Sharing a vacation home with another family - question about choosing rooms

[Anonymous]

Maybe OP would have been fine with and even encourage them having the better master, she was just surprised that ALL the rooms were claimed before she even got there.

It sounds fair for the family with the nice master to get second dibs on the kids rooms, unless kids are toddlers and need to be near parents or something.

But bottom line, if you're going to do this again next year, speak up early on.

[Anonymous]

Why on Earth would you share a vacation house with another family?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP you really have no grounds to be annoyed b/c they did the research and paid the deposit. This is just how everyone we know rolls. It's a lot of work to research and plan. If you want the master without the legwork, then you offer to pay more.

Otherwise you're a mooch.

Agree! Whoever books it and pays the deposit gets first choice!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you really have no grounds to be annoyed b/c they did the research and paid the deposit. This is just how everyone we know rolls. It's a lot of work to research and plan. If you want the master without the legwork, then you offer to pay more.

Otherwise you're a mooch.

Agree! Whoever books it and pays the deposit gets first choice!

If there is a huge disparity in room quality it’s kind to at least offer to alternate, or state your intention as the booking guest you’ll get master. They vacation every year, a power differential isn’t a good idea.


But yeah, I’d prefer to choose if I’d risked deposit. I’ll add too though, I’ve had the technically worst room in a shared house that turned out to have the most privacy and better access to beach/house deck. Sometimes the bitty room works!

[Anonymous]

We have traveled with families where it wasn’t determined beforehand and we got the short end of the stick. The next time we travelled with them, we got first dibs. And so it goes.

Generally the person booking the place gets first pick and I’ve had it where they pay kore for the better room, or it just alternates (so next time, someone else books).

[Anonymous]

It’s very interesting to me that this issue didn’t come up before your trip. Why did you assume that you’d decide together? Maybe the other family assumed all along that they’d have first dibs, regardless of who arrived first. Did you all see photos of the place before you agreed to rent it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We did this before and it was declared/agreed upon just before we booked that the booker was claiming the best room.

"Hey Larla, we're about to book the beach house, just as a heads up we're claiming the master suite--looking forward to vacation!"

If someone sent this to me I would cancel the trip. It sounds so passive aggressive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. This family is like our family and we generally don’t nickel and dime. (We bought groceries; they bought drinks and it may not be even but it’s fine for all). In fact, that’s why I was surprised everything was already decided so I came
here to see if I am unaware of etiquette. Their room is like three times the size of ours but I guess one of us had to get it. And they booked and paid deposit. Now I know and like PP said, I will explicitly say, “let’s pick the rooms once we’re all there,” the next time we vacation together because I do enjoy their company. And our kids like each other. Thanks for validating / acknowledging my feelings. We are paying a ton of $ for this house so I was kind of annoyed.

Next year, you book. And arrive earlier.

Still mention you’d like to alternate next time, do that today.

If they ask, why don't you just suggest you rotate who gets the nice master every other year. Problem solved. Or, they should pay a few hundred more.

Agree, this is the best way to handle it. When planning next year's trip, you say "it's our turn to get the master suite this year, since you got it last year. However, your kids get first dibs on picking their room and then our kids will take the other kid room. We can switch next year."

Take a little, give a little. I'd be annoyed too, since I'm always the planner (and booker) of group trips and usually take the master suite.

Then again, I ALWAYS arrive early to open the house when I'm organizer.

You would be annoyed if someone else took the master because you usually take the master? Lovely.

[Anonymous]

I think the person who books/plans usually gets first pick. I only make requests for things I find to be necessary. For instance, in one house, there was an indoor pool and my kids were the youngest/only non-swimming kids, so I asked they their room be on a different floor than the pool for safety reasons. Otherwise I shut up and am grateful someone else did the heavy lifting with planning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why on Earth would you share a vacation house with another family?

Our thoughts as well. We have a house and witness the shenanigans of this every week for the whole summer. Sometimes it is funny and entertaining other times it sours the all parties for the whole week snd the drinking kicks up a notch or two.

[Anonymous]

We typically only vacation with nice people, and usually we argue over wanting the OTHER couple to have the better room.

The only time we experinced what OP is describing is when we vacationed with my husband's extended family. My inlaws paid and took the master (of course) but my SIL took the second and and third best rooms for her and her children, without discussion or apology. So, not doing that again.

[Anonymous]

and this is why we don't vacation with other families.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:and this is why we don't vacation with other families.

Yep, also my kids eventually get sick of the other kids and I don't enjoy co parenting with people who are not my husband.

[Anonymous]

Person who books gets first choice.

We once shared a house with 2 other families and got there last. The family who had not booked picked a nice room for themselves (fine) and gave their 2 kids the other room with a kings sized bed. DH and I got a room with a full. That was annoying.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:and this is why we don't vacation with other families.

Yep, also my kids eventually get sick of the other kids and I don't enjoy co parenting with people who are not my husband.

+1

Especially because the other family tends to be more "hands off" (call it what you want) and wants us to entertain their kids. Instead we want to ENJOY OUR KIDS - we don't particularly enjoy theirs, we just tolerate them, same as their parents!