Clueless kids on bus

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a parent of two bright kids - one at TJ and one in a private middle school - so much can affect whether a 7-year old gets tagged as gifted, which is what it takes to go without intervention into Fairfax AAP. DC1 had a second grade teacher who cared about her AAP "graduates" because she was running a combined 1st and 2nd grade class (class sizes were such this had to happen) and a lot of parents were watching. So she certainly explained how to complete the AAP tests when given. DC1 was AAP and then accepted to TJ which is a great fit so far (as evidenced by hugh grades and 99th percentile standardized test scores since then).

A few years later, same school, DC2 had a different depressed, noncommunicative 2nd grade teacher (subsequently dismissed) who could not even be sure kids didn't leave the school grounds let alone tell them how to complete the test forms. Filling out standardized test forms isn't second nature to all 2nd graders (hence the test prep). DC2 got 99% on one AAP test and 40% on another. After other testing to see if there was a cognitive issue (there wasn't) to the best we could determine the teacher simply didn't explain how to complete the test. And as a result DC2 was going to be labeled "less smart", "only average" or whatever. Instead, we went top private and DC2 is at the top of the class.

So the test results gathered by FCPS can be grossly flawed. Drawing conclusions from them across the board is a mistake. But the kids do adopt the labels. When DC2 said "it's ok mommy, I will be the athlete in the family and DC1 can be the smart one" --- coming from a 7-year old! -- I decided DC2 had to get away from that environment quickly. And results in a highly competitve private school (as well as many other standardized tests since 2nd grade) demonstrate that the measure at age 7 was just inaccurate and not predictive of anything.

So think before you call someone's 8-year old not smart. Do you really know that? The selection process is definitely biased and flawed based on luck of the draw in teachers.

Your description of the second grade teacher makes your post not believable. Even the last part bolded above shows you purely guess it was the teacher's issue, not your kid's. These teachers read a script on test days and they all do a practice run together.

Are you the same poster who keeps trying to discredit people by saying their posts aren't "believable"? Frankly, it is your posts that are questionable. Clearly, you're the one with the agenda and nothing to back it up. One of the laziest ways of disagreeing with someone is to call them out as fabricators, liars, etc. because you simply don't like what they're saying. It's very simplistic and ineffective. And tiresome.

And the single more tiresome way to disagree with other posters is to suggest they are all just one poster, which is what you appear to be doing here. That's the epitome of lazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So my DS came home today and said that he had the distinct pleasure (not) of sitting behind two AAP 3rd grade girls who were crowing about the fact that they were in the "smart" classes at their center school. Apparently they were arguing with another girl, saying they were smarter than her because she is not in AAP.

Because my son is a 6th grader at this school (Gen Ed), he has heard these kinds of remarks countless times and knows just to roll his eyes at the ridiculous kids who blather on like this. But he's a patrol and he felt bad for the girl they were arguing with, so he stuck up for her and told the other two to pipe down, and that they were wrong.

Parents of AAP kids: please stop telling your kids they are "smarter" than the others. They will parrot this BS back, even if you think they won't, making them even more insufferable than usual.

School counselors: if you happen to be reading this, please sit down with the AAP classes at your school and make sure these kids know that they aren't any better, smarter, or more special than the Gen Ed kids. Please ask the administration to stop treating them as such.

FCPS: please do away with centers and drastically cut back AAP admittance, or else open it up to all. You are doing our communities a disservice by dividing up kids in this way.

I'm posting this on both the AAP and VA School forums because it's an issue that affects all kids in this area. Unfortunately.

While I understand your feeling and agree that the AAP kids should learn to be respectful, you're being ridiculous by claiming those kids aren't smarter than gen ed kids, at least in a statistical sense.
Some may claim that AAP kids are not that smart since given the sheer volume of AAP admission. However, if your kids couldn't even get into this allegedly highly inflated program, there is a big chance that they're not bright at all.

This is why some AAP kids behave the way they do. I know kids in Gen Ed who are just as smart or smarter than some AAP kids. Case in point, DC and two other kids in his class were the highest performers in his second grade class--highest math group and reading group throughout the year. DC got into AAP, they didn't. There is no way those kids are "not bright at all." There are three of DC's AAP friends/classmates who get tutoring to help them keep up. When your kids get to high school and you see Gen Ed kids who are doing as well or better than your kid, you'll get how ridiculous your statement is. Until then, it's unfortunate that you might instill this way of thinking in your kid.

Yes. At the end of the day, other things count for far more than the results of some tests administered to 7-year-olds. Parents of older kids know this, even if some parents of some younger children harbor a fear that not getting into AAP will somehow demoralize and stigmatize their child for life.

Which is another reason why making a big deal out of how 8-year-olds discuss AAP, rushing to call some "bullies," and painting all AAP kids as an "insufferable" bunch, as the OP so churlishly did in her first post, was absurd.

Maybe calling all AAP kids insufferable was over the top, but I get OP's point about it not being ok to tell an 8 year old she's not smart or not smart enough. If my child did that, I would be glad the patrol stepped in. Young girls, especially, internalize being told they are not smart, and that chips away at their self esteem. Hopefully the patrol stopped it in a nice way, but it's definitely a teachable moment for the two other girls involved. They don't understand the potential impact of what they did, and maybe if an adult explains why it's hurtful to the other child, it would prevent them from doing it again. Even if OP's presentation of the issue was "over the top," we really should try to teach our kids to be kind to each other, and when they don't get why what they are doing is hurtful, we need to help them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So my DS came home today and said that he had the distinct pleasure (not) of sitting behind two AAP 3rd grade girls who were crowing about the fact that they were in the "smart" classes at their center school. Apparently they were arguing with another girl, saying they were smarter than her because she is not in AAP.

Because my son is a 6th grader at this school (Gen Ed), he has heard these kinds of remarks countless times and knows just to roll his eyes at the ridiculous kids who blather on like this. But he's a patrol and he felt bad for the girl they were arguing with, so he stuck up for her and told the other two to pipe down, and that they were wrong.

Parents of AAP kids: please stop telling your kids they are "smarter" than the others. They will parrot this BS back, even if you think they won't, making them even more insufferable than usual.

School counselors: if you happen to be reading this, please sit down with the AAP classes at your school and make sure these kids know that they aren't any better, smarter, or more special than the Gen Ed kids. Please ask the administration to stop treating them as such.

FCPS: please do away with centers and drastically cut back AAP admittance, or else open it up to all. You are doing our communities a disservice by dividing up kids in this way.

I'm posting this on both the AAP and VA School forums because it's an issue that affects all kids in this area. Unfortunately.

While I understand your feeling and agree that the AAP kids should learn to be respectful, you're being ridiculous by claiming those kids aren't smarter than gen ed kids, at least in a statistical sense.
Some may claim that AAP kids are not that smart since given the sheer volume of AAP admission. However, if your kids couldn't even get into this allegedly highly inflated program, there is a big chance that they're not bright at all.

This is why some AAP kids behave the way they do. I know kids in Gen Ed who are just as smart or smarter than some AAP kids. Case in point, DC and two other kids in his class were the highest performers in his second grade class--highest math group and reading group throughout the year. DC got into AAP, they didn't. There is no way those kids are "not bright at all." There are three of DC's AAP friends/classmates who get tutoring to help them keep up. When your kids get to high school and you see Gen Ed kids who are doing as well or better than your kid, you'll get how ridiculous your statement is. Until then, it's unfortunate that you might instill this way of thinking in your kid.

Yes. At the end of the day, other things count for far more than the results of some tests administered to 7-year-olds. Parents of older kids know this, even if some parents of some younger children harbor a fear that not getting into AAP will somehow demoralize and stigmatize their child for life.

Which is another reason why making a big deal out of how 8-year-olds discuss AAP, rushing to call some "bullies," and painting all AAP kids as an "insufferable" bunch, as the OP so churlishly did in her first post, was absurd.

Maybe calling all AAP kids insufferable was over the top, but I get OP's point about it not being ok to tell an 8 year old she's not smart or not smart enough. If my child did that, I would be glad the patrol stepped in. Young girls, especially, internalize being told they are not smart, and that chips away at their self esteem. Hopefully the patrol stopped it in a nice way, but it's definitely a teachable moment for the two other girls involved. They don't understand the potential impact of what they did, and maybe if an adult explains why it's hurtful to the other child, it would prevent them from doing it again. Even if OP's presentation of the issue was "over the top," we really should try to teach our kids to be kind to each other, and when they don't get why what they are doing is hurtful, we need to help them.

According to the OP, the girls did not tell the other girl she was not "smart" or "smart enough." They claimed to be smarter than her because they were in AAP, and she was not, and apparently she was ready to stand up for herself and argue to the contrary, at least until the patrol decided it was his job to step in and decide the matter.

It's only because academics matter more to people around here than anything else that some parents will have such paroxysms about such a scenario. Kids compare themselves to each other all the time (so do adults, too, if DCUM is any indication). It's apparently OK for kids to tell each other than some are prettier or more handsome than others, or that some are better athletes than others, but if one kids brags that she's smarter than another, the assumption is that the other child's self-esteem will be shaken to the core.

If it rose to the level of ridicule, or was something that one kid raised with another kid on a daily basis, I'd see it differently. But I think you are smoking something if you really want to make a big deal out of this type of conversation among young kids. And, of course, the elephant in the room is that the message that FCPS conveys by deciding that some kids are AAP-eligible, while others are not, is a much bigger deal than what kids on a bus may say to one another one afternoon. If you really have the power of your convictions, you shouldn't just spout platitudes about "teachable moments." You should be working your tail off to get the county to get rid of AAP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So my DS came home today and said that he had the distinct pleasure (not) of sitting behind two AAP 3rd grade girls who were crowing about the fact that they were in the "smart" classes at their center school. Apparently they were arguing with another girl, saying they were smarter than her because she is not in AAP.

Because my son is a 6th grader at this school (Gen Ed), he has heard these kinds of remarks countless times and knows just to roll his eyes at the ridiculous kids who blather on like this. But he's a patrol and he felt bad for the girl they were arguing with, so he stuck up for her and told the other two to pipe down, and that they were wrong.

Parents of AAP kids: please stop telling your kids they are "smarter" than the others. They will parrot this BS back, even if you think they won't, making them even more insufferable than usual.

School counselors: if you happen to be reading this, please sit down with the AAP classes at your school and make sure these kids know that they aren't any better, smarter, or more special than the Gen Ed kids. Please ask the administration to stop treating them as such.

FCPS: please do away with centers and drastically cut back AAP admittance, or else open it up to all. You are doing our communities a disservice by dividing up kids in this way.

I'm posting this on both the AAP and VA School forums because it's an issue that affects all kids in this area. Unfortunately.

While I understand your feeling and agree that the AAP kids should learn to be respectful, you're being ridiculous by claiming those kids aren't smarter than gen ed kids, at least in a statistical sense.
Some may claim that AAP kids are not that smart since given the sheer volume of AAP admission. However, if your kids couldn't even get into this allegedly highly inflated program, there is a big chance that they're not bright at all.

This is why some AAP kids behave the way they do. I know kids in Gen Ed who are just as smart or smarter than some AAP kids. Case in point, DC and two other kids in his class were the highest performers in his second grade class--highest math group and reading group throughout the year. DC got into AAP, they didn't. There is no way those kids are "not bright at all." There are three of DC's AAP friends/classmates who get tutoring to help them keep up. When your kids get to high school and you see Gen Ed kids who are doing as well or better than your kid, you'll get how ridiculous your statement is. Until then, it's unfortunate that you might instill this way of thinking in your kid.

Yes. At the end of the day, other things count for far more than the results of some tests administered to 7-year-olds. Parents of older kids know this, even if some parents of some younger children harbor a fear that not getting into AAP will somehow demoralize and stigmatize their child for life.

Which is another reason why making a big deal out of how 8-year-olds discuss AAP, rushing to call some "bullies," and painting all AAP kids as an "insufferable" bunch, as the OP so churlishly did in her first post, was absurd.

Maybe calling all AAP kids insufferable was over the top, but I get OP's point about it not being ok to tell an 8 year old she's not smart or not smart enough. If my child did that, I would be glad the patrol stepped in. Young girls, especially, internalize being told they are not smart, and that chips away at their self esteem. Hopefully the patrol stopped it in a nice way, but it's definitely a teachable moment for the two other girls involved. They don't understand the potential impact of what they did, and maybe if an adult explains why it's hurtful to the other child, it would prevent them from doing it again. Even if OP's presentation of the issue was "over the top," we really should try to teach our kids to be kind to each other, and when they don't get why what they are doing is hurtful, we need to help them.

According to the OP, the girls did not tell the other girl she was not "smart" or "smart enough." They claimed to be smarter than her because they were in AAP, and she was not, and apparently she was ready to stand up for herself and argue to the contrary, at least until the patrol decided it was his job to step in and decide the matter.

It's only because academics matter more to people around here than anything else that some parents will have such paroxysms about such a scenario. Kids compare themselves to each other all the time (so do adults, too, if DCUM is any indication). It's apparently OK for kids to tell each other than some are prettier or more handsome than others, or that some are better athletes than others, but if one kids brags that she's smarter than another, the assumption is that the other child's self-esteem will be shaken to the core.

If it rose to the level of ridicule, or was something that one kid raised with another kid on a daily basis, I'd see it differently. But I think you are smoking something if you really want to make a big deal out of this type of conversation among young kids. And, of course, the elephant in the room is that the message that FCPS conveys by deciding that some kids are AAP-eligible, while others are not, is a much bigger deal than what kids on a bus may say to one another one afternoon. If you really have the power of your convictions, you shouldn't just spout platitudes about "teachable moments." You should be working your tail off to get the county to get rid of AAP.

You know what, 9:32, I re-read your post again, and actually like the way you articulated it. It's adults who should be teaching kids to be kind generally, and perhaps giving them concrete examples ("think about how you would feel if...") of ways in which feelings can be unnecessarily hurt. That's never going to stop kids from being kids, but at least you've planted the seed in their minds that words have consequences.

It's the demonization of AAP kids and the suggestion that everyone associated with AAP needs to get special training on how to deal with their GenEd peers that I find so odd about this thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a parent of two bright kids - one at TJ and one in a private middle school - so much can affect whether a 7-year old gets tagged as gifted, which is what it takes to go without intervention into Fairfax AAP. DC1 had a second grade teacher who cared about her AAP "graduates" because she was running a combined 1st and 2nd grade class (class sizes were such this had to happen) and a lot of parents were watching. So she certainly explained how to complete the AAP tests when given. DC1 was AAP and then accepted to TJ which is a great fit so far (as evidenced by hugh grades and 99th percentile standardized test scores since then).

A few years later, same school, DC2 had a different depressed, noncommunicative 2nd grade teacher (subsequently dismissed) who could not even be sure kids didn't leave the school grounds let alone tell them how to complete the test forms. Filling out standardized test forms isn't second nature to all 2nd graders (hence the test prep). DC2 got 99% on one AAP test and 40% on another. After other testing to see if there was a cognitive issue (there wasn't) to the best we could determine the teacher simply didn't explain how to complete the test. And as a result DC2 was going to be labeled "less smart", "only average" or whatever. Instead, we went top private and DC2 is at the top of the class.

So the test results gathered by FCPS can be grossly flawed. Drawing conclusions from them across the board is a mistake. But the kids do adopt the labels. When DC2 said "it's ok mommy, I will be the athlete in the family and DC1 can be the smart one" --- coming from a 7-year old! -- I decided DC2 had to get away from that environment quickly. And results in a highly competitve private school (as well as many other standardized tests since 2nd grade) demonstrate that the measure at age 7 was just inaccurate and not predictive of anything.

So think before you call someone's 8-year old not smart. Do you really know that? The selection process is definitely biased and flawed based on luck of the draw in teachers.

Your description of the second grade teacher makes your post not believable. Even the last part bolded above shows you purely guess it was the teacher's issue, not your kid's. These teachers read a script on test days and they all do a practice run together.

Are you the same poster who keeps trying to discredit people by saying their posts aren't "believable"? Frankly, it is your posts that are questionable. Clearly, you're the one with the agenda and nothing to back it up. One of the laziest ways of disagreeing with someone is to call them out as fabricators, liars, etc. because you simply don't like what they're saying. It's very simplistic and ineffective. And tiresome.

And the single more tiresome way to disagree with other posters is to suggest they are all just one poster, which is what you appear to be doing here. That's the epitome of lazy.

Thanks for so clearly proving my point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So my DS came home today and said that he had the distinct pleasure (not) of sitting behind two AAP 3rd grade girls who were crowing about the fact that they were in the "smart" classes at their center school. Apparently they were arguing with another girl, saying they were smarter than her because she is not in AAP.

Because my son is a 6th grader at this school (Gen Ed), he has heard these kinds of remarks countless times and knows just to roll his eyes at the ridiculous kids who blather on like this. But he's a patrol and he felt bad for the girl they were arguing with, so he stuck up for her and told the other two to pipe down, and that they were wrong.

Parents of AAP kids: please stop telling your kids they are "smarter" than the others. They will parrot this BS back, even if you think they won't, making them even more insufferable than usual.

School counselors: if you happen to be reading this, please sit down with the AAP classes at your school and make sure these kids know that they aren't any better, smarter, or more special than the Gen Ed kids. Please ask the administration to stop treating them as such.

FCPS: please do away with centers and drastically cut back AAP admittance, or else open it up to all. You are doing our communities a disservice by dividing up kids in this way.

I'm posting this on both the AAP and VA School forums because it's an issue that affects all kids in this area. Unfortunately.

While I understand your feeling and agree that the AAP kids should learn to be respectful, you're being ridiculous by claiming those kids aren't smarter than gen ed kids, at least in a statistical sense.
Some may claim that AAP kids are not that smart since given the sheer volume of AAP admission. However, if your kids couldn't even get into this allegedly highly inflated program, there is a big chance that they're not bright at all.

This is why some AAP kids behave the way they do. I know kids in Gen Ed who are just as smart or smarter than some AAP kids. Case in point, DC and two other kids in his class were the highest performers in his second grade class--highest math group and reading group throughout the year. DC got into AAP, they didn't. There is no way those kids are "not bright at all." There are three of DC's AAP friends/classmates who get tutoring to help them keep up. When your kids get to high school and you see Gen Ed kids who are doing as well or better than your kid, you'll get how ridiculous your statement is. Until then, it's unfortunate that you might instill this way of thinking in your kid.

Yes. At the end of the day, other things count for far more than the results of some tests administered to 7-year-olds. Parents of older kids know this, even if some parents of some younger children harbor a fear that not getting into AAP will somehow demoralize and stigmatize their child for life.

Which is another reason why making a big deal out of how 8-year-olds discuss AAP, rushing to call some "bullies," and painting all AAP kids as an "insufferable" bunch, as the OP so churlishly did in her first post, was absurd.

Maybe calling all AAP kids insufferable was over the top, but I get OP's point about it not being ok to tell an 8 year old she's not smart or not smart enough. If my child did that, I would be glad the patrol stepped in. Young girls, especially, internalize being told they are not smart, and that chips away at their self esteem. Hopefully the patrol stopped it in a nice way, but it's definitely a teachable moment for the two other girls involved. They don't understand the potential impact of what they did, and maybe if an adult explains why it's hurtful to the other child, it would prevent them from doing it again. Even if OP's presentation of the issue was "over the top," we really should try to teach our kids to be kind to each other, and when they don't get why what they are doing is hurtful, we need to help them.

According to the OP, the girls did not tell the other girl she was not "smart" or "smart enough." They claimed to be smarter than her because they were in AAP, and she was not, and apparently she was ready to stand up for herself and argue to the contrary, at least until the patrol decided it was his job to step in and decide the matter.

It's only because academics matter more to people around here than anything else that some parents will have such paroxysms about such a scenario. Kids compare themselves to each other all the time (so do adults, too, if DCUM is any indication). It's apparently OK for kids to tell each other than some are prettier or more handsome than others, or that some are better athletes than others, but if one kids brags that she's smarter than another, the assumption is that the other child's self-esteem will be shaken to the core.

If it rose to the level of ridicule, or was something that one kid raised with another kid on a daily basis, I'd see it differently. But I think you are smoking something if you really want to make a big deal out of this type of conversation among young kids. And, of course, the elephant in the room is that the message that FCPS conveys by deciding that some kids are AAP-eligible, while others are not, is a much bigger deal than what kids on a bus may say to one another one afternoon. If you really have the power of your convictions, you shouldn't just spout platitudes about "teachable moments." You should be working your tail off to get the county to get rid of AAP.

You know what, 9:32, I re-read your post again, and actually like the way you articulated it. It's adults who should be teaching kids to be kind generally, and perhaps giving them concrete examples ("think about how you would feel if...") of ways in which feelings can be unnecessarily hurt. That's never going to stop kids from being kids, but at least you've planted the seed in their minds that words have consequences.

It's the demonization of AAP kids and the suggestion that everyone associated with AAP needs to get special training on how to deal with their GenEd peers that I find so odd about this thread.

"Special training" is not required. Only common courtesy, manners, and respect.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a parent of two bright kids - one at TJ and one in a private middle school - so much can affect whether a 7-year old gets tagged as gifted, which is what it takes to go without intervention into Fairfax AAP. DC1 had a second grade teacher who cared about her AAP "graduates" because she was running a combined 1st and 2nd grade class (class sizes were such this had to happen) and a lot of parents were watching. So she certainly explained how to complete the AAP tests when given. DC1 was AAP and then accepted to TJ which is a great fit so far (as evidenced by hugh grades and 99th percentile standardized test scores since then).

A few years later, same school, DC2 had a different depressed, noncommunicative 2nd grade teacher (subsequently dismissed) who could not even be sure kids didn't leave the school grounds let alone tell them how to complete the test forms. Filling out standardized test forms isn't second nature to all 2nd graders (hence the test prep). DC2 got 99% on one AAP test and 40% on another. After other testing to see if there was a cognitive issue (there wasn't) to the best we could determine the teacher simply didn't explain how to complete the test. And as a result DC2 was going to be labeled "less smart", "only average" or whatever. Instead, we went top private and DC2 is at the top of the class.

So the test results gathered by FCPS can be grossly flawed. Drawing conclusions from them across the board is a mistake. But the kids do adopt the labels. When DC2 said "it's ok mommy, I will be the athlete in the family and DC1 can be the smart one" --- coming from a 7-year old! -- I decided DC2 had to get away from that environment quickly. And results in a highly competitve private school (as well as many other standardized tests since 2nd grade) demonstrate that the measure at age 7 was just inaccurate and not predictive of anything.

So think before you call someone's 8-year old not smart. Do you really know that? The selection process is definitely biased and flawed based on luck of the draw in teachers.

Your description of the second grade teacher makes your post not believable. Even the last part bolded above shows you purely guess it was the teacher's issue, not your kid's. These teachers read a script on test days and they all do a practice run together.

Are you the same poster who keeps trying to discredit people by saying their posts aren't "believable"? Frankly, it is your posts that are questionable. Clearly, you're the one with the agenda and nothing to back it up. One of the laziest ways of disagreeing with someone is to call them out as fabricators, liars, etc. because you simply don't like what they're saying. It's very simplistic and ineffective. And tiresome.

And the single more tiresome way to disagree with other posters is to suggest they are all just one poster, which is what you appear to be doing here. That's the epitome of lazy.

Thanks for so clearly proving my point.

What point is that? There are clearly multiple posters on this thread with different takes on what type of response is appropriate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So my DS came home today and said that he had the distinct pleasure (not) of sitting behind two AAP 3rd grade girls who were crowing about the fact that they were in the "smart" classes at their center school. Apparently they were arguing with another girl, saying they were smarter than her because she is not in AAP.

Because my son is a 6th grader at this school (Gen Ed), he has heard these kinds of remarks countless times and knows just to roll his eyes at the ridiculous kids who blather on like this. But he's a patrol and he felt bad for the girl they were arguing with, so he stuck up for her and told the other two to pipe down, and that they were wrong.

Parents of AAP kids: please stop telling your kids they are "smarter" than the others. They will parrot this BS back, even if you think they won't, making them even more insufferable than usual.

School counselors: if you happen to be reading this, please sit down with the AAP classes at your school and make sure these kids know that they aren't any better, smarter, or more special than the Gen Ed kids. Please ask the administration to stop treating them as such.

FCPS: please do away with centers and drastically cut back AAP admittance, or else open it up to all. You are doing our communities a disservice by dividing up kids in this way.

I'm posting this on both the AAP and VA School forums because it's an issue that affects all kids in this area. Unfortunately.

While I understand your feeling and agree that the AAP kids should learn to be respectful, you're being ridiculous by claiming those kids aren't smarter than gen ed kids, at least in a statistical sense.
Some may claim that AAP kids are not that smart since given the sheer volume of AAP admission. However, if your kids couldn't even get into this allegedly highly inflated program, there is a big chance that they're not bright at all.

This is why some AAP kids behave the way they do. I know kids in Gen Ed who are just as smart or smarter than some AAP kids. Case in point, DC and two other kids in his class were the highest performers in his second grade class--highest math group and reading group throughout the year. DC got into AAP, they didn't. There is no way those kids are "not bright at all." There are three of DC's AAP friends/classmates who get tutoring to help them keep up. When your kids get to high school and you see Gen Ed kids who are doing as well or better than your kid, you'll get how ridiculous your statement is. Until then, it's unfortunate that you might instill this way of thinking in your kid.

Yes. At the end of the day, other things count for far more than the results of some tests administered to 7-year-olds. Parents of older kids know this, even if some parents of some younger children harbor a fear that not getting into AAP will somehow demoralize and stigmatize their child for life.

Which is another reason why making a big deal out of how 8-year-olds discuss AAP, rushing to call some "bullies," and painting all AAP kids as an "insufferable" bunch, as the OP so churlishly did in her first post, was absurd.

Maybe calling all AAP kids insufferable was over the top, but I get OP's point about it not being ok to tell an 8 year old she's not smart or not smart enough. If my child did that, I would be glad the patrol stepped in. Young girls, especially, internalize being told they are not smart, and that chips away at their self esteem. Hopefully the patrol stopped it in a nice way, but it's definitely a teachable moment for the two other girls involved. They don't understand the potential impact of what they did, and maybe if an adult explains why it's hurtful to the other child, it would prevent them from doing it again. Even if OP's presentation of the issue was "over the top," we really should try to teach our kids to be kind to each other, and when they don't get why what they are doing is hurtful, we need to help them.

According to the OP, the girls did not tell the other girl she was not "smart" or "smart enough." They claimed to be smarter than her because they were in AAP, and she was not, and apparently she was ready to stand up for herself and argue to the contrary, at least until the patrol decided it was his job to step in and decide the matter.

It's only because academics matter more to people around here than anything else that some parents will have such paroxysms about such a scenario. Kids compare themselves to each other all the time (so do adults, too, if DCUM is any indication). It's apparently OK for kids to tell each other than some are prettier or more handsome than others, or that some are better athletes than others, but if one kids brags that she's smarter than another, the assumption is that the other child's self-esteem will be shaken to the core.

If it rose to the level of ridicule, or was something that one kid raised with another kid on a daily basis, I'd see it differently. But I think you are smoking something if you really want to make a big deal out of this type of conversation among young kids. And, of course, the elephant in the room is that the message that FCPS conveys by deciding that some kids are AAP-eligible, while others are not, is a much bigger deal than what kids on a bus may say to one another one afternoon. If you really have the power of your convictions, you shouldn't just spout platitudes about "teachable moments." You should be working your tail off to get the county to get rid of AAP.

You know what, 9:32, I re-read your post again, and actually like the way you articulated it. It's adults who should be teaching kids to be kind generally, and perhaps giving them concrete examples ("think about how you would feel if...") of ways in which feelings can be unnecessarily hurt. That's never going to stop kids from being kids, but at least you've planted the seed in their minds that words have consequences.

It's the demonization of AAP kids and the suggestion that everyone associated with AAP needs to get special training on how to deal with their GenEd peers that I find so odd about this thread.

"Special training" is not required. Only common courtesy, manners, and respect.

And the same should be accorded AAP students, starting with the adults.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So my DS came home today and said that he had the distinct pleasure (not) of sitting behind two AAP 3rd grade girls who were crowing about the fact that they were in the "smart" classes at their center school. Apparently they were arguing with another girl, saying they were smarter than her because she is not in AAP.

Because my son is a 6th grader at this school (Gen Ed), he has heard these kinds of remarks countless times and knows just to roll his eyes at the ridiculous kids who blather on like this. But he's a patrol and he felt bad for the girl they were arguing with, so he stuck up for her and told the other two to pipe down, and that they were wrong.

Parents of AAP kids: please stop telling your kids they are "smarter" than the others. They will parrot this BS back, even if you think they won't, making them even more insufferable than usual.

School counselors: if you happen to be reading this, please sit down with the AAP classes at your school and make sure these kids know that they aren't any better, smarter, or more special than the Gen Ed kids. Please ask the administration to stop treating them as such.

FCPS: please do away with centers and drastically cut back AAP admittance, or else open it up to all. You are doing our communities a disservice by dividing up kids in this way.

I'm posting this on both the AAP and VA School forums because it's an issue that affects all kids in this area. Unfortunately.

The way this is written it is so clear that the poster has an axe to grind and is looking for issues with AAP kids. Haven't all of our kids said something disrespectful, sassy, mean, etc. at any one time or another? Haven't we all, as adults, done so? None of us were there and don't know precisely what was said, but if it came out as reported, then no, that was not a nice conversation the girls had. It doesn't warrant TWO posts on TWO different boards or the language in your post that shows the obvious distaste you have for AAP kids. I also don't think your son should be telling kids to "pipe down" but instead to be more helpful and say things like, "I'm sure you're all smart." Your email then goes on to tell the school counselors to ask the admin to strop treating the AAP kids as more special AND to do away with centers or open it up to all. Um...huh? You have relayed your own biases on to your son who is now on the look out for things, as are you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So my DS came home today and said that he had the distinct pleasure (not) of sitting behind two AAP 3rd grade girls who were crowing about the fact that they were in the "smart" classes at their center school. Apparently they were arguing with another girl, saying they were smarter than her because she is not in AAP.

Because my son is a 6th grader at this school (Gen Ed), he has heard these kinds of remarks countless times and knows just to roll his eyes at the ridiculous kids who blather on like this. But he's a patrol and he felt bad for the girl they were arguing with, so he stuck up for her and told the other two to pipe down, and that they were wrong.

Parents of AAP kids: please stop telling your kids they are "smarter" than the others. They will parrot this BS back, even if you think they won't, making them even more insufferable than usual.

School counselors: if you happen to be reading this, please sit down with the AAP classes at your school and make sure these kids know that they aren't any better, smarter, or more special than the Gen Ed kids. Please ask the administration to stop treating them as such.

FCPS: please do away with centers and drastically cut back AAP admittance, or else open it up to all. You are doing our communities a disservice by dividing up kids in this way.

I'm posting this on both the AAP and VA School forums because it's an issue that affects all kids in this area. Unfortunately.

The way this is written it is so clear that the poster has an axe to grind and is looking for issues with AAP kids. Haven't all of our kids said something disrespectful, sassy, mean, etc. at any one time or another? Haven't we all, as adults, done so? None of us were there and don't know precisely what was said, but if it came out as reported, then no, that was not a nice conversation the girls had. It doesn't warrant TWO posts on TWO different boards or the language in your post that shows the obvious distaste you have for AAP kids. I also don't think your son should be telling kids to "pipe down" but instead to be more helpful and say things like, "I'm sure you're all smart." Your email then goes on to tell the school counselors to ask the admin to strop treating the AAP kids as more special AND to do away with centers or open it up to all. Um...huh? You have relayed your own biases on to your son who is now on the look out for things, as are you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So my DS came home today and said that he had the distinct pleasure (not) of sitting behind two AAP 3rd grade girls who were crowing about the fact that they were in the "smart" classes at their center school. Apparently they were arguing with another girl, saying they were smarter than her because she is not in AAP.

Because my son is a 6th grader at this school (Gen Ed), he has heard these kinds of remarks countless times and knows just to roll his eyes at the ridiculous kids who blather on like this. But he's a patrol and he felt bad for the girl they were arguing with, so he stuck up for her and told the other two to pipe down, and that they were wrong.

Parents of AAP kids: please stop telling your kids they are "smarter" than the others. They will parrot this BS back, even if you think they won't, making them even more insufferable than usual.

School counselors: if you happen to be reading this, please sit down with the AAP classes at your school and make sure these kids know that they aren't any better, smarter, or more special than the Gen Ed kids. Please ask the administration to stop treating them as such.

FCPS: please do away with centers and drastically cut back AAP admittance, or else open it up to all. You are doing our communities a disservice by dividing up kids in this way.

I'm posting this on both the AAP and VA School forums because it's an issue that affects all kids in this area. Unfortunately.

The way this is written it is so clear that the poster has an axe to grind and is looking for issues with AAP kids. Haven't all of our kids said something disrespectful, sassy, mean, etc. at any one time or another? Haven't we all, as adults, done so? None of us were there and don't know precisely what was said, but if it came out as reported, then no, that was not a nice conversation the girls had. It doesn't warrant TWO posts on TWO different boards or the language in your post that shows the obvious distaste you have for AAP kids. I also don't think your son should be telling kids to "pipe down" but instead to be more helpful and say things like, "I'm sure you're all smart." Your email then goes on to tell the school counselors to ask the admin to strop treating the AAP kids as more special AND to do away with centers or open it up to all. Um...huh? You have relayed your own biases on to your son who is now on the look out for things, as are you.

You nailed it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP sounds horrible and I would find it unsettling if I knew her kid was a patrol at our school. I bet her attitudes have rubbed off on him and that he looks to pick fights with AAP kids. Ugh.

And you sound like you have problems with reading comprehension....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP sounds horrible and I would find it unsettling if I knew her kid was a patrol at our school. I bet her attitudes have rubbed off on him and that he looks to pick fights with AAP kids. Ugh.

And you sound like you have problems with reading comprehension....

You can trade insults until the cows come home but the OP's first post was venomous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP sounds horrible and I would find it unsettling if I knew her kid was a patrol at our school. I bet her attitudes have rubbed off on him and that he looks to pick fights with AAP kids. Ugh.

And you sound like you have problems with reading comprehension....

You can trade insults until the cows come home but the OP's first post was venomous.

the silly little incident was just another opportunity for OP to post an anti-AAP screed. There will be others no doubt.
I mean really, do away with the centers or open AAP up to everyone because some 3d graders are mean to each other on the bus?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So my DS came home today and said that he had the distinct pleasure (not) of sitting behind two AAP 3rd grade girls who were crowing about the fact that they were in the "smart" classes at their center school. Apparently they were arguing with another girl, saying they were smarter than her because she is not in AAP.

Because my son is a 6th grader at this school (Gen Ed), he has heard these kinds of remarks countless times and knows just to roll his eyes at the ridiculous kids who blather on like this. But he's a patrol and he felt bad for the girl they were arguing with, so he stuck up for her and told the other two to pipe down, and that they were wrong.

Parents of AAP kids: please stop telling your kids they are "smarter" than the others. They will parrot this BS back, even if you think they won't, making them even more insufferable than usual.

School counselors: if you happen to be reading this, please sit down with the AAP classes at your school and make sure these kids know that they aren't any better, smarter, or more special than the Gen Ed kids. Please ask the administration to stop treating them as such.

FCPS: please do away with centers and drastically cut back AAP admittance, or else open it up to all. You are doing our communities a disservice by dividing up kids in this way.

I'm posting this on both the AAP and VA School forums because it's an issue that affects all kids in this area. Unfortunately.

While I understand your feeling and agree that the AAP kids should learn to be respectful, you're being ridiculous by claiming those kids aren't smarter than gen ed kids, at least in a statistical sense.
Some may claim that AAP kids are not that smart since given the sheer volume of AAP admission. However, if your kids couldn't even get into this allegedly highly inflated program, there is a big chance that they're not bright at all.

This is why some AAP kids behave the way they do. I know kids in Gen Ed who are just as smart or smarter than some AAP kids. Case in point, DC and two other kids in his class were the highest performers in his second grade class--highest math group and reading group throughout the year. DC got into AAP, they didn't. There is no way those kids are "not bright at all." There are three of DC's AAP friends/classmates who get tutoring to help them keep up. When your kids get to high school and you see Gen Ed kids who are doing as well or better than your kid, you'll get how ridiculous your statement is. Until then, it's unfortunate that you might instill this way of thinking in your kid.

Yes, it is very possible that these kids are not bright at all even if they aced gen ed math class. Being smart is about aptitude of understanding/learning stuffs that are beyond most people (similar age)'s reach. Gen ed classes don't fall into that category.
Again, not all AAP kids are smart. But it's highly unlikely your kids are smart if they can't even get in the AAP program.