Male salary/ income is a deal breaker to women?
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Anonymous
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Yes.
It is to me. I want to have a family and be the primary childcare provider. I also have a liberal arts degree and work in the non profit world. I would never earn enough to be the primary breadwinner in this area. I need a guy who earns at least over 6 figures by 28 so that we can live here comfortably. |
Anonymous
If I were single, honestly, no, he wouldn't have a chance. I'm in my late 30s, I'd be looking for a partner somewhere in their 30s or 40s, and I'm having a hard time imagining a good reason for someone in their 30s or 40s working a cash register at Burger King and only "wanting" to find something better instead of actively looking for/already having found the "something better." If there was a good reason (again, having a hard time thinking what that would be) and his desire to find something better was credible, I still probably wouldn't get seriously involved (especially sufficiently seriously involved to introduce him to my children) until there were more signs that he actually was going to find something better and stick with it. |
Anonymous
Yes |
Anonymous
LOL @ "six figures by 28." I hope you are willing to date outside of your non-profit/political circle. Good luck to you! |
Anonymous
If I were really chasing money doen, I would have the foresight to pick a degree/ career field where potentially rich men will be. I got my MBA from Columbia business school where I ment my husband. We have both done incredibly well in the world of finance. I'd say everyone in my graduating class (62% men) are wealthy. But my DH is also attracted to ambitious women. |
Anonymous
+1 If a woman is chasing money going to business school is a great investment. At worst, she'll end up making money herself. At best she'll also land a rich husband. |
Anonymous
In theory yes. But it also depends on how intellectual, well-read etc he is. I like having interesting conversations with my spouse, and I find that our having similar education levels in related fields means that we tend to have a lot of non-personal stuff to talk about. Then again, I also went to grad school with people who are dull as bricks to talk to, so I know formal education isn't really what determines this, more just general curiosity and natural intelligence...and for all I know someone working at BK has a PhD and is just having trouble getting work in his field. FWIW, I have noticed that sometimes its the men who overcompensate if they feel insecure about having a lower salary. A BigLaw friend of mine has tended to date men outside of law who typically earn less than her (just happenstance). Until her latest BF who I think is awesome and a keeper, they have all been obviously insecure with the discrepancy and exhibited super macho behavior that would really bother me. Her current BF is less well-educated and earns less than her, but treats her fantastically and clearly respects her. I think he's great and really hope they stick together. |
Anonymous
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It boils down to this:
Women don't want to have to financially support a man. This is a fundamental difference between men and women. Women with careers are usually OK if they make more than you, but not if you need financial support. Women are like banks. They only want to be with you when they know that you don't need them. |
Anonymous
However to get into Columbia, you have to have drive, so I didn't go there to meet a man, it is just what I was surrounded with. And yes, I stand fully on my own without my husband. I would be more than just fine if I ended up single, but he's a great partner and an intellectual equal and there's nobody else I'd rather be with. Lots of women meet their future husband's in school or in business. This does not fare well for the Anthropology major that works at the Ad Council...at least increase your odds by working at The Heritage Foundation. |
Anonymous
Lol good point pp! |
Anonymous
Good summary. |
Anonymous
This sums it up for me as well. My first DH was a high earner. That's not why I married him, but we did enjoy a cushy lifestyle given that we both made good money. Second time around I married a college professor. He is time rich, smart, we have tremendous fun together, is my emotional equal. Salary is not poverty wages by any means but not that high, and it's fairly static. |
Anonymous
[b] Yup. most women I think are tired of laying with men who learned their tricks through watching porn. Those types need to have very deep pockets to keep a woman loyal. But if you have a good enough income and slay between the sheets that makes up for a lot in my book. |
Anonymous
| I'm over 40 and, despite my pricey STEM degree, have never managed to make much money doing environmental stuff. It used to be OK but my wife has come to resent the hell out of it because so many of our social peers don't share our financial stresses. |
Anonymous
| Salary is less of an issue for me than unemployment, especially chronic unemployment. I'm in my 40's and have been consistently employed; I assume that a person in my age range with a similar educational background should be able to support himself. He doesn't have to be able to support me, though - I can do that. If I were in my early 20's, it would not throw me if a guy was still trying to get to a stable place. |