When you're a MIL, what will your DIL think of you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I thank God every day for my daughter so I don't have to worry about it. If I had a son, I would realize that women make the family plans and that if my DIL didn't like me my access to my son and grandchildren would be greatly diminished.

This is SO true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What if my DS marries a man? then I'd have an SIL.

This board is so fxxking white sliced it bores me.

The women who get their son and a SIL are so blessed!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if my DS marries a man? then I'd have an SIL.

This board is so fxxking white sliced it bores me.

The women who get their son and a SIL are so blessed!

I should have also added that the questions wasn't about a son marrying a man, it's about the difficulties that arise when the son marries a woman. Whether people like it or not, there is just a more difficult relationship between a MIL and DIL than a MIL and a SIL. It just is frequently easier as there is no female competition baggage.

[Anonymous]

OP, no, because I do not hate my MIL at all.

I don’t know my eventual DIL (assuming my sons get married and marry women), so I don’t know what she will think of me. I don’t worry about it either. It’s not nearly as important as her loving my son.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What if my DS marries a man? then I'd have an SIL.

This board is so fxxking white sliced it bores me.

You were the one who assumed the DIL had to marry a son. My youngest is a lesbian and will marry a woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if my DS marries a man? then I'd have an SIL.

This board is so fxxking white sliced it bores me.

You were the one who assumed the DIL had to marry a son. My youngest is a lesbian and will marry a woman.

good for you. I assumed nothing actually, I was responding to the OP's assumptions. Brighten up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She will think I'm a funny, devil may care, live and let live hippy. DS's life after he gets out from under my care will be his business and his only. I don't poke my nose where it doesn't belong, to the point that people sometimes think I don't care about them, which is not the case. I do but I'm also a staunch believer in individualism, even when you are family. Your life, your decisions.

I resent people butting into my life uninvited and I extent the same courtesy to EVERYBODY I know.

Can I introduce my daughter to your son?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What if my DS marries a man? then I'd have an SIL.

This board is so fxxking white sliced it bores me.

Your inability to think critically bores me. How is this "white sliced". The problems between a MIL and DIL are one of the oldest problems on earth, why do you think there are so many MIL jokes. Indian, Chinese, Italian MIL's are some of the worst making it a universal problem.

This thread isn't about having a SIL because SIL's generally aren't a problem. The issue isn't about a daughter having a wife as there is a saying "A daughter is a daughter for life a son is a son until he finds a wife". Generally a daughter will make an effort to stay connected with her family and I would assume it would be the same regardless of if she is marrying a man or woman.

Blast away saying this is sexist or whatever but there is definitely an issue surrounding the specific relationship between a son, MIL and wife and this is what this thread is about. Yes there may be issues with other inlaw relationships but none are so blatant and so rampant as that between a MIL and DIL.

If you can't add to the discussion move on and find something that doesn't bore you. I do find it funny that everyone plans to be a great MIL and I'm not sure what happens to flip the switch but something happens because there are plenty of MIL horror stories.

If I did the opposite to my MIL which would be to let a future DIL make her own decisions in life and not meddle in her marriage and not judge her for being different to me then we would probably be off to an ok start.

[Anonymous]

No idea. I will always seek to approach her with empathy and remember that she is a person who had an entire life before she married into my family, and to approach her with respect and kindness.

I think my own MIL only ever thinks of me as I relate to her. She is openly jealous of me and often resentful of my happiness. It makes me sad and feels like a missed opportunity, because she never had a daughter and my relationship with my own mom has always been burdened by her mental health concerns. But I can't turn my MIL into another person. I accept her for who she is and do my best to work with that. I hope any future DIL or SIL does the same for me. You have to meet people where they are at.

[Anonymous]

I hope she knows that I love her because my son does
& hopefully she’ll be raised with the same values I’m raising my son to have

And my relationship with her would be so close she’ll want me around my grand babies


All the time

[Anonymous]

I hope she loves me.

[Anonymous]

I figure I’m screwed. I love my son but I’m pretty rigid. I’m super close to my mom. I just don’t foresee having a nice DIL and that’s okay. I’ll give her space. I hope my daughters love me. I sort of feel like you raise your sons to go live with another family. My son will cook and clean and be kind but ultimately I’m sure he’ll go to his in-laws instead of my house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What if my DS marries a man? then I'd have an SIL.

This board is so fxxking white sliced it bores me.

I wish. I’d prefer a gay SIL than a DIL

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if my DS marries a man? then I'd have an SIL.

This board is so fxxking white sliced it bores me.

I wish. I’d prefer a gay SIL than a DIL

My teens have all come out as straight. I would love them and hopefully their spouses either way.

I’m pretty easy going, and absolutely know how to mind my own business.

[Anonymous]

It is a no win situation. I happy I have a daughter and worried my next kid will be a boy for this reason