Rising 7th grade daughter begging for an IPhone- WWYD?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can get a used iPhone for about $100 on craigslist. My youngest got his first iPhone in second grade. One of his older siblings upgraded and he got the older phone. It was very inexpensive to add him to our family plan - about $25 a month. He had that iPhone for almost three years. He never lost or broke it. We upgraded his phone and he's had the newer one for about two years. Again, never broken or lost.

If you don't want to get your kid an iPhone, great. But don't assume those of us who did spent $700 on a new phone plus hundreds on the plan. He is in 6th grade now. I would say that at least 75% of his friends have smart phones. I don't know any kids without cell phones.

That's interesting. Most of the sixth-graders I know do not have a cell phone.

Really? Because our youngest is in sixth grade and I literally cannot think of one of his friends that does not have a cell. Most have smart phones.

In our part of the counter (NOVA: LB, WS, Robinson pyramids) my sixth grader was one of the first to get a cell phone and his was a basic slide.

One by one other kids followed suit, all but one of them basic flip or slide phones.

The only one who has an iphone inherited his mom's old phone.

About half the kids in the grade did not have phones at the end of the year, with many saying their parents were getting them one for MS.

When we got my kid a phone, the Verizon guy at the Fair Lakes store told us most people who were getting their elementary and MS kids phones were selecting basic phones and NOT smart phones.

Even if your kid is saying "everyone" is getting or doing something, "everyone" usually means 4 or 5 people, not literally everyone.

[Anonymous]

70% of teens have smart phones.

http://www.cnet.com/news/smartphones-commandeer-70-percent-of-teen-market/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In Mclean, the many girls on travel soccer team got them at 5th grade. We tried to resists past 6th grade but by then almost all girls had iphones.

it was a rich kid thing.

That may be the case (poster from the LB, WS, Robinson area)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:70% of teens have smart phones.

http://www.cnet.com/news/smartphones-commandeer-70-percent-of-teen-market/

Teens are not fifth graders

Teens are not second graders.

[Anonymous]

So for those who live in areas where most kids have iphones or smart phones by the 5th grade, if your kids don't have one or a basic phone by that age, does that establish where they are on the social hierarchy?

[Anonymous]

We got our daughter an iPhone 4s in 6th grade. We got the phone itself for free from Apple. I signed up for a minimal plan and I wrote an extensive contract for us all to sign about our expectations for usage. It has only been a plus. Her summer camps have been phone free zones -- camp rules. She also knows that she cannot expect any privacy right now with it. She also has a check-in requirement each evening. I did allow a check-in extension this past week when her camp group was planning its outfits for superhero day, but I was enlisted to read her texts to her and respond so she could focus on making her costume. Frankly the phone has been a real help and she has been very responsible.

For those saying only bad parents who make bad decisions get phones for young kids, the earliest phones for kids families were the families going through bad divorces. You know the kind where one parent eliminates or minimizes contact between kids and non-present parent. In fact, I suggested to one such close friend that she buy a phone for her child when her soon to be ex-husband had no land line and refused to provide her a cell phone number and later changed phones and numbers without providing her the new number.

[Anonymous]

No. She can have a flip phone to make calls and text. There is no reason why she needs to have constant access to the internet. She can use the family computer in the kitchen to go online if she wants to.

[Anonymous]

May I suggest getting a "dumb phone" from tracfone that allows for talk and text, but doesn't really do internet? That's what I have and it's $120 per YEAR. you get the security of contact and she can text without the distraction of internet games and postings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So for those who live in areas where most kids have iphones or smart phones by the 5th grade, if your kids don't have one or a basic phone by that age, does that establish where they are on the social hierarchy?

absolutely but not cause and effect, more like effect. Moms that want their daughters to be cool buy the cool phones for their daughters. It works for at least 5th grade and middle school. Take a hard look at the moms of the girls in elementary schools that have those iphones and report back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't get an iphone for a 7th grader, myself. It's starting a big, unnecessary monthly expense at a relatively young age. A simple, cheap phone, would be different.

I agree. My iphone is a pretty big bill for me and there is no way I would double it for a teen who couldn't help pay the bill every month. I'd consider a cheaper phone perhaps.

Not OP, but why is it so high? Is it stuff like Spotify that up the charges?

No. My bill is around $90 for my iphone. It includes texting and a data plan. It's around what some of my friends pay. There is no way I would get the same thing for a middle schooler who can't pay for it. I started out with a cheap flip phone so when my son gets to be that age, I would get a cheaper phone if he contributed to the monthly bill.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:70% of teens have smart phones.

http://www.cnet.com/news/smartphones-commandeer-70-percent-of-teen-market/

Teens are not fifth graders

Teens are not second graders.

OP's kid is about to turn 13.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So for those who live in areas where most kids have iphones or smart phones by the 5th grade, if your kids don't have one or a basic phone by that age, does that establish where they are on the social hierarchy?

absolutely but not cause and effect, more like effect. Moms that want their daughters to be cool buy the cool phones for their daughters. It works for at least 5th grade and middle school. Take a hard look at the moms of the girls in elementary schools that have those iphones and report back.

Boys, too.

[Anonymous]

Another vote for a cheap flip/slide phone. We use a no-contract t-mobile plan and adding a 3rd phone is only $10/month. We live in a not-rich part of Arlington and it seems that very few kids have them in 5th grade and then some get them for 6th, more in 7th, and most by 8th grade.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So for those who live in areas where most kids have iphones or smart phones by the 5th grade, if your kids don't have one or a basic phone by that age, does that establish where they are on the social hierarchy?

absolutely but not cause and effect, more like effect. Moms that want their daughters to be cool buy the cool phones for their daughters. It works for at least 5th grade and middle school. Take a hard look at the moms of the girls in elementary schools that have those iphones and report back.

Boys, too.

This is sad. So if you are popular and your family can't afford a phone or doesn't get you one, you lose your social standing?

[Anonymous]

If you decide on a cell phone, it should be the flip or slide phone still with rules on usage and you checking what is being sent/received. It is not just a question of money, but also of proportionality. I middle schooler may need a cell phone, but this does not need to be an iphone. Also, he/she may not get use it unwisely, but others in her presence or sending her thing may well do so and involve your daughter.