Need an African American to Explain this Behavior

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, because all AA's display the exact same behaviors.

OP here-- no, but when an individual of your ethnicity commits an outrageous act, do you not feel shame? We are all representatives of our identities to the larger world - ethnicity, nationality, etc. If this were not the case, concepts such as "White Guilt" or Germany's guilt over Nazis would not exist. I'm requesting an AA's explanation because before I add this to the "well, some AAs are just hostile towards me" category in my mind, I'd like to have someone at least defend their case.

No, it doesn't work like that here. Maybe it does in your country, but not here. One AA is not representative of all, and no one can answer why he did it, except for him.

OP here-- I agree that his action does not represent his whole peoples. However, I'm trying my best not to generalize and stereotype the entire African American population based on this one incident and I'm beating myself up for not speaking out (asking why he did it), but then again, after that hostile act towards me, I didn't want any more trouble. Is there just a general hostility between African Americans and Asian Americans around this area? (ex. I know it's a problem between, say, Koreans and African Americans in LA)

No, you're not really trying your best. When I hear the young white men in my area talk about "fags" and "stupid queers" and "ugly dykes," I don't rush to DCUM to find out if all young white men are homophobes.

OP here-- PP, you're talking about a cross-cultural issue there. And unfortunately, a large part of this nation's population is homophobic, much to their detriment. If you were living in a community that was homophobic, would you not wish to know and alter your behavior when you go out accordingly? I'm simply asking for the same thing. If there is some beef between African Americans and Asians in this area because of something reprehensible or untoward that Asians committed toward African Americans in the past, I'd like to know and I would alter my behavior while living here appropriately.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, because all AA's display the exact same behaviors.

OP here-- no, but when an individual of your ethnicity commits an outrageous act, do you not feel shame? We are all representatives of our identities to the larger world - ethnicity, nationality, etc. If this were not the case, concepts such as "White Guilt" or Germany's guilt over Nazis would not exist. I'm requesting an AA's explanation because before I add this to the "well, some AAs are just hostile towards me" category in my mind, I'd like to have someone at least defend their case.

No, it doesn't work like that here. Maybe it does in your country, but not here. One AA is not representative of all, and no one can answer why he did it, except for him.

OP here-- I agree that his action does not represent his whole peoples. However, I'm trying my best not to generalize and stereotype the entire African American population based on this one incident and I'm beating myself up for not speaking out (asking why he did it), but then again, after that hostile act towards me, I didn't want any more trouble. Is there just a general hostility between African Americans and Asian Americans around this area? (ex. I know it's a problem between, say, Koreans and African Americans in LA)

That would have been foolish for you to confront him after he committed a hostile act, especially with your baby present. As a 3rd generation American, I do not feel White Guilt. My father's family is German and they do not feel Nazi Guilt. We Americans like to think of ourselves as individuals in control of our own actions and lives, rather than as members of a cultural group.

OP here-- PP, you shouldn't feel either of those concepts, but do you feel extra elation when an American wins a medal at the Olympics? How about a German athlete? We're quick to rally to positive events and allow ourselves to feel a sense of pride when a member of our identity (nationality, ethnicity) does something awesome and you hold that person up as a role model or representative, but, as an American, I think we're also too quick to disassociate ourselves when a member of our identity (nationality, ethnicity) does something wrong/atrocious etc.

When the VT shooter in 2007 turned out to be East Asian, I felt an extra dosage (on top of the sadness already from the event) of shame for sharing the same ethnicity as the shooter. When the crazy Chinese guy beheaded the poor Canadian in 2008 on the bus, I again felt an extra dosage of shame. PP, you shouldn't feel white guilt nor should you feel Nazi guilt (nor should Japanese feel guilt over atrocities committed in WWII), but for an event that just occurred, with very little temporal distance, there should be at least a tiny blip on your shame radar, no? Like, does sharing similar identity traits as Wade Page make you feel more about that awful situation in Wisconsin?

OP, I am proud of American accomplishments but do I feel shame if one American or a group of them commit commit an atrocity? No, these people do not represent me. One part of my family is native American and the other two parts immigrated generations ago. Do I feel a blip of shame if one or a group of them behave badly? No, they are responsible for themselves, just as every member of my family has been responsible for their own actions. Don't you think, OP, that Asians are probably more likely to feel this burden of shame?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, because all AA's display the exact same behaviors.

OP here-- no, but when an individual of your ethnicity commits an outrageous act, do you not feel shame? We are all representatives of our identities to the larger world - ethnicity, nationality, etc. If this were not the case, concepts such as "White Guilt" or Germany's guilt over Nazis would not exist. I'm requesting an AA's explanation because before I add this to the "well, some AAs are just hostile towards me" category in my mind, I'd like to have someone at least defend their case.

No, it doesn't work like that here. Maybe it does in your country, but not here. One AA is not representative of all, and no one can answer why he did it, except for him.

OP here-- I agree that his action does not represent his whole peoples. However, I'm trying my best not to generalize and stereotype the entire African American population based on this one incident and I'm beating myself up for not speaking out (asking why he did it), but then again, after that hostile act towards me, I didn't want any more trouble. Is there just a general hostility between African Americans and Asian Americans around this area? (ex. I know it's a problem between, say, Koreans and African Americans in LA)

That would have been foolish for you to confront him after he committed a hostile act, especially with your baby present. As a 3rd generation American, I do not feel White Guilt. My father's family is German and they do not feel Nazi Guilt. We Americans like to think of ourselves as individuals in control of our own actions and lives, rather than as members of a cultural group.

OP here-- PP, you shouldn't feel either of those concepts, but do you feel extra elation when an American wins a medal at the Olympics? How about a German athlete? We're quick to rally to positive events and allow ourselves to feel a sense of pride when a member of our identity (nationality, ethnicity) does something awesome and you hold that person up as a role model or representative, but, as an American, I think we're also too quick to disassociate ourselves when a member of our identity (nationality, ethnicity) does something wrong/atrocious etc.

When the VT shooter in 2007 turned out to be East Asian, I felt an extra dosage (on top of the sadness already from the event) of shame for sharing the same ethnicity as the shooter. When the crazy Chinese guy beheaded the poor Canadian in 2008 on the bus, I again felt an extra dosage of shame. PP, you shouldn't feel white guilt nor should you feel Nazi guilt (nor should Japanese feel guilt over atrocities committed in WWII), but for an event that just occurred, with very little temporal distance, there should be at least a tiny blip on your shame radar, no? Like, does sharing similar identity traits as Wade Page make you feel more about that awful situation in Wisconsin?

OP, I am proud of American accomplishments but do I feel shame if one American or a group of them commit commit an atrocity? No, these people do not represent me. One part of my family is native American and the other two parts immigrated generations ago. Do I feel a blip of shame if one or a group of them behave badly? No, they are responsible for themselves, just as every member of my family has been responsible for their own actions. Don't you think, OP, that Asians are probably more likely to feel this burden of shame?

OP here-- PP, yeah, Asians are more likely to feel the burden of shame because of the cultural baggage. But is this completely nonexistent in other cultures? (not sarcasm or rhetoric.. I guess I'm completely clueless in this regard).

[Anonymous]

OP, I've read all of your responses to the PPs, and it sounds to me like you are taking your anger out on DCUM, and probably regret that you said/did nothing when the offender committed that disgusting act.

I sense that you want it known what happened to you as a way to engender shame among the AA community at large, at least on this forum. As you said, you felt shame when members of your race/ethnicity committed certain crimes in the past, and for some reason, you expect other racial/ethnic groups to have that same reaction.

You know damn well that nobody can offer you any answer that will completely satisfy you (this has nothing to do with racial tensions between Asians and AAs in DC, so stop reaching). We can all agree that the act was rude, immature, disgusting, wrong. Crap like this happens to people every day, regardless of race, ethnicity, location, etc. Move on.

[Anonymous]

horrible but, someone can be an ass regardless of their race.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I've read all of your responses to the PPs, and it sounds to me like you are taking your anger out on DCUM, and probably regret that you said/did nothing when the offender committed that disgusting act.

I sense that you want it known what happened to you as a way to engender shame among the AA community at large, at least on this forum. As you said, you felt shame when members of your race/ethnicity committed certain crimes in the past, and for some reason, you expect other racial/ethnic groups to have that same reaction.

You know damn well that nobody can offer you any answer that will completely satisfy you (this has nothing to do with racial tensions between Asians and AAs in DC, so stop reaching). We can all agree that the act was rude, immature, disgusting, wrong. Crap like this happens to people every day, regardless of race, ethnicity, location, etc. Move on.

OP here-- PP, thank you for the response. Yeah, I'm venting through DCUM, no I don't regret doing nothing. Yes, I'm trying to engender shame.

Actually an answer will satisfy me (and I've posted previously about this)-- Does anyone know if some Asians have, in the past, done something dastardly or have generally been rude towards the AA community in the area? If so, I apologize and am ashamed for their actions. At the same time, I would like to know to remove my ignorance.

I don't subscribed to the Thomas Hobbes' Leviathan view of humanity so I don't believe crap like this happens every day.

[Anonymous]

OP, do you actually not know any African Americans in real life? Friends or coworkers?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, do you actually not know any African Americans in real life? Friends or coworkers?

OP here-- PP, I have many African American coworkers and will ask them directly regarding this issue tomorrow. This is a way for me to reach a broader community and, as a previous poster highlighted, a way to vent in the immediate aftermath of the incident.

[Anonymous]

Troll

[Anonymous]

But it does, OP. It does. It's the city. All sorts of people from a bunch of different backgrounds bump into each other eevry day. Sometimes, some of those interactions are unpleasant.

Many years ago now two young men crossed the street to speak to me as I was walking to or from a T stop in Boston. One of them said, "My friend here thinks you are hot." Pause. "But I think he's mistaken."

Why me? Why did a couple of young cocky white guys want to cross the street and speak to me and insult me? I wasn't looking at them. I wasn't doing anything, just going about my business. I always keep my eyes down when I am walking to or from the subway. No eye contact no trouble, you know?

They just felt like ruining somebody's day, and I happened to be the one. Woudl they have done it to any tiny white girl (like me) who came along? Any girl at all? I don't know. Nor can you know. You will never know what motivated them. You can know that teenage boys and early 20s boys can be a**holes. They can even be dangerous - see the stats on how many get locked up. But that has everything to do with hormones and nothing to do with race.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:But it does, OP. It does. It's the city. All sorts of people from a bunch of different backgrounds bump into each other eevry day. Sometimes, some of those interactions are unpleasant.

Many years ago now two young men crossed the street to speak to me as I was walking to or from a T stop in Boston. One of them said, "My friend here thinks you are hot." Pause. "But I think he's mistaken."

Why me? Why did a couple of young cocky white guys want to cross the street and speak to me and insult me? I wasn't looking at them. I wasn't doing anything, just going about my business. I always keep my eyes down when I am walking to or from the subway. No eye contact no trouble, you know?

They just felt like ruining somebody's day, and I happened to be the one. Woudl they have done it to any tiny white girl (like me) who came along? Any girl at all? I don't know. Nor can you know. You will never know what motivated them. You can know that teenage boys and early 20s boys can be a**holes. They can even be dangerous - see the stats on how many get locked up. But that has everything to do with hormones and nothing to do with race.

OP here-- I appreciate the response. In nearly 20 years of growing up on the West Coast, I can recall only once where I've had an unpleasant encounter with individuals outside of my own race (some idiots drove by yelling "Go back to your country"-- standard fare). I'm honestly not trolling-- If there are more racial tensions along the East Coast (and the further south one goes along said coast), I'd like to know.

[Anonymous]

You should ask the other parents in that daycare about racial tensions.

[Anonymous]

Ah, don't worry about it. The kid is going to be in jail in a couple of years anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That is just reprehensible. I don't know why everyone wants to jump on here claiming it's not representative of young black male behavior, but I have seen this sort of behavior from young black males, too -- and have never seen it from any other race in this country. I don't think this act was racism against OP, but I do think it's a deep cultural and social issue that many urban black males grow up behaving this way, but get a pass because it's "racist" to call them out. I'm calling them out: this is not the way a human being in a civilized nation should ever treat the mother of a baby in front of that baby, and PPs are fooling themselves if they think it doesn't cause people like OP and me to associate those behaviors with the whole group. I know this is an unpopular thing to say and think.

You haven't been around enough. This is young punk behavior, propped up by the presence of his like-minded companions.

Sorry, but there IS a real problem with the black youth in this city. I grew up here and there is a lot of hostility. I then lived in a racially diverse neighborhood off of U street for 10 years and witnessed it over and over again: young black males acting very hostile and angry towards me. More than a handful of times I had males say racially charged things to me like "You better get inside your house whitey" etc etc etc. Of course I don't judge the entire black population over what seems to be a serious problem in this city - but still, it shouldn't be ignored. I'm not talking about "typical teenage punk behavior" here.

[Anonymous]

It is only racism if the victim is black. had a black person posted that a white or Asian person had spit on their car as they approached, racism would have been the first word thrown out there. If it happens to any other race it is an example of individuals acting poorly, if it happens to an AA, it is racism.