My son is delusional. Where does this arrogance come from?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: Why is it so important to you to pop his bubble? That is what is weird about this post, frankly. Kids his age rarely perceive the world in realistic terms. Why would they? They are CHILDREN.

You need to concentrate on why this aggravates YOU so much. Because is sounds like something that should make you love him more, not less.

If someone is delusional about their abilities and stature, how will they know to improve? Do you offer your friend with bad breath a piece of gum?

Because there is a difference between being delusional and being 13. I don't offer someone a piece of gum if they just woke up 2 seconds ago and have stale breath. I wait for them to get out of bed and brush their teeth. Just like you need to wait for your son to grow up 2, 3, or 5 years. See the analogy?

OP's kid is clearly a high schooler. Junior or senior.

And?

[Anonymous]

There's a 12 year old boy at my kid's bus stop and while he is obviously several years younger than OP's son, he does tend to arrive there daily bragging about something that isn't worth bragging about. It's frequently a score on a video game that nobody has ever heard of and he just walks up and goes on and on about it even though it's clear the other kids could not care less. He also brags about how much his clothes impress the "ladies" at school which I think it mighty weird for a kid in any grade. Anyway, OP's description reminds me of this kid. I don't know if there's anything wrong with him but everyone sees him as a "little off". I think some kids are just like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your son doesn't have autism.
Your son isn't bipolar or any other disorder.
Your son is like the vast majority of 17/18 year old boys I have met, all of whom grew up into great men.

OP's son sounds nothing like my 17 year old son, who has always been reasonably socially astute. His friends are not like this either. Done some boneheaded things along the way, sure, but they try hard not to do anything that could invite mockery. I'm not clear on why people are getting down on the OP. I think it's a great idea to work with him on these issues before he goes off to college. I'm guessing a lot of you don't have high schoolers?

I also think everyone talking about their clueless DHs would feel some gratitude to a parent who realized their child had a self awareness problem and tried to help him wok on it.

The irony.

Clearly your son doesn't get his maturity and self-awareness from you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your son doesn't have autism.
Your son isn't bipolar or any other disorder.
Your son is like the vast majority of 17/18 year old boys I have met, all of whom grew up into great men.

OP's son sounds nothing like my 17 year old son, who has always been reasonably socially astute. His friends are not like this either. Done some boneheaded things along the way, sure, but they try hard not to do anything that could invite mockery. I'm not clear on why people are getting down on the OP. I think it's a great idea to work with him on these issues before he goes off to college. I'm guessing a lot of you don't have high schoolers?

I also think everyone talking about their clueless DHs would feel some gratitude to a parent who realized their child had a self awareness problem and tried to help him wok on it.

I have 4 boys 2 are young men in their 20s the others are still at home, what OP describe doesn't sound all that different from my oldest two at that age, nor does it sound different from my brothers, cousins, and friends at that age all of them grew up into well adjusted men.

Including DH who is a dream husband.

[Anonymous]

OP's going to have a son who hates her and needs therapy for the rest of her life if she's a real person and not a troll. We get it, OP. You hate your son. No need to make it so obvious to him and burst his bubble. Let him live and leave him alone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your son doesn't have autism.
Your son isn't bipolar or any other disorder.
Your son is like the vast majority of 17/18 year old boys I have met, all of whom grew up into great men.

OP's son sounds nothing like my 17 year old son, who has always been reasonably socially astute. His friends are not like this either. Done some boneheaded things along the way, sure, but they try hard not to do anything that could invite mockery. I'm not clear on why people are getting down on the OP. I think it's a great idea to work with him on these issues before he goes off to college. I'm guessing a lot of you don't have high schoolers?

I also think everyone talking about their clueless DHs would feel some gratitude to a parent who realized their child had a self awareness problem and tried to help him wok on it.

The irony.

Clearly your son doesn't get his maturity and self-awareness from you.

Again, do you have high schoolers?

I certainly don't take credit for my son's personality or the things he's good at, but I have stepped in to help when he or his siblings have started down what seems to be a bad path. I'd hope most parents would have enough empathy for their kids, and enough recall of how fraught the teen years can be to want to do the same. I assume OP is not actually telling her son that he's arrogant, delusional, and average but instead is just seeking anonymous advice on how to help him to stop acting in a way that can come back to haunt him. What's wrong with that?

[Anonymous]

Taking pictures with girls to look like "the man" is creepy and desperate. Talking about your success in a cringeworthy way when you haven't accomplished anything is lacking self-awareness and desperate.

Low social IQ.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like an insecure and desperate kid who's thirsty for attention.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your son doesn't have autism.
Your son isn't bipolar or any other disorder.
Your son is like the vast majority of 17/18 year old boys I have met, all of whom grew up into great men.

OP's son sounds nothing like my 17 year old son, who has always been reasonably socially astute. His friends are not like this either. Done some boneheaded things along the way, sure, but they try hard not to do anything that could invite mockery. I'm not clear on why people are getting down on the OP. I think it's a great idea to work with him on these issues before he goes off to college. I'm guessing a lot of you don't have high schoolers?

I also think everyone talking about their clueless DHs would feel some gratitude to a parent who realized their child had a self awareness problem and tried to help him wok on it.

The irony.

Clearly your son doesn't get his maturity and self-awareness from you.

Again, do you have high schoolers?

I certainly don't take credit for my son's personality or the things he's good at, but I have stepped in to help when he or his siblings have started down what seems to be a bad path. I'd hope most parents would have enough empathy for their kids, and enough recall of how fraught the teen years can be to want to do the same. I assume OP is not actually telling her son that he's arrogant, delusional, and average but instead is just seeking anonymous advice on how to help him to stop acting in a way that can come back to haunt him. What's wrong with that?

Because I don't think like you, I can't have high schoolers? Again with the irony.

I do have high schoolers as well as older children, I assure you OP's kid is not an anomaly, and those kids turn out fine, kids with parents like you and tend to have issues down the road.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like an insecure and desperate kid who's thirsty for attention.

Like a lot of kids his age. Having a parent like OP hellbent on pointing out his every "flaw" doesn't help matters.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He's going through this phase where he thinks he's God's gift. It's obnoxious and I feel like it could get him tormented at school, likely behind his back. He posts pictures with girls from school but their body language suggests they're sort of repelled away from him.

Yesterday he made some attention seeking post on Facebook about how thankful he was for everyone that has made him "so successful up to this point in my life." Honestly, it made me cringe. That's something a kid who just got into Harvard might say or a kid that just got a football scholarship to Alabama. By every metric he's average.

Poor. poor OP!

Son isn't going to Harvard and isn't the star QB like daddy wanted.

It's hard. I'm sure if you go over to special parenting concerns they can help you and maybe even suggest a support group.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your son doesn't have autism.
Your son isn't bipolar or any other disorder.
Your son is like the vast majority of 17/18 year old boys I have met, all of whom grew up into great men.

OP's son sounds nothing like my 17 year old son, who has always been reasonably socially astute. His friends are not like this either. Done some boneheaded things along the way, sure, but they try hard not to do anything that could invite mockery. I'm not clear on why people are getting down on the OP. I think it's a great idea to work with him on these issues before he goes off to college. I'm guessing a lot of you don't have high schoolers?

I also think everyone talking about their clueless DHs would feel some gratitude to a parent who realized their child had a self awareness problem and tried to help him wok on it.

The irony.

Clearly your son doesn't get his maturity and self-awareness from you.

Again, do you have high schoolers?

I certainly don't take credit for my son's personality or the things he's good at, but I have stepped in to help when he or his siblings have started down what seems to be a bad path. I'd hope most parents would have enough empathy for their kids, and enough recall of how fraught the teen years can be to want to do the same. I assume OP is not actually telling her son that he's arrogant, delusional, and average but instead is just seeking anonymous advice on how to help him to stop acting in a way that can come back to haunt him. What's wrong with that?

Because I don't think like you, I can't have high schoolers? Again with the irony.

I do have high schoolers as well as older children, I assure you OP's kid is not an anomaly, and those kids turn out fine, kids with parents like you and tend to have issues down the road.

You can tell what kind of parent I am from two posts on the internet? And you are telling me my children will have issues? And you are acting as if you are superior to both me and the OP?

[Anonymous]

I have a 16 year old son and he doesn't act like this, nor do any of his friends. They go out of their way to not post things that are braggy or would invite criticism. They are typical teenage boys, but they are socially aware. They do have a friend who is very socially awkward and sounds just like OP's son. They barely tolerate him only because they've known him for so long but it is very offputting. They have tried to (nicely and not so nicely) tell him what he does that turns people off but he doesn't seem to get it. He embarrasses them at parties and at school and they're all tired of it. Everyone thought he'd grow out of it but the cringey behavior hasn't gotten any better. I applaud OP's willingness to address her son's issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your son doesn't have autism.
Your son isn't bipolar or any other disorder.
Your son is like the vast majority of 17/18 year old boys I have met, all of whom grew up into great men.

OP's son sounds nothing like my 17 year old son, who has always been reasonably socially astute. His friends are not like this either. Done some boneheaded things along the way, sure, but they try hard not to do anything that could invite mockery. I'm not clear on why people are getting down on the OP. I think it's a great idea to work with him on these issues before he goes off to college. I'm guessing a lot of you don't have high schoolers?

I also think everyone talking about their clueless DHs would feel some gratitude to a parent who realized their child had a self awareness problem and tried to help him wok on it.

I think OP is very smart to be concerned about these things and wanting to help her son. So many parents are blind to their children's flaws and that can be detrimental as well. Good luck op, I have no advice for you as my child is 13 months.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like an insecure and desperate kid who's thirsty for attention.

Like a lot of kids his age. Having a parent like OP hellbent on pointing out his every "flaw" doesn't help matters.

Fishing for attention is a feminine trait. Not a good look for a young man that's a high school upperclassmen.