Curious: how often do you have sex and what is your children's bedtimes?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:These threads always fascinate me because the folks here are having way more sex than all my friends.

Only the people who do it often are posting.

Sex once or twice a week. Kids are 13 and 15 and often stay up later than I do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:9, 6 and 2

Both 42, We are together almost every other day. Any less and I start to crawl the walls.

I'm female, your age, and the same. Sadly, this is why H and I are separated. I've spent twelve years, ten of them married, being unsatisfied. It's not just lack of frequency; he's just not a sexual person. I couldn't imagine living the rest of my life chronically wanting more action, and more anticipation, and more eagerness on my partner's part. H has admitted reluctantly that he feels sort of relieved at not having to be as active as I like. He now realizes that he should be been honest, and not keeping up the macho facade, and told me when we were dating that once a week is plenty for him.

[Anonymous]

My kids are preschoolers. They go to bed around 8, asleep by 9, up at 7 am (ish).

We haven't had sex in a year. No way we can blame it on the kids - we have issues (though I'm the only one of us who thinks so.) My husband seems horrifyingly content w/ zero libido.

It might be the end of our marriage as all my efforts to change things are failing and he doesn't think it's a big deal. He thinks we're fine, I'm wondering if I can handle a divorce.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids are preschoolers. They go to bed around 8, asleep by 9, up at 7 am (ish).

We haven't had sex in a year. No way we can blame it on the kids - we have issues (though I'm the only one of us who thinks so.) My husband seems horrifyingly content w/ zero libido.

It might be the end of our marriage as all my efforts to change things are failing and he doesn't think it's a big deal. He thinks we're fine, I'm wondering if I can handle a divorce.

So sorry. I don't see how you can stay in this marriage, unless he lets you step out to get your needs met.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids are preschoolers. They go to bed around 8, asleep by 9, up at 7 am (ish).

We haven't had sex in a year. No way we can blame it on the kids - we have issues (though I'm the only one of us who thinks so.) My husband seems horrifyingly content w/ zero libido.

It might be the end of our marriage as all my efforts to change things are failing and he doesn't think it's a big deal. He thinks we're fine, I'm wondering if I can handle a divorce.

Try to get him in to counseling if you haven't tried it already. If he doesn't realize there is a problem, then maybe a divorce is in the future.

And you can handle a divorce. Look at the millions of others that go through it....they all handle it. Once you begin the process and start the transition, you begin to see it isn't as bad as you feared.

Good luck. Maybe separation will wake your husband up and he'll change.

[Anonymous]

to the ladies with a non-sexual Husband:
try massaging his feet and doing more household chores to win him back.
he might also need more "me" time, and want some affection without any expectation of sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:to the ladies with a non-sexual Husband:
try massaging his feet and doing more household chores to win him back.
he might also need more "me" time, and want some affection without any expectation of sex.

Love it!!! Great post.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:to the ladies with a non-sexual Husband:
try massaging his feet and doing more household chores to win him back.
he might also need more "me" time, and want some affection without any expectation of sex.

We women are such an embarrassment to ourselves.

[Anonymous]

Nighttime sex is usually quick and quiet. Teens sleep in, so morning sex is more drawn out. Our frequency is outside the norm, but works great for us. We're both high drive.

[Anonymous]

I am 32, my husband is 28. We have a 2 year old who is in bed by 730/8pm. We both work full time. Some weeks we have sex 4-5 times and other weeks it is closer to 1-2 times. It honestly really depends on the week and what is going on with after work activities/commitments. Some weeks that are super crazy we have less sex because we are both pretty tired. On weeks that are less busy we have more sex. We also have times when one of us is sick or I am having a period and it limits the sex. I have learned not to put a "number" on what is normal for us. I will say that when we do have sex it is GREAT sex. I would rather have quality sex a couple times a week than a bunch of 10 min rounds.

[Anonymous]

we are 40 and 39 years old, kids 4 and 6, bedtime at 8pm. Sex on average 1x per week, but would be less if up to DW (she has low libido). I am also amazed at how much sex everyone else is having, especially how many women out there still want to have sex with their husbands. I can only guess how much better your marriages are. Jealous!

[Anonymous]

Once or twice per year. DW has low libido and mine is high. 1 kid under 5 with a normal and predictable bed time and wake up time. I feel sad writing this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:to the ladies with a non-sexual Husband:
try massaging his feet and doing more household chores to win him back.
he might also need more "me" time, and want some affection without any expectation of sex.

Haha. This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Once or twice per year. DW has low libido and mine is high. 1 kid under 5 with a normal and predictable bed time and wake up time. I feel sad writing this.

Hang in there. I went through long sexless stretches when my kids were younger. Exhaustion was part of it, I'm sure.

Now the kids are teens and sex is 2-3 times a week. Of course I may just be a proxy for the celeb she spends all day crushing on when I'm at work.

[Anonymous]

2 kids, 9 and 6 but with delays relating to special needs so more like 4. Usually once a week.