bringing toys to the playground and not sharing

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

The movement of "no sharing" came from the notion that "Share!" basically meant giving what you are playing with to someone else. I do not think that is "sharing".

The problems with these various scenes were
1. Kid wasn't even playing with the ball. He just didn't want anyone else playing with it.

2. You shouldn't bring a cool, new toy like a remote control car to the playground if don't want anyone to see it. I'm not saying you have to hand over the control to my kid, but your kid shouldn't be shouting NO IT IS MINE to everyone.

You are very wrong. A child should not have to share. If your kid breaks the toy, will you replace it? They are personal toys. If someone asks to use your phone, is that community property as it’s at the park and will you say yes?

Then I wouldn't LET MY KID BRING IT TO THE PLAYGROUND. If my child brings a truck to the playground, he has to let others see if and possibly play with it. Or, leave the truck at home. You can't bring something and then not expect anyone to look at it or want to see it.

Do YOU share everything you bring to the playground? If you drive there, and I say "Hey, that's a nice car. Let me drive it" you're going to hand over the keys?

"Pretty necklace. Let me wear it" You'll take it off and let me wear it a while?

Weaksauce. A ball is neither a necklace nor a car, and the social proprieties among adults are far different than those among children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's more fun to share. If you want to play with your toys alone stay in the backyard.

Bull. It’s fun to play with your toy how you want to. It’s fun to play catch or frisbee as a family without some neglected kid butting in because his mom didn’t bring anything for him to do and is ignoring him while she is on her phone. It’s fun to ride bikes and scooters by yourself without giving a stranger “a turn”. And some people don’t have backyards. That’s why they go to a park.

So much entitlement here.

We've had several toys and a scooter broken because of parents ignoring their kid and kids think its ok to just take someone else stuff. We learned to guard it and say no. Our stuff is not communal property and parents need to teach kids boundaries. We had friend who had a party and it was amazing to me how many kids came up and just took food without asking and parents didn't seem to notice or care their kids were taking from strangers. What if a kid gets hurt on your bike as they weren't wearing a helmet? Whose liable?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's more fun to share. If you want to play with your toys alone stay in the backyard.

Bull. It’s fun to play with your toy how you want to. It’s fun to play catch or frisbee as a family without some neglected kid butting in because his mom didn’t bring anything for him to do and is ignoring him while she is on her phone. It’s fun to ride bikes and scooters by yourself without giving a stranger “a turn”. And some people don’t have backyards. That’s why they go to a park.

So much entitlement here.

Entitlement = going to a public park and expecting to not have to deal with the public.

Johnny will flip if another kid touches his toy in the sandbox? That’s your opportunity to actually parent. You explain the choices to Johnny: if he doesn’t wish to share a toy, it stays home. He takes to the park only those toys that he’s OK with other kids touching/using for a few minutes. If he has no such toys, why then Johnny goes to the park without.

This is Living in a Society 101, people. It’s not hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's more fun to share. If you want to play with your toys alone stay in the backyard.

Bull. It’s fun to play with your toy how you want to. It’s fun to play catch or frisbee as a family without some neglected kid butting in because his mom didn’t bring anything for him to do and is ignoring him while she is on her phone. It’s fun to ride bikes and scooters by yourself without giving a stranger “a turn”. And some people don’t have backyards. That’s why they go to a park.

So much entitlement here.

We've had several toys and a scooter broken because of parents ignoring their kid and kids think its ok to just take someone else stuff. We learned to guard it and say no. Our stuff is not communal property and parents need to teach kids boundaries. We had friend who had a party and it was amazing to me how many kids came up and just took food without asking and parents didn't seem to notice or care their kids were taking from strangers. What if a kid gets hurt on your bike as they weren't wearing a helmet? Whose liable?

I hope you slapped those nasty little food thieves’ hands! The nerve of those two-year-olds, seeing food and wanting some!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lots of people on this thread are “disagreeing,” but not really. If you bring a toy to a park and aren't using it, you should let others borrow it. If you don’t, which is absolutely your right, you are an asshole (absent special circumstances). It is nice to take turns with others playing with something you bring to the park, but sometimes it’s reasonable not to and you never have to.

Basically, I tell my kids that if they bring toys, they share them. If others bring toys, they ask if they can play with them too/have a turn and take whatever answer they get politely.

In the few instances when toys have been badly broken or disappeared as a result of sharing, I have replaced them (without saying anything about it). I realize that I am privileged to be able to do this, but I don’t want my kids to learn the wrong lesson.

In the few instances where my kids have refused to share, their sibling has gotten a nicer version of the toy. Same deal.

My kids are really good about sharing. Even my 2 year old.

Wow, you punish your kids by getting the sibling a nice toy. You have young kids. So, what if a child takes off with your child's $300 bike and breaks it? You just say ok and are not bothered with having to replace it? Not everyone can just keep replacing things like you can.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

The movement of "no sharing" came from the notion that "Share!" basically meant giving what you are playing with to someone else. I do not think that is "sharing".

The problems with these various scenes were
1. Kid wasn't even playing with the ball. He just didn't want anyone else playing with it.

2. You shouldn't bring a cool, new toy like a remote control car to the playground if don't want anyone to see it. I'm not saying you have to hand over the control to my kid, but your kid shouldn't be shouting NO IT IS MINE to everyone.

You are very wrong. A child should not have to share. If your kid breaks the toy, will you replace it? They are personal toys. If someone asks to use your phone, is that community property as it’s at the park and will you say yes?

If you are concerned about your phone being broken, then you don't leave it lying in the middle of play area. If you do, I'd probably pick it up and look through it to see who lost it, because I'd assume it was an accident and you wanted to be reunited with it. If you then attacked me for touching "your phone" you'd be an asshole.

No, you are holding it and using it. A child walks over demanding it and by the standards here, you should jus hand it over. Its no different than a toy or bike so hand it over. Most of us don't leave toys or bikes laying around and are watching them but kids still just walk up and think they can take them. Its not ok and poor parenting. Just like the cheap parents who will not buy their kids a phone and just expect adults or friends to let the kids use theirs if they need to call their parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

The movement of "no sharing" came from the notion that "Share!" basically meant giving what you are playing with to someone else. I do not think that is "sharing".

The problems with these various scenes were
1. Kid wasn't even playing with the ball. He just didn't want anyone else playing with it.

2. You shouldn't bring a cool, new toy like a remote control car to the playground if don't want anyone to see it. I'm not saying you have to hand over the control to my kid, but your kid shouldn't be shouting NO IT IS MINE to everyone.

You are very wrong. A child should not have to share. If your kid breaks the toy, will you replace it? They are personal toys. If someone asks to use your phone, is that community property as it’s at the park and will you say yes?

If you are concerned about your phone being broken, then you don't leave it lying in the middle of play area. If you do, I'd probably pick it up and look through it to see who lost it, because I'd assume it was an accident and you wanted to be reunited with it. If you then attacked me for touching "your phone" you'd be an asshole.

No, you are holding it and using it. A child walks over demanding it and by the standards here, you should jus hand it over. Its no different than a toy or bike so hand it over. Most of us don't leave toys or bikes laying around and are watching them but kids still just walk up and think they can take them. Its not ok and poor parenting. Just like the cheap parents who will not buy their kids a phone and just expect adults or friends to let the kids use theirs if they need to call their parents.

I can’t imagine thinking another parent is “cheap” because their child asked to use my phone to call home. Or resenting that family for it.

What a pinched, sour, defensive attitude toward life you must have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

The movement of "no sharing" came from the notion that "Share!" basically meant giving what you are playing with to someone else. I do not think that is "sharing".

The problems with these various scenes were
1. Kid wasn't even playing with the ball. He just didn't want anyone else playing with it.

2. You shouldn't bring a cool, new toy like a remote control car to the playground if don't want anyone to see it. I'm not saying you have to hand over the control to my kid, but your kid shouldn't be shouting NO IT IS MINE to everyone.

You are very wrong. A child should not have to share. If your kid breaks the toy, will you replace it? They are personal toys. If someone asks to use your phone, is that community property as it’s at the park and will you say yes?

Then I wouldn't LET MY KID BRING IT TO THE PLAYGROUND. If my child brings a truck to the playground, he has to let others see if and possibly play with it. Or, leave the truck at home. You can't bring something and then not expect anyone to look at it or want to see it.

Do YOU share everything you bring to the playground? If you drive there, and I say "Hey, that's a nice car. Let me drive it" you're going to hand over the keys?

"Pretty necklace. Let me wear it" You'll take it off and let me wear it a while?

Weaksauce. A ball is neither a necklace nor a car, and the social proprieties among adults are far different than those among children.

In other words, you are a hypocrite.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

The movement of "no sharing" came from the notion that "Share!" basically meant giving what you are playing with to someone else. I do not think that is "sharing".

The problems with these various scenes were
1. Kid wasn't even playing with the ball. He just didn't want anyone else playing with it.

2. You shouldn't bring a cool, new toy like a remote control car to the playground if don't want anyone to see it. I'm not saying you have to hand over the control to my kid, but your kid shouldn't be shouting NO IT IS MINE to everyone.

+1

Bring something cheap and expect other kids to want to use it, otherwise - leave your stuff at home.

[Anonymous]

We had this one punk kid (a little older than the other kids, so should have known better) at the playground that would literally take little kids toys without asking, and the nanny didn't care, pretended not to see, and was just happy he was doing something other than bothering her - so yeah, we leave our toys at home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

The movement of "no sharing" came from the notion that "Share!" basically meant giving what you are playing with to someone else. I do not think that is "sharing".

The problems with these various scenes were
1. Kid wasn't even playing with the ball. He just didn't want anyone else playing with it.

2. You shouldn't bring a cool, new toy like a remote control car to the playground if don't want anyone to see it. I'm not saying you have to hand over the control to my kid, but your kid shouldn't be shouting NO IT IS MINE to everyone.

You are very wrong. A child should not have to share. If your kid breaks the toy, will you replace it? They are personal toys. If someone asks to use your phone, is that community property as it’s at the park and will you say yes?

Then I wouldn't LET MY KID BRING IT TO THE PLAYGROUND. If my child brings a truck to the playground, he has to let others see if and possibly play with it. Or, leave the truck at home. You can't bring something and then not expect anyone to look at it or want to see it.

Do YOU share everything you bring to the playground? If you drive there, and I say "Hey, that's a nice car. Let me drive it" you're going to hand over the keys?

"Pretty necklace. Let me wear it" You'll take it off and let me wear it a while?

If you take off your diamond ring at the park and walk away from it, I think you will quickly discover the rules of the playground are even harsher for grown ups.

You will never see that jewelry again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

The movement of "no sharing" came from the notion that "Share!" basically meant giving what you are playing with to someone else. I do not think that is "sharing".

The problems with these various scenes were
1. Kid wasn't even playing with the ball. He just didn't want anyone else playing with it.

2. You shouldn't bring a cool, new toy like a remote control car to the playground if don't want anyone to see it. I'm not saying you have to hand over the control to my kid, but your kid shouldn't be shouting NO IT IS MINE to everyone.

You are very wrong. A child should not have to share. If your kid breaks the toy, will you replace it? They are personal toys. If someone asks to use your phone, is that community property as it’s at the park and will you say yes?

Then I wouldn't LET MY KID BRING IT TO THE PLAYGROUND. If my child brings a truck to the playground, he has to let others see if and possibly play with it. Or, leave the truck at home. You can't bring something and then not expect anyone to look at it or want to see it.

Do YOU share everything you bring to the playground? If you drive there, and I say "Hey, that's a nice car. Let me drive it" you're going to hand over the keys?

"Pretty necklace. Let me wear it" You'll take it off and let me wear it a while?

Weaksauce. A ball is neither a necklace nor a car, and the social proprieties among adults are far different than those among children.

In other words, you are a hypocrite.

No, I’m simply able to reason. Try it.

[Anonymous]

How about some common sense?

If you bring toys to the playground, expect kids to want to play with them. If you are the parent and see that the toys are causing issues, put the toys away. The cost of the toy is also relevant; Id be much more inclined to force my kids to share a ball or frisbee than something expensive like a remote control car. Same goes for my car, cell phone, and wedding ring— the monetary risk of sharing is too high. I also think the comparisons to adults sharing are a little absurd given that adult brains are much more mature and able to handle the concept of not being able to play with something very enticing in a public place. Unlike, say, a toddler.

[Anonymous]

OP here.

Many things annoyed me about the situation. The big one was when the kid (age 5-7) took the ball from my 2 year olds hands “THATS MY BALL” and then put it next to his mom and ran away. He wasn’t playing with it. He wasn’t playing with it when my son found it either. And it wasn’t an expensive ball. It was just a ball.

Don’t bring a ball to the playground, and then yell at kids who touch it. Come on, now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's more fun to share. If you want to play with your toys alone stay in the backyard.

Bull. It’s fun to play with your toy how you want to. It’s fun to play catch or frisbee as a family without some neglected kid butting in because his mom didn’t bring anything for him to do and is ignoring him while she is on her phone. It’s fun to ride bikes and scooters by yourself without giving a stranger “a turn”. And some people don’t have backyards. That’s why they go to a park.

So much entitlement here.

We've had several toys and a scooter broken because of parents ignoring their kid and kids think its ok to just take someone else stuff. We learned to guard it and say no. Our stuff is not communal property and parents need to teach kids boundaries. We had friend who had a party and it was amazing to me how many kids came up and just took food without asking and parents didn't seem to notice or care their kids were taking from strangers. What if a kid gets hurt on your bike as they weren't wearing a helmet? Whose liable?

I hope you slapped those nasty little food thieves’ hands! The nerve of those two-year-olds, seeing food and wanting some!

You do realize kids grow up and get bigger and there is more than just kids being 2.