asked visiting SIL to take Lyft from airport and caused much drama...

[Anonymous]

I'm sure your rhetoric about having a 1 year old and not being able to do X, Y and Z is more apparent than just this instance, OP. You use it as a crutch to avoid anything that may even slightly inconvenience--even when someone is flying across the country to visit you. You are the most obnoxious, self-absorbed type of IL/parent.

[Anonymous]

That a year later this event still lives reveals an incredible immaturity and selfishness.

[Anonymous]

My family lives on the west coast, and they almost always either arrive or depart at times that are incredibly inconvenient for me to drive to the airport.

Frankly, OP's sister was inconsiderate in booking her flight into BWI and not either of the airports in VA that are both more proximate to where OP lives in Arlington. If it had been a quick trip over to Dulles or National, it would have been an easier trip for the host. When I go see my family in San Francisco, I don't demand that they come pick me up in Oakland. If I need to fly into Oakland for timing or ticket pricing reasons, I factor the cost of getting from Oakland to San Francisco into my calculations. When my mom goes to see my sister in New York, she doesn't fly into Newark and expect my sister to drive there from Brooklyn.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You're living my life!

My SIL said, "my flight gets in at 6:15am but because it's so early I can take an Uber if you want." I said if you don't mind taking an Uber, that'd be great and I'd reimburse.

That was, apparently, the WRONG answer to that statement. My MIL has not let me forget it once. She was on the phone with my husband before my SIL even arrived at our house about how rude we were being. Now when my MIL comes to visit, no matter what time her flight gets in, she'll passive aggressively say, "I get in at 2 PM but I'll just Uber since it's probably going to be too much work for you to pick me up." And then we have to go through the motions of "begging" her not to do that and tell her how happy we are to pick her up. It's total BS. My SIL wasn't even upset about having to take the Uber. She texted her mom (my MIL) that she'd arrived and was in the Uber to our house and MIL flipped out that we didn't choose to pick her up instead. Five years I've dealt with this BS it since that fateful mistake.

I would just let the old bat take Uber then.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're living my life!

My SIL said, "my flight gets in at 6:15am but because it's so early I can take an Uber if you want." I said if you don't mind taking an Uber, that'd be great and I'd reimburse.

That was, apparently, the WRONG answer to that statement. My MIL has not let me forget it once. She was on the phone with my husband before my SIL even arrived at our house about how rude we were being. Now when my MIL comes to visit, no matter what time her flight gets in, she'll passive aggressively say, "I get in at 2 PM but I'll just Uber since it's probably going to be too much work for you to pick me up." And then we have to go through the motions of "begging" her not to do that and tell her how happy we are to pick her up. It's total BS. My SIL wasn't even upset about having to take the Uber. She texted her mom (my MIL) that she'd arrived and was in the Uber to our house and MIL flipped out that we didn't choose to pick her up instead. Five years I've dealt with this BS it since that fateful mistake.

What? Don't go along with her passive-aggression.

When she suggests taking an Uber, just say, "ok!" and that you're looking forward to seeing her.

Please. Who has time for the passive aggressive BS. Every time she tries to do this crap, just let it go right over your head, give a big smile and say thank you!

[Anonymous]

Your DH could have picked her up rather than just taking your suggestion and now blaming you. If I was arriving somewhere at 6am Lyft would be the perfect solution. Just accept that some people are just drama queens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm sure your rhetoric about having a 1 year old and not being able to do X, Y and Z is more apparent than just this instance, OP. You use it as a crutch to avoid anything that may even slightly inconvenience--even when someone is flying across the country to visit you. You are the most obnoxious, self-absorbed type of IL/parent.

You're either an idiot or the SIL.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're living my life!

My SIL said, "my flight gets in at 6:15am but because it's so early I can take an Uber if you want." I said if you don't mind taking an Uber, that'd be great and I'd reimburse.

That was, apparently, the WRONG answer to that statement. My MIL has not let me forget it once. She was on the phone with my husband before my SIL even arrived at our house about how rude we were being. Now when my MIL comes to visit, no matter what time her flight gets in, she'll passive aggressively say, "I get in at 2 PM but I'll just Uber since it's probably going to be too much work for you to pick me up." And then we have to go through the motions of "begging" her not to do that and tell her how happy we are to pick her up. It's total BS. My SIL wasn't even upset about having to take the Uber. She texted her mom (my MIL) that she'd arrived and was in the Uber to our house and MIL flipped out that we didn't choose to pick her up instead. Five years I've dealt with this BS it since that fateful mistake.

I would just let the old bat take Uber then.

Agreed. Why do people give in to these games just because it's your relatives? Don't play along!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You and your husband didn’t seem particularly hospitable to her after she came out of her way to see you. Actions have consequences, as we are fond of saying around here.

Is the “drama” now that she doesn’t want to travel to see you again but you think she should because she’s single (why did you even include that in your description)?

Why is it not hospitable to pick her up at an ungodly hour. They paid for the cab!

[Anonymous]

Wrong or right, it was so minor and OVER A YEAR ago. Geez.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do not understand what is with getting picked up at the airport. Unless you are picking up a child who needs a car seat, I see zero reason why anyone should ever do this. It is incredibly easy and cheap to take a cab.

+1. I am so happy to just hop in a cab/uber and get on my way fast.

[Anonymous]

I go out of my way to visit my relatives when I want to. I would never expect someone to pay for me to visit them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do not understand what is with getting picked up at the airport. Unless you are picking up a child who needs a car seat, I see zero reason why anyone should ever do this. It is incredibly easy and cheap to take a cab.

+1. I am so happy to just hop in a cab/uber and get on my way fast.

Same here. I can't tell you how many times I've taken a cab or train to/from the airport. I've even had my 78 yo mother from the rural midwest take an Uber! No issues!

[Anonymous]

Sounds awful

I never ask people to pick me up and always Uber.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You had 2 adults in the home?

Why couldn't one of you gone to pick up SIL?

And by 1 years old, a baby generally sleeps in at least a 6 hour block of time. It is not like you have a newborn nursing every 3 hours.

Frankly, the sleep thing probably sounded like a cop out given the age of your baby.

Maybe apologize to SIL under the guise of "new parents". A direct apology might go a long way towards mending fences.

There's nothing wrong with paying for a driver to pick up a relative. Getting to an airport at an inconvenient hour is a pain, and a trained professional is often better at transporting people. You sound like you lack both empathy and perspective.

In an emergency, yes.

A scheduled visit? You go pick up family.

OPs husband should have gotten her sister she paid a lot of money to fly in for a weekend.

They owe her an apology

That’s your opinion. Not a rule. I have a job. I have kids. There are days I can either play taxi (which I’m not particularly good at) or I can get the work done for my job or take my kid to the doctor so I can spend more time with my guest. Time in the car is not quality time with a guest and with the exception of overseas guests who may not understand Lyft/Uber, I avoid airport pick ups.