Wife and I don't see eye-to-eye on money

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: 30 days ago the balance was over $16,000 (no, that's not a typo). I was frustrated. How did we burn through $15,000 in 30 days??? I told my wife what the balance was before I left for work and she didn't bat an eye... While I understand she has never felt pressure or stress for money...it really annoys me when she just don't get it or care.

Do you guys monitor how the money is spent? Did she say what she bought? Do you have a budget?
It does seem wasteful given that 80% of humanity lives on less than $10 a day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Yes, we went through $15,000 in 30 days. Just to explain a few of the items:

1. Mortgage was $3500
2. One car payment of $350 (other car is paid off)
3. Insurance $1000
4. Food was probably $500-600
5. Bills, etc.

You make $12K a month and your car is not paid off??? Are you kidding me? With this kind of income you can pay off your mortgage in no time.
You seriously need some Dave Ramsey boot camp.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, why don't you just look at the online statement? Then you will see where it all went and will be in a better position to discuss this. It was just Xmas - how much did you spend on gifts? What about food?

Instead of claiming, "She doesn't appreciate how hard it is to make a lot of money" why don't you sit down together, as a team, and decide where you do and do not want to spend your (combined) income.

There may be a lot of costs associated with your life that you know nothing about. Find out first before yelling about your wife's upbringing.

Yes, this. Definitely do it together. If you can't figure it out, then she might have a gambling problem.

[Anonymous]

DAVE RAMSEY, Stat. The fact that you earn so much but waste so much of it is ridiculous. Your wife should be ashamed of herself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Yes, we went through $15,000 in 30 days. Just to explain a few of the items:

1. Mortgage was $3500
2. One car payment of $350 (other car is paid off)
3. Insurance $1000
4. Food was probably $500-600
5. Bills, etc.

You make $12K a month and your car is not paid off??? Are you kidding me? With this kind of income you can pay off your mortgage in no time.
You seriously need some Dave Ramsey boot camp.

You have no idea what their situation is. We make well over 12K/month and our cars are not paid off. They're at 1.49% interest rates and we have PLENTY of student loans we're paying off first that have higher rates. Try keeping your obnoxious, uninformed and useless comments to yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Yes, we went through $15,000 in 30 days. Just to explain a few of the items:

1. Mortgage was $3500
2. One car payment of $350 (other car is paid off)
3. Insurance $1000
4. Food was probably $500-600
5. Bills, etc.

You make $12K a month and your car is not paid off??? Are you kidding me? With this kind of income you can pay off your mortgage in no time.
You seriously need some Dave Ramsey boot camp.

You have no idea what their situation is. We make well over 12K/month and our cars are not paid off. They're at 1.49% interest rates and we have PLENTY of student loans we're paying off first that have higher rates. Try keeping your obnoxious, uninformed and useless comments to yourself.

WOW. Not pp, but clearly you need Dave Ramsey boot camp, too. If you have THAT much in student loans you have no business going into debt for a car, much less two!!! Stop being so defensive and start getting out of debt!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Yes, we went through $15,000 in 30 days. Just to explain a few of the items:

1. Mortgage was $3500
2. One car payment of $350 (other car is paid off)
3. Insurance $1000
4. Food was probably $500-600
5. Bills, etc.

You make $12K a month and your car is not paid off??? Are you kidding me? With this kind of income you can pay off your mortgage in no time.
You seriously need some Dave Ramsey boot camp.

You have no idea what their situation is. We make well over 12K/month and our cars are not paid off. They're at 1.49% interest rates and we have PLENTY of student loans we're paying off first that have higher rates. Try keeping your obnoxious, uninformed and useless comments to yourself.

WOW. Not pp, but clearly you need Dave Ramsey boot camp, too. If you have THAT much in student loans you have no business going into debt for a car, much less two!!! Stop being so defensive and start getting out of debt!

Dave Ramsey is a huckster.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Yes, we went through $15,000 in 30 days. Just to explain a few of the items:

1. Mortgage was $3500
2. One car payment of $350 (other car is paid off)
3. Insurance $1000
4. Food was probably $500-600
5. Bills, etc.

You make $12K a month and your car is not paid off??? Are you kidding me? With this kind of income you can pay off your mortgage in no time.
You seriously need some Dave Ramsey boot camp.

Not OP, but we have $500k+ HHI and have about $40k in car loans. We also have plenty of cash to pay them off in full. However, one is at 0%, and the other is at 0.9%. Financing from the automaker.
It's cheaper to take that cash, put it in the bank and earn 1% interest than to pay off those loans right away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My wife and I are very different when it comes to money. My parents worked very hard and were very tough on me and my siblings. My wife's parents worked hard also but they weren't hard on her or her siblings. They were, to much a degree, spoiled.

Today, I work and my wife stays home with our baby. I'm okay with this. In fact I pushed her to stay at home instead of work because I make way more than enough money for the entire family. But, often times I feel she takes for granted the money we have. She doesn't appreciate how hard it is to make a lot of money.

This morning I woke up to an alert email from our joint bank account saying we had $1,500 left. 30 days ago the balance was over $16,000 (no, that's not a typo). I was frustrated. How did we burn through $15,000 in 30 days??? I told my wife what the balance was before I left for work and she didn't bat an eye... While I understand she has never felt pressure or stress for money...it really annoys me when she just don't get it or care.

Sorry for the rant...just very upset over this and how hard it is to make as much as I do.

$15,000 in 30 days in insanely unreasonable. You can almost sort out the gold-diggers in this thread by the replies.

Bullshit. It is nobody's business and perfectly fine, but it is not so in this case because the OP is disturbed by it. OP, you must have had a rough month at work. It is transplanted aggression. I second the PP that she probably shops because she's bored. It is not fair to her to resent her for it. You both need to sit down and get on the same page re: finances, but simmering about it will only make it toxic to the marriage.

And PP, your gold-digger comment is just dumb. I don't think it is unreasonable, depends on the circumstances. And trust me, I'm no gold-digger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Just to clarify our joint account is just our spend account. I have savings elsewhere. But, our joint account was set up for all our spending (bills, food, etc). We have plenty in savings.

Wow, that's a really sad problem to have.

Check out my post about my student loans and me buying food at the food bank because I have so many student loans, I might as well not have ever gone to school.

Not to be stuck up, a bitch, or sound better than thou - but please, put your situation into perspective.

Goddamn, PP, how would you like it if some tenant farmer in some third-world shithole got access to the nets and responded to YOUR post complaining about student loans and crappy food bank wares about how they would love a foodbank and to live in a country where access to capital was so free you can get money to educate yourself if you want to pursue it, how they ate beatles for the past 2 days because they had a really bad crop this year, and also worried about water because the rains have been intermittent, and it is getting harder and harder to draw water at a well 3 miles away?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Yes, we went through $15,000 in 30 days. Just to explain a few of the items:

1. Mortgage was $3500
2. One car payment of $350 (other car is paid off)
3. Insurance $1000
4. Food was probably $500-600
5. Bills, etc.

You make $12K a month and your car is not paid off??? Are you kidding me? With this kind of income you can pay off your mortgage in no time.
You seriously need some Dave Ramsey boot camp.

You have no idea what their situation is. We make well over 12K/month and our cars are not paid off. They're at 1.49% interest rates and we have PLENTY of student loans we're paying off first that have higher rates. Try keeping your obnoxious, uninformed and useless comments to yourself.

WOW. Not pp, but clearly you need Dave Ramsey boot camp, too. If you have THAT much in student loans you have no business going into debt for a car, much less two!!! Stop being so defensive and start getting out of debt!

Not ALL debt is bad. Credit card debt is ALWAYS bad, except to save a life or (possibly) to fund a start-up business.

Every wealthy person I know has debt, some have debt in the magnitude that will make your head spin and possibly explode, but they tightly control it, and they have it out of choice to make more money. But, this advice doesn't apply to 99.5% of people anyway because you do not have any substantial investable assets. I myself have 3 personal mortgages (in my own name, not business). I was very, very pleased that the bank let me have the third one. Wasn't sure about that one. I didn't need to get them, But I probably would not have gotten the underlying asset with my own money. With a mortgage, it was a no brainer. I can predict that there will be a handful of people who will flip their anonymous DCUM lid at that lone fact and tell me to go to some Dave Ramsey bootcamp (who the heck is he, is this like the Rich Dad/Poor Dad seminars that are contstantly being pitched to me in junk mailers), but that's because they adhere to the dictum of "no debt." I approve of getting the word out about no debt, for most people that is excellent advice.

1.45% interest rate is quite good. I might have borrowed too. And I too have student loans, and you can bet I am paying the bare minimum on those. Great locked in interest rates.

OK, PP, I'm ready for you! Start screaming at me about how I'm a fool for having open student loans when I can pay them off and 3 mortgages, I'm must be some kind of stupid, who the heck as 3 mortgages?!? Right?

[Anonymous]

My husband panics if we go below $15,000 in the checking account and $25,000 in the emergency fund every month. He'd drop dead if I spent $15,000 in a month.

I might just do it. Just kidding.

OP, does your wife realize a lot of people only make $15,000 a YEAR ? If she did she wouldn't be so damn entitled to spend your hard earned money.

Cut the bitch off !!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband panics if we go below $15,000 in the checking account and $25,000 in the emergency fund every month. He'd drop dead if I spent $15,000 in a month.

I might just do it. Just kidding.

OP, does your wife realize a lot of people only make $15,000 a YEAR ? If she did she wouldn't be so damn entitled to spend your hard earned money.

Cut the bitch off !!

It is THEIR money. They are married, and whatever one earns and brings to the table, becomes the family's. It is not HIS money. Hence...uh, court mandated spousal support.

Stop shitting on SAHMs and devaluing their contribution. I have worked nonstop since before I got married, but really, sometimes the vitriol hurled at SAHMs, especially SAHMs of high-earning men, is quite incredible. If I spent a lot of money one month, my DH should tell me about it if it bothers him, but not because of some weird what-percentage-did-i-make vs. her calculation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband panics if we go below $15,000 in the checking account and $25,000 in the emergency fund every month. He'd drop dead if I spent $15,000 in a month.

I might just do it. Just kidding.

OP, does your wife realize a lot of people only make $15,000 a YEAR ? If she did she wouldn't be so damn entitled to spend your hard earned money.

Cut the bitch off !!

It is THEIR money. They are married, and whatever one earns and brings to the table, becomes the family's. It is not HIS money. Hence...uh, court mandated spousal support.

Stop shitting on SAHMs and devaluing their contribution. I have worked nonstop since before I got married, but really, sometimes the vitriol hurled at SAHMs, especially SAHMs of high-earning men, is quite incredible. If I spent a lot of money one month, my DH should tell me about it if it bothers him, but not because of some weird what-percentage-did-i-make vs. her calculation.

I have a feeling you shit all over your hubby with that ugly mouth of yours.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband panics if we go below $15,000 in the checking account and $25,000 in the emergency fund every month. He'd drop dead if I spent $15,000 in a month.

I might just do it. Just kidding.

OP, does your wife realize a lot of people only make $15,000 a YEAR ? If she did she wouldn't be so damn entitled to spend your hard earned money.

Cut the bitch off !!

It is THEIR money. They are married, and whatever one earns and brings to the table, becomes the family's. It is not HIS money. Hence...uh, court mandated spousal support.

Stop shitting on SAHMs and devaluing their contribution. I have worked nonstop since before I got married, but really, sometimes the vitriol hurled at SAHMs, especially SAHMs of high-earning men, is quite incredible. If I spent a lot of money one month, my DH should tell me about it if it bothers him, but not because of some weird what-percentage-did-i-make vs. her calculation.

I have a feeling you shit all over your hubby with that ugly mouth of yours.

Bitch PP with the controlling husband and very modest bank accounts, is that you honeypie? Your husband doesn't make much and he's overly stingy with your allowance. Don't be angry at the world over it. I know you wonder if you married wrong, you would be SUCH a worthy wife if you had a DH like OP, but stop going through life saying "bitch this and bitch that." Ugh. so jealous and ugly, you are.