Guys, if your wife clearly married you for your money, are you okay with it?

[Anonymous]

Based on your description, OP, the husband clearly married his wife for her looks, so I'm sure both parties were happen with the union/exchange.

[Anonymous]

I am an athletic, pretty woman in my mid-thirties. My husband is in his late 50s and, quite go esy. Isn't objectively physically attractive. He's the most engaging, loving husband I could imagine, and is a wonderful father. I care a lot about my friends and am pretty social, but my favorite times are hanging out with my husband (and now our kids). You. Ever k is about another person's marriage or motivations. Really best not to judge in my view.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am an athletic, pretty woman in my mid-thirties. My husband is in his late 50s and, quite go esy. Isn't objectively physically attractive. He's the most engaging, loving husband I could imagine, and is a wonderful father. I care a lot about my friends and am pretty social, but my favorite times are hanging out with my husband (and now our kids). You. Ever k is about another person's marriage or motivations. Really best not to judge in my view.

Gibberish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am an athletic, pretty woman in my mid-thirties. My husband is in his late 50s and, quite go esy. Isn't objectively physically attractive. He's the most engaging, loving husband I could imagine, and is a wonderful father. I care a lot about my friends and am pretty social, but my favorite times are hanging out with my husband (and now our kids). You. Ever k is about another person's marriage or motivations. Really best not to judge in my view.

Gibberish.

LOL!!!^^^^^

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My super hot SIL married her very stuffy, bland, and dull DH for money and wasn't secretive about it. He was quite proud of being a good provider. Ugh.

20 years later, he dumped her for his young assistant soul mate.

SIL, who had been a SAHM for 19 years, was shocked when she had to get a job.

Apparently she didn't marry for enough money if she had to get a job after 19 years. She should have been set after the first 5!

[Anonymous]

Married a man 20 years older, have 2 kids. Not for money.

I am offended by OP's jumping to conclusions and judgmental attitude.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OK, I'll bite.

I think there can be a number of situations. I think most often, the guys are very egotistical and/or have inflated senses of entitlement. So, in a way, they are in denial about the mismatch or just think they are the sh!t and rightfully deserve the best women.

And then there are women that truly don't care about looks. Not saying that money isn't a huge pro on the pro/con list, but to many women looks aren't as important as you would think.

I'm no model, but I'm pretty "hot" and was always cute and popular growing up. I've NEVER been interested in looks. As long as I can remember. Even in high school, my friends would be so confused by my crushes. I'm not saying the woman you saw at the mall didn't marry for money, but even if she did, the gap might not seem as wide to her.

I'm in the same spot as this PP. Pretty "hot" and look half to two-thirds my age (I'm in my early 40s). My DH is 10 years older than me but he looks his age and is average-looking and for as long as we've been together, people have occasionally mistaken him for my father (and more recently, for our kids' grandfather).
Like the PP, I'm not that interested in looks. Sure, they're a nice addition to the package if you can manage them but they rank far down my list after things like humanity, intelligence, honesty, humor, charm, etc. In reference to us, DH sometimes quotes the line from Roger Rabbit where what's-her-name gets asked "how does a girl like you end up with a guy like him?" and she answers "He makes me laugh." Which is basically true about us.

Oh, and DH is a government employee with no inheritance prospects.

You can't judge a book by its cover.

[Anonymous]

Ever heard of Sophia Loren and Carlo Ponti? Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas? Anette Bening and Warren Beatty?

OP, you seem to assume that if two fools who are matched in looks and finances hook up, that's love, and anything that deviates from that isn't.

You're forgetting that when one of the two matching fools ages a lot faster, or becomes really fat, or ends up making less money, the other fool is likely to bolt for a better deal.
So much for your notions of "love."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK, I'll bite.

I think there can be a number of situations. I think most often, the guys are very egotistical and/or have inflated senses of entitlement. So, in a way, they are in denial about the mismatch or just think they are the sh!t and rightfully deserve the best women.

And then there are women that truly don't care about looks. Not saying that money isn't a huge pro on the pro/con list, but to many women looks aren't as important as you would think.

I'm no model, but I'm pretty "hot" and was always cute and popular growing up. I've NEVER been interested in looks. As long as I can remember. Even in high school, my friends would be so confused by my crushes. I'm not saying the woman you saw at the mall didn't marry for money, but even if she did, the gap might not seem as wide to her.

I'm in the same spot as this PP. Pretty "hot" and look half to two-thirds my age (I'm in my early 40s). My DH is 10 years older than me but he looks his age and is average-looking and for as long as we've been together, people have occasionally mistaken him for my father (and more recently, for our kids' grandfather).
Like the PP, I'm not that interested in looks. Sure, they're a nice addition to the package if you can manage them but they rank far down my list after things like humanity, intelligence, honesty, humor, charm, etc. In reference to us, DH sometimes quotes the line from Roger Rabbit where what's-her-name gets asked "how does a girl like you end up with a guy like him?" and she answers "He makes me laugh." Which is basically true about us.

Oh, and DH is a government employee with no inheritance prospects.

You can't judge a book by its cover.

So true.

[Anonymous]

I didn't marry for money, but I should have.

[Anonymous]

When I married my husband he made a ton of money and there was no reason to think that would change. Then he decided he didn't want to make a ton of money anymore, so he stopped making a ton of money. Then we struggled like crazy for several years while I wasn't in a position to be an earner and he ran up debt without regard for how he'd (we'd) pay it back. Now we're just getting back on our feet. Did I anticipate wealth and enjoy the money? Yes. Am I disappointed and do I feel cheated/baffled/frustrated? You bet I do. Do I regret marrying him? Nope.

These things are complicated.

[Anonymous]

My wife is 22 yrs my junior. We genuinely enjoy each other's company, is it love, no not in the traditional sense. She loves being Sadie married lady, and the status of being Mrs. Surgeon (liver & transplant). I love every physical attribute, her figure her eyes and the adoring way she acts towards me. I know I married her out of lust and have no reason to think she did any different, just not ludting after the same thing. We both accommodate each others desires, wants and needs quite happily , hence we're both quite fore filled by our relationship. No kids and the prenup ( 8yrs) had 2 yrs to go

[Anonymous]

Not a guy. When I dated I did consider current stability (job) and future prospects. My parents were well enough off and I wanted that security in a mate. Found it, but the security part wasn't as secure as what I expected. That being said, I also liked his personality and looks as well. I don't think anyone would argue that I didn't pick at least an equal with the disparity being mainly our incomes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

What is a cord?

Sort of like a rope.

[Anonymous]

Anyone who says that money isn't a very important part of a marriage is lying. Look at Ron Perleman, the billionaire who runs Revlon. If he was selling newspapers at Dulles, would women be interested in him?