Does anyone have an average child?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kid is average. Academically, socially, and in sports (actually he is probably below average in sports). Even his ambitions are average - he wants to be a teacher when he grows up vs his friends who all want superstar careers like to be president or a professional football player . I adore him but it is hard when it feels like everyone else talks about their gifted kids. Thanks for reminding me to appreciate him more and not to compare him to others.

Your son will become more successful than the rest who will be neurotic wrecks after their dreams are dashed on the rocky shoals of reality.

He'll become an awesome teacher who will shape and influence the lives of thousands.

When he is an old man, he'll run into one of his students who will break down in tears and hug him like this:

Especially as more children are growing up without a father figure in their homes due to single moms and broken homes, your son will be a huge source of guidance as a teacher.

[Anonymous]

Great clip, thank you so much for posting. What a pleasure to watch. Wonderful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It seems like everyone here and even in real life has a gifted child or a special needs child. Doesn't anyone just have a normal, average child? My husband and I are both PHD's and went to good schools, but our first grader is completely average and doesn't like school. He barely got the required reading score for his grade level. He scored slightly below average on the NNAT. We are pretty much just not worrying about it, since he isn't actually below grade level, and his biggest problem seems to be that he doesn't like school. We don't want to pressure him and make it worse (he had an awful K experience). But I feel kind of worried when everyone talks about how bored their kid is with the regular curriculum and how they are reading these huge books over the summer, and I know that my child is struggling just to do grade level work. Is there anyone else out there who is middle class and educated with a child who isn't a very good student? (How long will it take for this to turn into a thread for people to brag about their gifted children?)

Many kids don't hit their stride with reading until 3rd grade. If the teachers are seeing progress, then I wouldn't worry. If he isn't making consistent progress with reading this year, then I might be concerned.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It seems like everyone here and even in real life has a gifted child or a special needs child. Doesn't anyone just have a normal, average child? My husband and I are both PHD's and went to good schools, but our first grader is completely average and doesn't like school. He barely got the required reading score for his grade level. He scored slightly below average on the NNAT. We are pretty much just not worrying about it, since he isn't actually below grade level, and his biggest problem seems to be that he doesn't like school. We don't want to pressure him and make it worse (he had an awful K experience). But I feel kind of worried when everyone talks about how bored their kid is with the regular curriculum and how they are reading these huge books over the summer, and I know that my child is struggling just to do grade level work. Is there anyone else out there who is middle class and educated with a child who isn't a very good student? (How long will it take for this to turn into a thread for people to brag about their gifted children?)

Many kids don't hit their stride with reading until 3rd grade. If the teachers are seeing progress, then I wouldn't worry. If he isn't making consistent progress with reading this year, then I might be concerned.

Thanks, you're right. I've seen kids go from zero to way above grade level in a short time, sometimes not until 5th or 6th grade. It's so disappointing that FCPS wants to label kids gifted or nt gifted by the end of second grade.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My average child is going to do better in life than the gifted one. Better attitude, people like her, hard worker and her people skills are all around significantly better. She is also a born leader.

Our kids are older but by the time kids are in middle school a lot more parents are willing to concede that their kids are average, nice, decent kids but probably not the next Albert Einstein.

This is true.

My brother is gifted (mensa, genius, crazy smart) and my parents still have to help support him. I am perfectly average in every way - and very successful.

Don't discount average!

[Anonymous]

OP- I wrote earlier- my DS10 was really a superstar in first grade- and he is very smart. However, some of the kids who weren't reading well at that time have since caught up and surpassed him.

Reading becomes a lot more about comprehension by 3rd grade. Some of the kids who worked more slowly but at a steady pace developed excellent comprehension skills- my DS reads too fast and misses a lot.

[Anonymous]

I think they are average, above average and below average in their own ways. They are well rounded, interesting, funny, nice to be around.

They are good students generally but they would rather play video games then read AP literature. They would rather go Go Karting or play baseball than sit around doing school work. They're kids.

We have always expected them to do their homework and make a good effort in school. We're parents .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid is average. Academically, socially, and in sports (actually he is probably below average in sports). Even his ambitions are average - he wants to be a teacher when he grows up vs his friends who all want superstar careers like to be president or a professional football player . I adore him but it is hard when it feels like everyone else talks about their gifted kids. Thanks for reminding me to appreciate him more and not to compare him to others.

Please reconsider. His friends will never be professional football players or presidents, but he may become a teacher someday and deserves not to have a parent who thinks this is a disappointment.

I'm that PP - you missed my point entirely but thanks for making me feel bad. Signed, an average lawyer who thinks teachers are awesome

I am sorry I missed your point. I was thrown by the statement "even his ambitions are average -- he wants to be a teacher." I work with kids and have spent a lot of time disabusing myself and others of the notion that there is a fundamental ranking of careers based on IQ or income or whatever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My older child is pretty average academically. I agree with what you are saying, that basically everyone says their child is either gifted or special needs. Unfortunately in the affluent, over-parenting community I am familiar with, any child who is not performing as "gifted" is then subjected to a series of tutors, psychological assessments, and medications until they do perform as gifted. "Average" has become a problem requiring a medical diagnosis.

I'd rather see busy parents keep trying and throwing the kitchen sink at their average kid to at least bring them above par than to give up and let them be losers. I have a duel MD family next door and it's obvious they've given up on their 9th grade son but they dote on the 11th grade daughter who is clearly going to become a doctor. Even the girl admits "my parents gave up on my brother."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My average child is going to do better in life than the gifted one. Better attitude, people like her, hard worker and her people skills are all around significantly better. She is also a born leader.

Oh great, a self-assured idiot — not enough of those running around.

To be a leader in the 21st century you need IQ. It's a global hyper-competitive economy — people without credentials don't get callbacks or taken seriously. There are plenty of "born leaders" with A's and high-status bonafides.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Great clip, thank you so much for posting. What a pleasure to watch. Wonderful.

See how Ian Wright (the black man) instinctively took his hat off the moment he saw his old school teacher. That kind of respect and admiration is priceless. No amount of biglaw partner-track money can buy that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Rising 1st grader who can't even read. Teacher scored him completely average last year. He may just be average academically (despite phd parents). He may have to work harder in school than I ever did. But he loves loves loves school and is excited to learn things; he is the most curious kid I know. Who cares if he scores mid-range on his ACT and SAT in 12 years and goes to a second-tier state school and has to major in civil engineering instead of a field that requires a lot of critical thinking and writing. If he is excited about learning things and works hard (ok. he doesn't do this so much now - one of the reasons he can't read is because it doesn't come easy to him and he doesn't work hard at it - hopefully this will change as the work get more interesting) and loves life.

I think a kid like yours is pretty likely to succeed because he's had to work for it along the way. My DD is in 2nd and seems to breeze through so far and I'm hoping that things become more difficult. My concern is that a kid like her will have more problems later in life when school gets tough. That was the case for me once I got to an honors HS and my grades quite a bit once I had to work for them.

[Anonymous]

My grades suffered quite a bit*

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My average child is going to do better in life than the gifted one. Better attitude, people like her, hard worker and her people skills are all around significantly better. She is also a born leader.

Our kids are older but by the time kids are in middle school a lot more parents are willing to concede that their kids are average, nice, decent kids but probably not the next Albert Einstein.

This is true.

My brother is gifted (mensa, genius, crazy smart) and my parents still have to help support him. I am perfectly average in every way - and very successful.

Don't discount average!

+1 I have a brother like that too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My average child is going to do better in life than the gifted one. Better attitude, people like her, hard worker and her people skills are all around significantly better. She is also a born leader.

Oh great, a self-assured idiot — not enough of those running around.

To be a leader in the 21st century you need IQ. It's a global hyper-competitive economy — people without credentials don't get callbacks or taken seriously. There are plenty of "born leaders" with A's and high-status bonafides.

My child is not an idiot. You however are still an ass no matter how smart you are.