Daughter thinks she's transgender; in desperate need of counselor to help us

Anonymous
are transition treatments covered by insurance? It sounds very expensive.
Anonymous
depends on the insurance.
Anonymous
can I just ask, there is a lot of pressure on our kids today that creates gender confusion. What if your daughter thinks she's transgender but actually is not? Who can help her?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Thank God


Exactly! Sounds like this household needs some Jesus and lots of prayer.


Lol, yup I'm sure prayer will fix it.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:No one can push people further away from Jesus than his purported followers. Your posts show nothing but being judgmental, unloving, and unhelpful. Is that what Jesus has taught you? What's wrong with you people that you feel a need to condemn others in His name? Please go away.


+10000. If anything, people like this will turn one AWAY from Jesus. You guys sound like you need to do your own soul searching.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:can I just ask, there is a lot of pressure on our kids today that creates gender confusion. What if your daughter thinks she's transgender but actually is not? Who can help her?


She'll figure it out either way with support. I don't believe there are any pressures to create gender confusion, but there are opportunities for acceptance and exploration. There remain huge pressures to gender conform. No 13 year old wants to be transgender -- it is a tough today despite the recent public awareness. But when kids reach this conclusion in puberty it is more likely than not to stick, unlike with younger children. Protocols prohibit physical transitions before social ones (living as the opposite of one's birth gender) and some kids (and adults) reject binary gender Norns and treat gender as a spectrum between male and female. There is, unfortunately, no single medical diagnostic tool for this, but with assessments and counseling over time a relatively clear picture can emerge. I commend the Charlie Rose special that aired this week to anyone wishing to learn the hard scientific work going on at places like Stanford, Harvard, Cambridge and Wisconsin to better understand the biological underpinnings of being transgender.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:can I just ask, there is a lot of pressure on our kids today that creates gender confusion. What if your daughter thinks she's transgender but actually is not? Who can help her?


She'll figure it out either way with support. I don't believe there are any pressures to create gender confusion, but there are opportunities for acceptance and exploration. There remain huge pressures to gender conform. No 13 year old wants to be transgender -- it is a tough today despite the recent public awareness. But when kids reach this conclusion in puberty it is more likely than not to stick, unlike with younger children. Protocols prohibit physical transitions before social ones (living as the opposite of one's birth gender) and some kids (and adults) reject binary gender Norns and treat gender as a spectrum between male and female. There is, unfortunately, no single medical diagnostic tool for this, but with assessments and counseling over time a relatively clear picture can emerge. I commend the Charlie Rose special that aired this week to anyone wishing to learn the hard scientific work going on at places like Stanford, Harvard, Cambridge and Wisconsin to better understand the biological underpinnings of being transgender.


+1.

Charlie Rose just did one of his "Brain Series" episodes on gender identity on 6/16/15. See http://www.charlierose.com/watch/60578677

You can also watch on the web or on Hulu.

Takeaways are --
1) biological gender, i.e. sex organs and sex chromosomes are different from gender identity and don't always match up,

2) everyone has male and female identity centers in their brain, one of which is usually emphasized during hormonal spurts during the prenatal or post-natal period (within the first year) and then again during puberty. Because of either atypical or absent hormonal surges, kids may develop gender identities that don't match up with their physical sex type. So, transgender feelings seem to be a result of biology, not necessarily "social" pressures.

3) many kids experiment with gender identity during the course of their pre-pubertal development, but kids who are still interested in a different gender identity by adolescence may very well be transgender. That is particularly true where they exhibit interest in wearing opposite sex underwear and sleepwear.

4)There is a protocol, developed and extensively studied by the Dutch and then copied and put into practice in the US by Boston Children's and being replicated in other major hospitals which delays puberty medically for a couple of years to give the adolescent time to consider feelings and decision options. At the end of that time, kids can decide whether to unblock their own puberty or to move ahead with a different hormonal/pubertal transition.

5) Trans kids have a SIGNFICANT suicide risk, and overall allowing them to develop according to their chose gender identity results in much happier outcomes with normalized suicide rates.

Very interesting program. Quick overview. Experts in research biology, medical treatment and a transgender person who happens also to be a researcher.
Anonymous
Thanks media next new trend is going to really mess up the kids. Are both parents in the picture and what is the moral teachings that you adhere to.
Anonymous
If you see a naked tranny it would scare everyone out of the ideas
Anonymous
Desperate need for Jesus
Anonymous
Jesus take the wheel here.
Anonymous
This damn transgender thing is so fashionable now, thank you media. People who transition don't do any better and many do worse. You need good professional help from doctors- not politically motivated trans community. Good luck.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:This damn transgender thing is so fashionable now, thank you media. People who transition don't do any better and many do worse. You need good professional help from doctors- not politically motivated trans community. Good luck.


Please cite to scientific studies to support your proposition that, "People who transition don't do any better and many do worse."

Anonymous
You sound like a good mom, OP. I don't have any advice on counselors, but sounds like you got a lot of recs.

I also just wanted to let you know that when I was 12-13 or so, I went through a phase where I desperately wanted to be a boy. I cut my hair, wore boy clothes, was proud of my hairy legs, was embarrassed of and tried to hide my chest, rode dirt bikes with the boys, wanted to play baseball with the boys instead of the girls' softball team. I had always been a tom boy, liked boy toys, hated dolls, etc. I had never heard of "transgender" back then, but would not doubt that if I had, that's what I would have thought I was. It passed though, and I'm a regular girl now, married with kids. It's good that you are seeking a counselor to help your daughter. Good luck.
Anonymous
I think struggling to find out who you are might be just part of being someone her age. I am not sure you need to rush her off to counseling so much as to support her and let her know she is loved and accepted no matter who she is. I think something we need to be careful about as a society in our rush to being a post-gender world is that kids are a confused mess without having to try to self-identify before they are even old enough to drive a car. These are mature and complicated topics and 13 just seems so young to be sure of anything.
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