Does anyone have an average child?

[Anonymous]

Depends what you mean by average, OP.

Either you think average does not exist, and all kids are special in their own way, or you think average encompasses about 90% of kids, which would then include IQs between 70 and 130, which is a very wide range.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 1st grader seems to be average academically. She's a young first grader and isn't reading chapter books. She does the level books and I still read her picture books. We don't do much with math. But she likes school and gets along with her classmates. She's enthusiastic and always shouts a cheery "bye!" to teachers and schoolmates at the end of the day. She's athletic and funny.

Reading chapter books at the very beginning of first grade is considered merely above average these days, not advanced?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Depends what you mean by average, OP.

Either you think average does not exist, and all kids are special in their own way, or you think average encompasses about 90% of kids, which would then include IQs between 70 and 130, which is a very wide range.

Not to hijack a thread, but on what planet is an IQ of 70 average???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My average child is going to do better in life than the gifted one. Better attitude, people like her, hard worker and her people skills are all around significantly better. She is also a born leader.

Our kids are older but by the time kids are in middle school a lot more parents are willing to concede that their kids are average, nice, decent kids but probably not the next Albert Einstein.

What are you trying to accomplish here? You know that all average children do not do better than gifted ones. You know that all average children are not likeable, hard working, with strong people skills. You know that not all gifted children are lazy with poor people skills. Why all the comparing? Just be happy feeling confident that you think your kid will be successful, without also putting down other (unknown) kids (who also may be successful). This is just another way to brag and it's silly.

Signed, mom of average kid.

If you did not notice, she said "MY" kids, not "ALL" kids.

One can assume that this mom knows her own two kids fairly well, including their strengths and weaknesses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My middle schooler isn't an academically focused child. He prefers doing active things. Unless he changes drastically, it won't surprise me if he goes into a trade. That will be shocking for our families since we come from a long line of academic successes, but he would be bored to tears in a desk job and he loves repairing small engines.

Most of us don't want to hear how we have failed as parents or aren't encouraging our children enough. And other people aren't likely to share our joy that our 11 year old just repaired our dryer. There are plenty of average kids. Or kids with talents other than academic.

I do.
And btw, sometimes the kids who can do this stuff are building an understanding that allows them to grasp more abstract concepts later. Concepts that some people will never really understand bc they don't understand the basics mechanics. Not guaranteed , but just another possibility.

[Anonymous]

Hi, OP. Try not to stress about your first grader not reading yet. There is a huge range of development, and some kids just don't pick up reading until well after second grade has started. It didn't click with my son until the second half of second grade -- but when it did, he started reading volumes. He's a voracious reader now, and selected honors English and history in middle school because he wanted a larger reading workload. While he also ended up doing well in math and science, he chose NOT to do honors in those because they are not where his interests lie. Go with the flow. Encourage, bit don't push.

[Anonymous]

Hi, OP. Try not to stress about your first grader not reading yet. There is a huge range of development, and some kids just don't pick up reading until well after second grade has started.

Every word of this is true. This was the norm back in the day. Remember, learning is not a race--it is a matter of building blocks. former First grade teacher

[Anonymous]

My older child was average academically. She had athletic talents and great people skills. She graduate college recently. I am proud of her C average.

[Anonymous]

I thought my kid was behind in K, and he went to summer school, where he just took off! Small class sizes, challenge, and being one of the more advanced kids (it didn't matter to him that he was the best among the worst so to speak) - all this did wonders. He started reading and writing in full sentences and such.
He is now in 1st grade and is challenged much less and I can see him slacking and complaining of being tired. Sometimes tired means bored to death.
Your average kids may just need a better fit than a public school with huge classes and so much time spent on lining up and easy tasks like tracing and adding below 10.

[Anonymous]

Here's a secret. No one ever tells people anything about their kid that isn't good. by middle school you hear even less.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

My older child is pretty average academically. I agree with what you are saying, that basically everyone says their child is either gifted or special needs. Unfortunately in the affluent, overparenting community I am familiar with, any child who is not performing as "gifted" is then subjected to a series of tutors, psychological assessments, and medications until they do perform as gifted. "Average" has become a problem requiring a medical diagnosis.

Great post!

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

My older child is pretty average academically. I agree with what you are saying, that basically everyone says their child is either gifted or special needs. Unfortunately in the affluent, overparenting community I am familiar with, any child who is not performing as "gifted" is then subjected to a series of tutors, psychological assessments, and medications until they do perform as gifted. "Average" has become a problem requiring a medical diagnosis.

Great post!

+1

+100 This is true, but oh so sad. Imagine the message we're sending our kids.

[Anonymous]

My kid is average. Academically, socially, and in sports (actually he is probably below average in sports). Even his ambitions are average - he wants to be a teacher when he grows up vs his friends who all want superstar careers like to be president or a professional football player . I adore him but it is hard when it feels like everyone else talks about their gifted kids. Thanks for reminding me to appreciate him more and not to compare him to others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kid is average. Academically, socially, and in sports (actually he is probably below average in sports). Even his ambitions are average - he wants to be a teacher when he grows up vs his friends who all want superstar careers like to be president or a professional football player . I adore him but it is hard when it feels like everyone else talks about their gifted kids. Thanks for reminding me to appreciate him more and not to compare him to others.

Please reconsider. His friends will never be professional football players or presidents, but he may become a teacher someday and deserves not to have a parent who thinks this is a disappointment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid is average. Academically, socially, and in sports (actually he is probably below average in sports). Even his ambitions are average - he wants to be a teacher when he grows up vs his friends who all want superstar careers like to be president or a professional football player . I adore him but it is hard when it feels like everyone else talks about their gifted kids. Thanks for reminding me to appreciate him more and not to compare him to others.

Please reconsider. His friends will never be professional football players or presidents, but he may become a teacher someday and deserves not to have a parent who thinks this is a disappointment.

I'm that PP - you missed my point entirely but thanks for making me feel bad. Signed, an average lawyer who thinks teachers are awesome