When you're a MIL, what will your DIL think of you?

[Anonymous]

If I am ever a MIL, I will be incredibly happy. Right now, I would settle for one date.

[Anonymous]

What if my DS marries a man? then I'd have an SIL.

This board is so fxxking white sliced it bores me.

[Anonymous]

I will do my best to get her to like me. At least in the most superficial of ways. I'll realize you can't force deeper connection, but also that she can always trust me. Even if I don't think she's perfect, I'll welcome her into the family and do what I can to not just add her to our family, but to really make her feel welcome. Ex: my mother always stocks the married-in-kid's favorite snacks and drinks of choice before they visit. She takes note when she's with them in their own homes of what they like (type of beer, favorite chip or cookie) and then makes sure she has it when they come over. She also asks them questions about their childhood and in genuinely interested in the answer and then remembers.

I'll also do my best to stay self-deprecating about our familial quirks and not get offended because she does things differently. I won't judge her relationship with her own mother.

And if I mess up, I'll apologize. I've never once heard my MIL say she's sorry for throwing a huge temper tantrum in the middle of Christmas day or Easter or Thanksgiving. If I ever have some sort of holiday induced meltdown, I will personally apologize to the poor inlaws who have to witness it.

[Anonymous]

In all honesty, she probably won't like me, and I in advance don't care. I used to be well liked, but have become less liked the older I get. It caught me by surprise that several coworkers don't like me, but I didn't care enough to fix it. My former in laws didn't like me either.

I'm not difficult I am just very direct and don't go out of my way to get to know people. Many would describe me as aloof. The good news is I won't be in future DIL's business, nor will I compete with her for the grandkids, because I'm not the least bit interested in being a grandmother.

[Anonymous]

Who the hell cares? I don’t!

[Anonymous]

Probably that I have too many dogs, don’t cook enough and screwed up her husband. I don’t know.

[Anonymous]

No way to tell. I have one DIL with whom I get along very well, and another who thinks I'm satanic. She's the one who wouldn't let the tweens play out of her sight today in a public park.

[Anonymous]

My son is gay and daughter straight, so I’m never going to have one. Hope I can be good to the men in my kids’ lives!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I will do my best to get her to like me. At least in the most superficial of ways. I'll realize you can't force deeper connection, but also that she can always trust me. Even if I don't think she's perfect, I'll welcome her into the family and do what I can to not just add her to our family, but to really make her feel welcome. Ex: my mother always stocks the married-in-kid's favorite snacks and drinks of choice before they visit. She takes note when she's with them in their own homes of what they like (type of beer, favorite chip or cookie) and then makes sure she has it when they come over. She also asks them questions about their childhood and in genuinely interested in the answer and then remembers.

I'll also do my best to stay self-deprecating about our familial quirks and not get offended because she does things differently. I won't judge her relationship with her own mother.

And if I mess up, I'll apologize. I've never once heard my MIL say she's sorry for throwing a huge temper tantrum in the middle of Christmas day or Easter or Thanksgiving. If I ever have some sort of holiday induced meltdown, I will personally apologize to the poor inlaws who have to witness it.

I love this answer!!! I’ll do the same. Also, I’ll try to give DIL money (just nice checks for Christmas, birthday, anniversary, etc.). I will also try to make it financially easy for my kids to visit-cover costs for them to be in a hotel if they want, buy plane tickets. If they are willing, I’ll offer to pay for a nice family vacation every year (or Two or three or five-whatever we can get!) to the carribbean or something (depending on what DIL/son are interested in).

This has been an annoyance with my own family. They always want to demand we show up to all these different things or go on joint vacations, but they never help facilitate despite having a lot of money and much less responsibility than we have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She'll tell my son she thinks I need to watch it with the booze and she won't believe him when he tells her I barely drank during his entire childhood.

She'll tell him she thinks I am going color blind because she can't imagine why else I wear such flashy outfits. She won't believe I used to tend toward preppy frumpy.

She'll think I need to tone down the make-up and learn how to apply lipstick properly.

She'll also complain I am too noisy in bed with his father/my husband/her FIL.

Are you Mrs. Roper??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Like everyone else at first, she will think I'm a cold bitch who is haughty and has no sense of humor. If she digs a little farther, she will like me.

If this is her initial impression, why would she even want to dig further.

[Anonymous]

I hope we get along honestly. I have one kid, a son, and I'd like to think he'll want to come over and still spend time when he's an adult and getting along with his significant other will be key to that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anyone willing to be honest and lay it on the line? Will she hate you with the white hot fury that you feel for your MIL?

I don’t even hate my ex-MIL!

My second (current) MIL and I aren’t super close, but I have not given her much to bond with me over. I don’t wear makeup or gamble.

I will be a MIL next summer. She seems to like me, but I am a low conflict, low demand person. I hope to stay out of her hair and never cause her complaint.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She'll tell my son she thinks I need to watch it with the booze and she won't believe him when he tells her I barely drank during his entire childhood.

She'll tell him she thinks I am going color blind because she can't imagine why else I wear such flashy outfits. She won't believe I used to tend toward preppy frumpy.

She'll think I need to tone down the make-up and learn how to apply lipstick properly.

She'll also complain I am too noisy in bed with his father/my husband/her FIL.

PP, you made my day. We could definitely be old ladies together.

I love my MIL. She's gracious and classy, yet a tough old Irish bird. I send her a card on DH's birthday to thank her for raising such an awesome son.

I hope my children's spouses will feel the same about me.

Oh, attention seekers for days. These are the women who suck the air out of the room. Yes, your succhhhhh a character. So impressed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have two daughters - dont have to worry about it.

So they're fully grown and you On my way! For a fact that they are straight and that they are married?