Embarrassed by trashy in laws

[Anonymous]

OP, I am embarrassed by my wealthy in-laws. FIL is a brash New Yorker, flaunts money, is rude to wait staff, and has to be at the center of any party.

I was raised blue-collar and to be more modest.

Don’t worry, you will embarrass your kids’ spouse some day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You love your spouse? How did s/he not wind up the same as their parents?

Yeah I love my spouse. I’m realizing he’s not that different from them. He gets too drunk too and gets wobbly; thinks climate change is real and liberal arts degrees are useless.

He has other "attributes" you find irresistible?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You love your spouse? How did s/he not wind up the same as their parents?

Yeah I love my spouse. I’m realizing he’s not that different from them. He gets too drunk too and gets wobbly; thinks climate change is real and liberal arts degrees are useless.

Well, then he's not all bad. Liberal arts degrees were created for schools to make $$ off of morons who couldn't handle a real degree.

“Off of?” Your “real degree” has failed you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Physically unappealing women have a.narrow range of romantic choices. Trailer trash in laws might be.better than cats.

I’m not that ugly though. I just picked poorly.

You’re ugly on the inside, and that’s ugly enough.

Keep grasping at those straws. It’s such a good look. Grasp, grasp, grasp.

[Anonymous]

They’re rowdy drunks Problem. DCUM prefers chatty wine moms, cliquey frose guzzlers, or pontificating Big Law single-malt pounders.

MIL has been thrown out of restaurants for being too drunk Problem. MIL needs to choose a better class of restaurant. Some place like Millie's or Cafe Milano (God rest its soul), where they're happy to tolerate anything if the price or patron is right.

husbands uncle was a porn photographer Problem. Husband's uncle needs to introduce himself as an avant-garde artist instead.

MIL and FIL do not have college degrees
they’re so narrow minded and uneducated
education is for elitist snobs
Hmmm. Wonder why on earth they'd think that...

they read conspiracy theories Problem. At least pronounce the term properly: "Thuh GAR-dee-ann"

think climate change is fake Problem. Don't let them bequeath you their Ocracoke beach house, no matter how much you want to casually mention to your friends that you're heading to "our old family cottage" for August.

How the f*ck did I end up there? Those of us with liberal arts degrees might suggest a lack of valuable critical thinking, analytic, and communication skills, combined with an inability to consider the perspectives and values of groups and experiences other than our own, and a focus on external trappings rather than appreciating the importance of the life of the mind, but what do we know?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They’re rowdy drunks Problem. DCUM prefers chatty wine moms, cliquey frose guzzlers, or pontificating Big Law single-malt pounders.

MIL has been thrown out of restaurants for being too drunk Problem. MIL needs to choose a better class of restaurant. Some place like Millie's or Cafe Milano (God rest its soul), where they're happy to tolerate anything if the price or patron is right.

husbands uncle was a porn photographer Problem. Husband's uncle needs to introduce himself as an avant-garde artist instead.

MIL and FIL do not have college degrees
they’re so narrow minded and uneducated
education is for elitist snobs
Hmmm. Wonder why on earth they'd think that...

they read conspiracy theories Problem. At least pronounce the term properly: "Thuh GAR-dee-ann"

think climate change is fake Problem. Don't let them bequeath you their Ocracoke beach house, no matter how much you want to casually mention to your friends that you're heading to "our old family cottage" for August.

How the f*ck did I end up there? Those of us with liberal arts degrees might suggest a lack of valuable critical thinking, analytic, and communication skills, combined with an inability to consider the perspectives and values of groups and experiences other than our own, and a focus on external trappings rather than appreciating the importance of the life of the mind, but what do we know?

Tee hee. Spot on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've broken up with girls because their families were white trash.

Smart

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So I don’t know how to say this. But I’m really embarrassed by my association with my in laws. They’re rowdy drunks; MIL has been thrown out of restaurants for being too drunk; husbands uncle was a porn photographer; MIL and FIL do not have college degrees; they’re so narrow minded and uneducated; they read conspiracy theories and think climate change is fake and education is for elitist snobs.

How the f*ck did I end up there?

YOU MARRIED THEIR SON

Sure, maybe you didn't know about the uncle beforehand, but everything else you knew before you got married.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You love your spouse? How did s/he not wind up the same as their parents?

Yeah I love my spouse. I’m realizing he’s not that different from them. He gets too drunk too and gets wobbly; thinks climate change is real and liberal arts degrees are useless.

So really you're embarrassed by your trashy husband. That should have been your title. The in-laws are a non-issue.

[Anonymous]

I kind of get it OP. My in-laws aren’t “trashy,” but they’re pretty simple, provincial, and unsophisticated. They’re also very loving, loyal, and generous - far more than my family of snobs - so you take the good with the bad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I am embarrassed by my wealthy in-laws. FIL is a brash New Yorker, flaunts money, is rude to wait staff, and has to be at the center of any party.

I was raised blue-collar and to be more modest.

Don’t worry, you will embarrass your kids’ spouse some day.

This goes for all of us,# and our kids' spouses will be embarrassing to us. Let's hope they marry someone of equivalent trashiness to our level of trashy (which we all think is rather minimal no matter where we are on the spectrum, kind of like everyone is middle class)

[Anonymous]

I too am embarrassed by my ILs but for different reasons.
I don't care about college degrees or what kind of job someone has, but rude/entitled behavior and things like leaving extremely stingy tips really bother and embarrass me.

I would have never married my DH if I saw that type of behavior from him. Over the years I have noticed certain things that he thought were normal that I did not and we had to reconcile those differences but overall, despite being raised by these people he managed to recognize how cringey the behavior is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You love your spouse? How did s/he not wind up the same as their parents?

Yeah I love my spouse. I’m realizing he’s not that different from them. He gets too drunk too and gets wobbly; thinks climate change is real and liberal arts degrees are useless.

Climate change is real. Some liberal arts degrees are useless.

Agree with PP. Liberal Arts degree is not useless only if you have a trust fund to support you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You love your spouse? How did s/he not wind up the same as their parents?

Yeah I love my spouse. I’m realizing he’s not that different from them. He gets too drunk too and gets wobbly; thinks climate change is real and liberal arts degrees are useless.

From this response alone they should be embarrased if you. You are ignorant. Maybe it's to your advantage they get drunk and don't notice how ignorant you are.

How exactly is the OP ignorant??
Don't make baseless claims back up your words.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would find them incredibly and endlessly fun and exciting. I have a Ph.D from Ivy, come from a good family (by your standards), know how to perform when the situation calls for refined sensibilities, and I'm a democrat. They would crack me up. Spice of life.

Yeah, it's really exciting... I'm sure you'd love your kids watching their loud, foul mouthed grandparents getting kicked out of restaurants because they're too drunk and belligerent.
You'd never be able to leave your kids for a weekend at their grandma & grandpa's house, without worrying that they may forget about her or get arrested while they're out for lunch with her.

If that's what you consider endlessly fun & exciting, don't have children -- you don't have good judgment.