have already been paid for. Thank you.

Do you have a court hearing in three days? Can't you ask the court to give you permission to travel at that time, if you explain that it has happened before and has been preplanned?

No court date in three days. OP wants to travel in 3 days.

A lawyer could get an emergency hearing tomorrow. She needs a lawyer stat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just go and say you didn’t get the paperwork til after the trip. What’s he going to do?

He may not have to do anything. It is against the law to take a child out of the country without consent from the other parent. The court will have a record of the date that the summons was served and if she takes her child out of the country, and the ex-spouse says something at the custody hearing, the court has the power to sentence her to a fine or even jail time under federal kidnapping laws. It usually doesn't come to that, but if it is clear that the spouse either had no idea that this was occurring (e.g. you didn't ask permission) or explicitly did not grant consent, the judge often chooses some sentence depending on the situation. In most cases, when the child is returned, and there is no court date pending, nothing happens. But in this case, they already have a custody hearing, so there is a perfect venue for this complaint already scheduled. Very dangerous to do it under these circumstances. I recommend that you communicate with the ex-spouse and if he does not consent, then cancel and reschedule the trip for after the holidays.

But isn't that something that the custody arrangements usually spell out? It doesn't sound like OP and the father of her child were ever married; they don't have any formal custody arrangements or child support in place yet. Are you telling me that there is a blanket prohibition in the law against taking a child on foreign trips without the consent of the bio parent, regardless of the legal arrangement between the parents?

If they were never married and he didn’t have custody before, he doesn’t have it now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I filed for child support from my kids father and his response has been to file for joint custody. We live in different states and his filing basically halted the child support process all year. I am supposed to be traveling with my kid on vacation in a few days and the papers say I can't travel with the child without permission from him. He will definitely not approve now he has the power to do so, does anyone have ideas on what I can do in 3 days to address this? Hotels and tickets have already been paid for. Thank you.

Do you have a court hearing in three days? Can't you ask the court to give you permission to travel at that time, if you explain that it has happened before and has been preplanned?

The court hearing is a few months out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I filed for child support from my kids father and his response has been to file for joint custody. We live in different states and his filing basically halted the child support process all year. I am supposed to be traveling with my kid on vacation in a few days and the papers say I can't travel with the child without permission from him. He will definitely not approve now he has the power to do so, does anyone have ideas on what I can do in 3 days to address this? Hotels and tickets have already been paid for. Thank you.

I'm really confused how a court filing can impose this requirement. He could ask the court to make that ruling, but it doesn't sound like you've been to court for a hearing yet.

You do need to call a lawyer. If the motion merely requests this from the judge and there's not a ruling on it, then you might be ok with just sending the father and his lawyer a letter stating that you will be traveling to country X as previously agreed to and then go.

But I'd want legal advice before doing that.

I too am confused about how the papers say OP can't travel without permission from her child's father if the court hasn't weighed on it yet. Just requesting joint custody doesn't mean it will happen, and I don't think this sort of restriction can be imposed by the petitioner. What are these papers and what do they say?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I filed for child support from my kids father and his response has been to file for joint custody. We live in different states and his filing basically halted the child support process all year. I am supposed to be traveling with my kid on vacation in a few days and the papers say I can't travel with the child without permission from him. He will definitely not approve now he has the power to do so, does anyone have ideas on what I can do in 3 days to address this? Hotels and tickets have already been paid for. Thank you.

Do you have a court hearing in three days? Can't you ask the court to give you permission to travel at that time, if you explain that it has happened before and has been preplanned?

The court hearing is a few months out.

If that's the case, I would honestly just go. It will be long forgotten by the time the court hearing happens. It doesn't sound like it's the court saying she can't travel. If it doesn't come from the court, I'm not sure what possible legal importance it might have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is the international trip to a vacation spot or is to a place where you have family and ties?

It seems as though he wants access to his child. He should have some custody so I am not clear if you are fighting that?

If you moved away, that will also come into play.

Did dad give any money before you took this to court last year?

You really need to ask your lawyer. That is the person whose advice matters as they will be the one to have to deal with the fall out. Chances are you aren't going to be able to go on the holiday without dads written permission.

I am visiting a place we both have ties but this is an annual holiday trip. I am a US citizen and well established here.
We haven't lived in the same state in almost 8 years. The only difference is that I moved further away. His engagement with his kid has been inconsistent over the years but became more frequent the year before we moved. His visits were mostly unannounced but made my kid happy so I didn't care. He has also moved quite frequently in the past and I never questioned that because we were not married and the child lives with me primarily.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I filed for child support from my kids father and his response has been to file for joint custody. We live in different states and his filing basically halted the child support process all year. I am supposed to be traveling with my kid on vacation in a few days and the papers say I can't travel with the child without permission from him. He will definitely not approve now he has the power to do so, does anyone have ideas on what I can do in 3 days to address this? Hotels and tickets have already been paid for. Thank you.

I'm really confused how a court filing can impose this requirement. He could ask the court to make that ruling, but it doesn't sound like you've been to court for a hearing yet.

You do need to call a lawyer. If the motion merely requests this from the judge and there's not a ruling on it, then you might be ok with just sending the father and his lawyer a letter stating that you will be traveling to country X as previously agreed to and then go.

But I'd want legal advice before doing that.

I too am confused about how the papers say OP can't travel without permission from her child's father if the court hasn't weighed on it yet. Just requesting joint custody doesn't mean it will happen, and I don't think this sort of restriction can be imposed by the petitioner. What are these papers and what do they say?

Papers for a custody hearing stating specifically that upon receipt of the papers the child in question is no longer allowed to leave the current state of abode without permission. Strange, since the father doesn't live here

[Anonymous]

What makes you think he will decline permission if you asked?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is the international trip to a vacation spot or is to a place where you have family and ties?

It seems as though he wants access to his child. He should have some custody so I am not clear if you are fighting that?

If you moved away, that will also come into play.

Did dad give any money before you took this to court last year?

You really need to ask your lawyer. That is the person whose advice matters as they will be the one to have to deal with the fall out. Chances are you aren't going to be able to go on the holiday without dads written permission.

I am visiting a place we both have ties but this is an annual holiday trip. I am a US citizen and well established here.
We haven't lived in the same state in almost 8 years. The only difference is that I moved further away. His engagement with his kid has been inconsistent over the years but became more frequent the year before we moved. His visits were mostly unannounced but made my kid happy so I didn't care. He has also moved quite frequently in the past and I never questioned that because we were not married and the child lives with me primarily.

These facts make me doubt very much that joint custody will be granted. Legal perhaps, but physical, no. What is the request for, legal or physical?

[Anonymous]

But do talk to an attorney ASAP.

[Anonymous]

^Another reason for OP to have a lawyer look at the papers. A mom in my parenting group was served fake papers by a relative of her child’s father’s new love interest. Guy banging on her door at 11:30 at night and throwing a Manila envelope in her face. That was the first clue. Professional process servers are actually pretty professional. The document inside looked legit, but made some outrageous claims: that she made too much money for CS and if she filed, she would be arrested for fraud. She took it to a lawyer the next day and he tried to find the filing, but couldn’t. The number on it was also not the format used in family court here. Didn’t take much more digging to find out it was completely fake.