Is your husband inconsiderate with food?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP. Thanks for the advice. He is a good person he just has some anger and anxiety issues that he says the pot helps with. I really can't just throw away 10 years. We've been through so much. I stayed with him through jail time and cheating. I think we are stronger for it but obviously there will always be trust issues. I just know he's capable of doing so much more with his life and if he were able to get a good night's sleep maybe he'd be able to focus better during the day. I guess right now the thing that's getting on my nerves the most is the food issue because it affects my day when I'm trying to get ready for work, etc. He was recently referred to a psychiatrist but would rather just try and get sleeping pills from the regular doctor rather than talk to a shrink. And I don't think he's bulimic because he's loud when he throws up, he just has a really fast metabolism.

Ok now you have revealed your trollish self.

Definitely not a troll, he was just younger and really stupid but I stuck with him and we are doing better now. That was the downside to being in a committed relationship with someone from a young age I suppose, I had to be there for all his f-ck ups instead of his mom or grandma. We all did stupid stuff when we were younger, he was just unlucky and got caught. My point in mentioning it is we have a lot of history and have been through some bad times but always make it out to the other side.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So you both aren't eating dinner together? Or sleeping together? Because he's too busy up eating. Huge issues.

Why isn't he sleeping?

He doesn't eat during the day because he doesn't have a car and works from home and can't go anywhere. When we grocery shop he buys himself mostly junk no matter what I say. Then he skips dinner because he doesn't want to eat at the table with my mom because they don't get along. I don't know why he doesn't sleep at night or how to fix it. He tries unisom etc but they don't help him at all.

There is dysfunction in that house that goes WAY beyond him eating all of your poptarts....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP. Thanks for the advice. He is a good person he just has some anger and anxiety issues that he says the pot helps with. I really can't just throw away 10 years. We've been through so much. I stayed with him through jail time and cheating. I think we are stronger for it but obviously there will always be trust issues. I just know he's capable of doing so much more with his life and if he were able to get a good night's sleep maybe he'd be able to focus better during the day. I guess right now the thing that's getting on my nerves the most is the food issue because it affects my day when I'm trying to get ready for work, etc. He was recently referred to a psychiatrist but would rather just try and get sleeping pills from the regular doctor rather than talk to a shrink. And I don't think he's bulimic because he's loud when he throws up, he just has a really fast metabolism.

Ok now you have revealed your trollish self.

Definitely not a troll, he was just younger and really stupid but I stuck with him and we are doing better now. That was the downside to being in a committed relationship with someone from a young age I suppose, I had to be there for all his f-ck ups instead of his mom or grandma. We all did stupid stuff when we were younger, he was just unlucky and got caught. My point in mentioning it is we have a lot of history and have been through some bad times but always make it out to the other side.

What's the other side? You made it through cheating and his criminal activity, and now find yourself with a grouchy pot-smoking binge-eater. Clearly, you are stuck on the idea that you have to stay with this guy despite his total unwillingness to try to get better, but for the love of all that is holy, do not have kids with him. Maybe it's best that you guys stay together, because you both have serious issues you are unwilling to face and try to fix, but just don't subject an innocent baby to them.

[Anonymous]

Then there is nothing more to be said, OP. If you're going to stay in this situation, all that you can do is accept your DH for who he is and decrease your expectations. Put food in a locked box. If you have kids, expect to be like a single parent. And so forth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP. Thanks for the advice. He is a good person he just has some anger and anxiety issues that he says the pot helps with. I really can't just throw away 10 years. We've been through so much. I stayed with him through jail time and cheating. I think we are stronger for it but obviously there will always be trust issues. I just know he's capable of doing so much more with his life and if he were able to get a good night's sleep maybe he'd be able to focus better during the day. I guess right now the thing that's getting on my nerves the most is the food issue because it affects my day when I'm trying to get ready for work, etc. He was recently referred to a psychiatrist but would rather just try and get sleeping pills from the regular doctor rather than talk to a shrink. And I don't think he's bulimic because he's loud when he throws up, he just has a really fast metabolism.

Oh boy. You can't fix stupid. And you OP, are effing stupid. You need as much help as he does. If I were your mother, I'd kick both of your sorry asses to the curb

[Anonymous]

I recall reading a similar thread in the recent past.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP. Thanks for the advice. He is a good person he just has some anger and anxiety issues that he says the pot helps with. I really can't just throw away 10 years. We've been through so much. I stayed with him through jail time and cheating. I think we are stronger for it but obviously there will always be trust issues. I just know he's capable of doing so much more with his life and if he were able to get a good night's sleep maybe he'd be able to focus better during the day. I guess right now the thing that's getting on my nerves the most is the food issue because it affects my day when I'm trying to get ready for work, etc. He was recently referred to a psychiatrist but would rather just try and get sleeping pills from the regular doctor rather than talk to a shrink. And I don't think he's bulimic because he's loud when he throws up, he just has a really fast metabolism.

Ok now you have revealed your trollish self.

Definitely not a troll, he was just younger and really stupid but I stuck with him and we are doing better now. That was the downside to being in a committed relationship with someone from a young age I suppose, I had to be there for all his f-ck ups instead of his mom or grandma. We all did stupid stuff when we were younger, he was just unlucky and got caught. My point in mentioning it is we have a lot of history and have been through some bad times but always make it out to the other side.

I am sorry you think so little of yourself OP, that you think you can't and don't deserve better. Have you read any books about co-dependency? I recommend doing a little research into your ideas about fixing someone who won't fix themselves, it will just make you sick(er) and more unhappy. You need to start taking care of yourself and doing what is right for you. You have been living in the monkey house too long and don't notice the shit smell around you anymore, you gotta get some fresh air and prospective.

[Anonymous]

Hide it or don't buy it.

[Anonymous]

TroLOL

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
ate all the food in the house
refuses to eat normal meals during the day
he buys himself mostly junk no matter what I say
doesn't sleep at all
grumpy a lot
anger
anxiety
pot
jail time
cheating
trust issue
food issue
referred to a psychiatrist
would rather just try and get sleeping pills from the regular doctor rather than talk to a shrink

Well, if he won't go to a psychiatrist, then you might want to think about it for yourself.

[Anonymous]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP. Thanks for the advice. He is a good person he just has some anger and anxiety issues that he says the pot helps with. I really can't just throw away 10 years. We've been through so much. I stayed with him through jail time and cheating. I think we are stronger for it but obviously there will always be trust issues. I just know he's capable of doing so much more with his life and if he were able to get a good night's sleep maybe he'd be able to focus better during the day. I guess right now the thing that's getting on my nerves the most is the food issue because it affects my day when I'm trying to get ready for work, etc. He was recently referred to a psychiatrist but would rather just try and get sleeping pills from the regular doctor rather than talk to a shrink. And I don't think he's bulimic because he's loud when he throws up, he just has a really fast metabolism.

Ok now you have revealed your trollish self.

Definitely not a troll, he was just younger and really stupid but I stuck with him and we are doing better now. That was the downside to being in a committed relationship with someone from a young age I suppose, I had to be there for all his f-ck ups instead of his mom or grandma. We all did stupid stuff when we were younger, he was just unlucky and got caught. My point in mentioning it is we have a lot of history and have been through some bad times but always make it out to the other side.

The bolded part is an interesting comment and probably says a lot about you. You seem to recognize that he's a loser (my term) but you also seem inclined to deflect any responsibility for that away from him.

If this is a serious post (I'm starting to have my doubts) then you need to forget the husband and take a good long look at yourself and figure out why you'd want to remain is what is obviously a terrible relationship with zero upside. At this point your inevitable unhappiness will be your own fault. Time to grow up.

[Anonymous]

You might do some reading about co-dependency and you might think about joining a group called Co-Dependent No More. (CODA). You seem pretty convinced that it's up to you to stick with him and save him. You can't, OP. You are literally throwing away your life. You are not saving him, OP. You are going down in flames.

http://coda.org/

[Anonymous]

"You have been living in the monkey house too long and don't notice the shit smell anymore"....PP, that is my new favorite quote, thank you.

And it definitely applies here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP. Thanks for the advice. He is a good person he just has some anger and anxiety issues that he says the pot helps with. I really can't just throw away 10 years. We've been through so much. I stayed with him through jail time and cheating. I think we are stronger for it but obviously there will always be trust issues. I just know he's capable of doing so much more with his life and if he were able to get a good night's sleep maybe he'd be able to focus better during the day. I guess right now the thing that's getting on my nerves the most is the food issue because it affects my day when I'm trying to get ready for work, etc. He was recently referred to a psychiatrist but would rather just try and get sleeping pills from the regular doctor rather than talk to a shrink. And I don't think he's bulimic because he's loud when he throws up, he just has a really fast metabolism.

Ok now you have revealed your trollish self.

Definitely not a troll, he was just younger and really stupid but I stuck with him and we are doing better now. That was the downside to being in a committed relationship with someone from a young age I suppose, I had to be there for all his f-ck ups instead of his mom or grandma. We all did stupid stuff when we were younger, he was just unlucky and got caught. My point in mentioning it is we have a lot of history and have been through some bad times but always make it out to the other side.

I did stupid stuff when I was younger, but none of it would have gotten me jail time, had I been caught.