An honest answer from straight men, please.

[Anonymous]

"Kid, you've got sass. I hate sass." -- Lou Grant

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As I man with a kink (that stared when I was 15 or 16) for saggy boobs, stretch marks, unshaven between legs and small muffin tops; my DW is definitely becoming more attractive as she approaches 40.

My kink is women with feeding tubes. I'm going to have to wait another 40 years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What exactly is "sass" in a 40+ yr old woman? Trying to picture this and all
I can think of is 5 yr old girls with smart mouths who defy their teachers.

Examples, please?

I see sassy types in DC-area coffee shops regularly. Usually sitting across a table from a more docile friend. Running off her mouth at a louder than desirable level. Mostly complaining about one thing or another, often the most trifling thing. Occasionally taking a bite of a muffin and letting a couple crumbs fly when she starts talking again. Not letting her friend speak much. A little pudgy. Flyaway hair with a touch of gray.

Nailed it. And if she's like that in public, just imagine how obnoxious she is in private.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What exactly is "sass" in a 40+ yr old woman? Trying to picture this and all
I can think of is 5 yr old girls with smart mouths who defy their teachers.

Examples, please?

My type of sass is playful. I have a quiet demeanour, but I like giving a good zinger every once in awhile for a reaction. Banter turns me on so much. Banter = sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What age?

I am 44. I know I am still attractive but I feel sad that I will get older but my mind, sass, and humour will stay the same. Does that even matter?

Sort of like high school girls, eh? I get older, they stay the same age!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Kid, you've got sass. I hate sass." -- Lou Grant

LOL. I remember that! Great line delivered as only he could.

[Anonymous]

Because no one goes up to someone they first meet and say - wow your personality is hot.

Without physical attraction there is a big component missing as the physical part of the relationship will suffer.

Men are visual creatures. Also I might ask why women are so fixated on how much a guy earns.

[Anonymous]

Sexiness is a combination of attitude and looks. One can be average looking but if they are also playful, fun, open minded and sexually adventerous, it makes them much more attractive.

Also, speaking for myself as a 42 year old man, my taste in what I find attractive ages with me. 40 seemed old when I was in my 20s, now it seems hot. As do attractive 50 year old women.

The thing is, almost all women in their early 20s are attractive, whereas people need to work on it as they age. Same for men, too.

My wife is 42, she is still very attractive to me. I don't care about the superficial wrinkles.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Straight man here. I think there's a basic level of physical attraction that's necessary for me to put forth the effort to get to experience your personality, which takes a long time (weeks, months, maybe even years) to get to know. I suppose different people have different standards for physical attraction, and those standards change over time as people evolve. It's your physical attraction that will make me want to start a relationship, but it's your personality that's going to make me want to stay in a long-term relationship with you. I've been in relationships with women I found physically attractive, but they ultimately ended when I reached the limit of personality attraction. I can think of a couple situations I've been in where I did not find a woman physically attractive, but got to find her personality attractive after getting to know her; but those never blossomed into romantic relationships because we'd become friends by that time and it's hard to get in sync to shift over from friendship to a romantic relationship.

So no, in my experience, men are not "fixated" on physical attractiveness at all. It's just an attractant, as the word suggests.

Do you really think most women are any different?

+1 Married over 35 years. I still find my wife physically attractive and I am happily married. My wife was much more attractive than me when we met (solid 9.5, me 7) but when I see her, I do not see the just the physical. We are a great team. We solve problems together and laugh and have fun. We have a history and she is still crazy about me, even though she really knows me . I am not attracted to 20 somethings, my daughter's age. (To me, Steven Tyler, Billy Joel with young women make them look like desperate, old fools.) And the older women with the duck lips and frozen faces-hell no.
My wife never smoked, doesn't drink and is healthy, but not particularly skinny or fit. But I see her eyes sparkle when she smiles and when she looks at me, and that is hot.

This is beautiful, thanks

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because no one goes up to someone they first meet and say - wow your personality is hot.

Without physical attraction there is a big component missing as the physical part of the relationship will suffer.

Men are visual creatures. Also I might ask why women are so fixated on how much a guy earns.

Perhaps because women earn $.79 to every dollar a man earns? Perhaps because women's career opportunities are limited by sexual harassment, exclusion from professional and social networks critical to career success, increased emphasis on youth and appearance for succes at work, poor maternity leave options, and poor work/life balance options?

Our liberation could benefit you in so many ways, not least of which is that you could be loved for who you are not what you earn.

BTW, FWIW, women are less fixated today on what me earn than they were, in say, Jane Austen's time, perhaps because we have some access to work ourselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because no one goes up to someone they first meet and say - wow your personality is hot.

Without physical attraction there is a big component missing as the physical part of the relationship will suffer.

Men are visual creatures. Also I might ask why women are so fixated on how much a guy earns.

Perhaps because women earn $.79 to every dollar a man earns? Perhaps because women's career opportunities are limited by sexual harassment, exclusion from professional and social networks critical to career success, increased emphasis on youth and appearance for succes at work, poor maternity leave options, and poor work/life balance options?

Our liberation could benefit you in so many ways, not least of which is that you could be loved for who you are not what you earn.

BTW, FWIW, women are less fixated today on what me earn than they were, in say, Jane Austen's time, perhaps because we have some access to work ourselves.

Huge turnoff: you whining about the bullshit "wage gap" which has been thoroughly debunked.

Enjoy your liberation -- and especially, your cats.

[Anonymous]

Perhaps because women's career opportunities are limited by sexual harassment, exclusion from professional and social networks critical to career success, increased emphasis on youth and appearance for succes at work, poor maternity leave options, and poor work/life balance options?

You left out CO2 levels, Darfur and Syria, if you're going to mention various problems in the world that have to do with dating a guy. We don't really care about your resume. If you're unhappily single, perhaps you should care less about your date's.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What age?

I am 44. I know I am still attractive but I feel sad that I will get older but my mind, sass, and humour will stay the same. Does that even matter?

Humor and sass and fun are very attractive.

M,52

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because no one goes up to someone they first meet and say - wow your personality is hot.

Without physical attraction there is a big component missing as the physical part of the relationship will suffer.

Men are visual creatures. Also I might ask why women are so fixated on how much a guy earns.

Perhaps because women earn $.79 to every dollar a man earns? Perhaps because women's career opportunities are limited by sexual harassment, exclusion from professional and social networks critical to career success, increased emphasis on youth and appearance for succes at work, poor maternity leave options, and poor work/life balance options?

Our liberation could benefit you in so many ways, not least of which is that you could be loved for who you are not what you earn.

BTW, FWIW, women are less fixated today on what me earn than they were, in say, Jane Austen's time, perhaps because we have some access to work ourselves.

The .79 cent myth has been debunked many times over

[Anonymous]

My guess -- "Lots of Sass" = "Lots of Ass"

Skinny & sassy is OK.

Skinny & most things is OK...