13 year old boy and sleeping in mom/dad's bed

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son is only 6, but this makes me sad that there's some cut off where him sleeping in a bed with his mother becomes horrible.

So you will be sharing a bed with your eighteen year old high school senior man?

At some point they grow up, and the changes in your relationship are normal, healthy and appropriate.

You don't want to be the mom of a man child who can't maintain a normal adult relationship with his wife or other women because you emotionally can't accept him gowing into someone independent of you. Or perhaps you are one of those moms who does...

OMG reading much into a simple comment?! I hear many moms say that their kids will be their babies no matter how old they get. And I feel like that about my 11 cuddly little boy. I also have 15 yo who is not so cuddly, but he never really was. It all feels normal and natural to cuddle my babies if they want to. I am just hoping that when my youngest finds a partner in life that person will love cuddles just like he does. Human contact doesn't have to be always sexual. Sometimes you just want a hug.

[Anonymous]

Can someone explain to me how not allowing your kids to sleep in your bed means you are depriving them of affection?

[Anonymous]

my 12 yo son still likes to sleep in my bed occasionally and it's nice. the bed is big, and he doesn't really cuddle anymore. it's mostly comforting for him. he tends to sleep with his head at the foot of the bed because he wants to be near the animals (cat or dog) who usually sleep there. families are different. whatever works for your family and feels right.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing wrong with it. 13 year old is a child and it is sweet. Try not to go all Puritan and push your loving child away. Boy, girl, father, mother, it is all fine. Only perverts see something wrong in it, because they imagine their own perversion in everything.

THIS

Every other country laughs at how weird we are with our lack of affection

+1000

And we wonder why we have so many angry young men who commit violence. Hm....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing wrong with it. 13 year old is a child and it is sweet. Try not to go all Puritan and push your loving child away. Boy, girl, father, mother, it is all fine. Only perverts see something wrong in it, because they imagine their own perversion in everything.

THIS

Every other country laughs at how weird we are with our lack of affection

No they don't.

Um yeah, they really do.

[Anonymous]

My 10 year old sleeps in our king size bed when dh works out of town. It's a very comfortable bed. He goes in there and lays on it when both of us are home too, but he doesn't get to sleep there unless his dad is out of town. He asks if he can sleep there when he knows dh is out of town overnight and I allow it. I don't think it's weird at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 10 year old sleeps in our king size bed when dh works out of town. It's a very comfortable bed. He goes in there and lays on it when both of us are home too, but he doesn't get to sleep there unless his dad is out of town. He asks if he can sleep there when he knows dh is out of town overnight and I allow it. I don't think it's weird at all.

ten is fine. at some point, the child's body starts changing and it gets weird. My son and I only stopped when it felt weird and it was after ten. We had some horrible illness issues and were unusually close as a result, and all I can say was that sharing a bed was wonderful and then one day it wasn't. We still snuggle, and occasionally lie on my bed while we talk. We just go to sleep separately now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing wrong with it. 13 year old is a child and it is sweet. Try not to go all Puritan and push your loving child away. Boy, girl, father, mother, it is all fine. Only perverts see something wrong in it, because they imagine their own perversion in everything.

THIS

Every other country laughs at how weird we are with our lack of affection

No they don't.

Um yeah, they really do.

List the countries or more properly the cultures.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can someone explain to me how not allowing your kids to sleep in your bed means you are depriving them of affection?

It's DCUM projection is the law of the land.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nothing wrong with it. 13 year old is a child and it is sweet. Try not to go all Puritan and push your loving child away. Boy, girl, father, mother, it is all fine. Only perverts see something wrong in it, because they imagine their own perversion in everything.

+ 1. People need to stop making innocent things perverted.

[Anonymous]

Nothing wrong with it. My 9 year old wants to sleep with me in my bed when DH travels. It's not because DH is gone and DS gets time with me as much as it's that there's no room in our bed when both DH and I are there. We have a tv in our room and DS likes to lie in bed and watch tv and falls asleep. it's a treat for him since he doesn't watch much tv and its an opportunity for him to stay up a little later and indulge.

We started the habit - when DS was younger, DH traveled quite a bit more and I'd invite the kids to sleep with me in bed and stay up and watch tv because dad's gone. our daughter grew out of it much earlier (she's older and stopped wanted to when she was about 7 or 8) but our DS always did. Now, DH doesn't travel that much and I don't offer, but DS will ask if he could "stay in here" when Dad goes on a business trip.

I love it because I know that soon enough he'll become the mopey teen who will just harrumph answers at me when I ask about his day.

[Anonymous]

So I asked my therapist about this. She was shocked at the responses and feels absolutely nothing wrong with it. Just FWIW. Glad to get the confirmation.

[Anonymous]

I used to sleep in bed with my dad when my mom was away. No big deal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So I asked my therapist about this. She was shocked at the responses and feels absolutely nothing wrong with it. Just FWIW. Glad to get the confirmation.

You therapist would have said the same thing had your opinion been on the opposing side.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nothing wrong with it. 13 year old is a child and it is sweet. Try not to go all Puritan and push your loving child away. Boy, girl, father, mother, it is all fine. Only perverts see something wrong in it, because they imagine their own perversion in everything.

agree