No RSVP? I’m deleting you from the evite!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don’t be a child. Maybe they forgot. Send them a text.

Bull! They are rude and will probably show up. Delete. I would text her trying her that evite was rescinded.

[Anonymous]

Nooooo don't delete me from the evite I was never invested in. Anything but that!

[Anonymous]

I would do it if it was for something where I needed to do a headcount or get tickets. I’m doing a movie party for my kid next week, and I’m getting a block of reserved tickets on Saturday. If I don’t hear from you by then, I’m not going to be able to fit the kid in, unless the kid wants to sit alone down in the front row. Other than that, I don’t care.

I was so clueless about the not showing up thing, though. When my kid was small, I invited a colleague from work with whom I was friendly and she had a kid the same age. She had been complaining about how long Saturdays were with a kid now that her spouse was deployed, etc. She said she would come, etc.So this was a small house party, and she’s not there when it starts. It’s an hour in, nothing. So I’m holding the cake thinking that her kid would be upset to miss it, so I call her thinking something bad had happened. She just had blown it off and was hanging out at home. I had never heard of such a thing where you don’t call or text (with any face saving excuse) to say you’re not coming. Now, sadly, I’m used to it. People around here appear to have been raised in a barn.

[Anonymous]

You're punishing the children—theirs, and yours who will be disappointed if their friend doesn't show up.

E-vites are kind of tough sometimes, because they do often go into spam folders, or if it's sent to both parents each will think the other answered. Or people just get busy and overwhelmed.

I say don't delete unless you've followed up personally with a method other than the E-vite. If they're on the E-vite, you at least have their email, right? So you can take a minute to send a separate email, just to be sure they got the original Evite.

[Anonymous]

Just checked my SPAM folder, no evites.

If you don't know, click maybe and add an explanation "Waiting on DS baseball make up game schedule."

If you can't make it click No

If you can and your kid wants to go, click yes.

We have had a few maybes were I emailed the host "DS has a makeup baseball game and will arrive late, is that ok?" I have no idea what the plan is or if his late arrival might interrupt something.

We appreciated the early "nos" because we were hosting the party at our house and knew we could only have a certain number of kids. The Nos allowed us to invite some family and other folks that we knew our son would be happy to be there but were not 6 years old and willing to toss lots of water balloons and jump through sprinklers. (shrugs)

[Anonymous]

Evite shows if someone has opened the invite. So yeah if neither parent has opened, it is reasonable to assume it went to spam or was missed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nooooo don't delete me from the evite I was never invested in. Anything but that!

Yeah, except that the day before the party you’re going to realize your kid has nothing better to do and then rudely accept the invitation at the last minute. This isn’t an open house, it’s a birthday party. People don’t want to deal with having to keep extra food and party favors on hand just in case some jerky parent rsvp’d at the last minute or shows up without rsvping at all. It’s just not that hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nooooo don't delete me from the evite I was never invested in. Anything but that!

Too cool for school. Or so you wish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You're punishing the children—theirs, and yours who will be disappointed if their friend doesn't show up.

E-vites are kind of tough sometimes, because they do often go into spam folders, or if it's sent to both parents each will think the other answered. Or people just get busy and overwhelmed.

I say don't delete unless you've followed up personally with a method other than the E-vite. If they're on the E-vite, you at least have their email, right? So you can take a minute to send a separate email, just to be sure they got the original Evite.

It’s not actually polite for a prospective host to badger a prospective guest into an RSVP, or attending. The host has provided their desire and has requested for the guest to attend by way of an invitation. It’s now up to the guest to decide what thy would like to do. Evite even follows up, which should be sufficient. If you KNOW invites are going into your spam, why aren’t you checking your spam once a week? Imagine all the possibilities of other things that go into there!

All these excuses about dance recitals and the like are nothing but lame excuses. No one is planning a dance recital in less time than it takes to plan and put on a birthday party. Sports teams don’t suddenly plan out of state travel games 2 weeks out. If you’re not going to commit because you MIGHT be skiing that weekend, then RSVP no, because the real answer is it’s not important for you to go, and you’re waiting for something better to come along. If y Use worried about family coming into town, is it so hard for one parent to take child to a party and the other entertain the parents? Or if you know that won’t work, just say no.

The “being busy” thing is ridiculous, as pretty much everyone has a smartphone and access to a family calendar these days. Even if you don’t, checking with a spouse should take one or two days, max.

It’s been said on here a million times: an invitation is not a summons. If it’s not that important to you to go, don’t go. Life is reciprocal in many ways - most hosts don’t want to be your B list either.

all these people who are up in arms about hosts refusing people who didn’t RSVP - aren’t you equally punishing the child of the host by not responding in the first place?

As Marie Kondo or whatever her name is, is so big right now... how about reducing other clutter in your life. Holding on to an unanswered RSVP is like filling your closet with sweaters you’re not going to wear.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You're punishing the children—theirs, and yours who will be disappointed if their friend doesn't show up.

E-vites are kind of tough sometimes, because they do often go into spam folders, or if it's sent to both parents each will think the other answered. Or people just get busy and overwhelmed.

I say don't delete unless you've followed up personally with a method other than the E-vite. If they're on the E-vite, you at least have their email, right? So you can take a minute to send a separate email, just to be sure they got the original Evite.

Yeah, you are punishing their children in a way but it’s a consequence of when parents are rude.

I’ll put it to this way. If I don’t pay in time for my son‘s field trip, sports registration or other event with a deadline he doesn’t get to go or participate. It totally sucks for him! Guess who is not going to forget to pay on time next time? Me ! It’s the same thing as a birthday party. It’s about accountability.

[Anonymous]

I think it's the host's fault for not giving an RSVP by deadline date...rookie mistake.

[Anonymous]

Let us know how the party works out and if people who were deleted show up. PP is correct- RSVP by X date otherwise it's a no.

[Anonymous]

oh no! you mean I don't get to drive my kid to a bounce house? I'm crushed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:oh no! you mean I don't get to drive my kid to a bounce house? I'm crushed.

Sorry but this made me LOL. I remember those days and not fondly. The venues are always far flung and the parties, sterile and corporate.

Mom of 3 teens

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:oh no! you mean I don't get to drive my kid to a bounce house? I'm crushed.

Sorry but this made me LOL. I remember those days and not fondly. The venues are always far flung and the parties, sterile and corporate.

Mom of 3 teens

So RSVP NO.

why is this so hard, and fraught with so much drama? Not your thing? Say no!