Is my co-worker flirting with me?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s low key flirting. It’s the baiting/grooming phase where he’s testing you to see how you will respond. If you respond in kind, he will go to the next level. Flirting 101

The responses out here are so weird. It’s almost like people want to deny that you are being flirted with, because no one is flirting with them...

It's funny. I like the low key flirting. Not that anything more than social flirting will happen, but it is an unacknowledged acknowledgement that somebody finds you attractive and enjoyable to be around. I flirt all the time with people at my office, but wouldn't take it any further.

I think you can just continue to be friends OP, and just not worry about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A co-worker has said a few things to me in recent months that have me wondering if he's flirting. I would find it very hard to believe, but... here are a couple of examples:

1) We were working on a very demanding project, and were trading emails over the weekend (exclusively work related). I mentioned that I looked forward to a weekend soon when I didn't have to work. He said, "Yeah I agree. I think we’ll normalize soon. I owe you lunch… and dinner… and breakfast… and whatever else it is you want."

2) We recently spoke on the phone after not interacting for a couple of weeks, and when we were saying our goodbyes, he said something like, "It's good to hear your voice." I wasn't sure what to say so I said, "likewise" and then he kind of giggled. I said "talk to you later" and hung up.

It's possible that someone would say those things in a friendly/platonic manner, right? He's a big networker/relationship builder, so I have always chalked up these instances to that, but the more they happen, the more I wonder.

In the first instance, you instigated it. In the second, doesn't sound like it. Either way you're complicit in it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A co-worker has said a few things to me in recent months that have me wondering if he's flirting. I would find it very hard to believe, but... here are a couple of examples:

1) We were working on a very demanding project, and were trading emails over the weekend (exclusively work related). I mentioned that I looked forward to a weekend soon when I didn't have to work. He said, "Yeah I agree. I think we’ll normalize soon. I owe you lunch… and dinner… and breakfast… and whatever else it is you want."

2) We recently spoke on the phone after not interacting for a couple of weeks, and when we were saying our goodbyes, he said something like, "It's good to hear your voice." I wasn't sure what to say so I said, "likewise" and then he kind of giggled. I said "talk to you later" and hung up.

It's possible that someone would say those things in a friendly/platonic manner, right? He's a big networker/relationship builder, so I have always chalked up these instances to that, but the more they happen, the more I wonder.

In the first instance, you instigated it. In the second, doesn't sound like it. Either way you're complicit in it.

You’re hallucinating.

[Anonymous]

jesus christ, are you serious? It's called being friendly and personable. Get a grip

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:jesus christ, are you serious? It's called being friendly and personable. Get a grip

+1. The fact that you posted this, OP, suggests you are looking for clues that he likes you back. Take a breather.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:jesus christ, are you serious? It's called being friendly and personable. Get a grip

+1. The fact that you posted this, OP, suggests you are looking for clues that he likes you back. Take a breather.

ding,ding, ding!!! we have a winner

[Anonymous]

I hope he is and I hope it leads to a passionate affair sparking another thread. This place is boring lately.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hope he is and I hope it leads to a passionate affair sparking another thread. This place is boring lately.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hope he is and I hope it leads to a passionate affair sparking another thread. This place is boring lately.

+1

+2 I need some interesting drama. I don't care about your snoring husband.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:jesus christ, are you serious? It's called being friendly and personable. Get a grip

+1. The fact that you posted this, OP, suggests you are looking for clues that he likes you back. Take a breather.

THIS!!

[Anonymous]

Op, you are spending a lot of time analyzing this attractive coworker that you absolutely aren't attracted to.

[Anonymous]

He is pre-flirting

[Anonymous]

If you’re not attracted to him, don’t encourage it. If he asks you out, say no.
If just flirting continues and it it becomes uncomfortable, sack up and have a respectful, honest and discrete conversation about it.
If after that it continues, gets worse, or he retaliates professionally, enlist help if possible from HR or equivalent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you’re not attracted to him, don’t encourage it. If he asks you out, say no.
If just flirting continues and it it becomes uncomfortable, sack up and have a respectful, honest and discrete conversation about it.
If after that it continues, gets worse, or he retaliates professionally, enlist help if possible from HR or equivalent.

Seems pretty reasonable.

[Anonymous]

Oh my gosh, no he is not flirting with you! I feel so sorry for men in the workplace today, they really can’t even be friendly or personable without women assuming they are assholes.