Why don't DC women take a little time to spruce up?

[Anonymous]

I have a child with autism and spending money on that is much more important than fancy haircuts and clothes.

[Anonymous]

I was on board until the "pearl clutching" Tired phrase. Drop it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"I'm used to looking pretty. I like to be the prettiest or at least top 3 in a room. "

Oh, my God. That will all tank when you go through menopause. Then what?

Yes. That is not a woman that will age well.

Coming from someone that was always told that I was the prettiest in the room. No matter how well you age---when you hit your mid-40s and beyond and you are in mixed age company...you won't even make the top 10 anymore. Happens to all of us. Even Demi is really starting to not look so well next to Ashton anymore and you can sense her panic and yearning for youth. Courtney Cox is starting to at times get the weird botox look---etc, etc, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"I'm used to looking pretty. I like to be the prettiest or at least top 3 in a room. "

Oh, my God. That will all tank when you go through menopause. Then what?

Yes. That is not a woman that will age well.

Coming from someone that was always told that I was the prettiest in the room. No matter how well you age---when you hit your mid-40s and beyond and you are in mixed age company...you won't even make the top 10 anymore. Happens to all of us. Even Demi is really starting to not look so well next to Ashton anymore and you can sense her panic and yearning for youth. Courtney Cox is starting to at times get the weird botox look---etc, etc, etc.

I noticed that too. Desperation is not a good look. After 30's, women get lumped into one group, "older women". No matter how 'hot' you were, the age is the equalizer. Save your money and focus on enhancing other part of the anatomy, the brains.

[Anonymous]

Why does this topic keep coming up?? Seriously?

[Anonymous]

Who are you people? Do you really pride yourself on doing the absolute minimum before you leave the house in the morning? Why don't I know you in real life? Every woman I knows puts some effort into her appearance -- whether they prefer stylish clothes, flattering cuts, perfect make-up, the newest handbag, etc. Everyone I know values SOMETHING. It does not make you a better person to go out in the world looking terrible. Just like it does not make you a worse person if you decide to do so.

With all that said, OP, I think the fact you started this thread is ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Who are you people? Do you really pride yourself on doing the absolute minimum before you leave the house in the morning? Why don't I know you in real life? Every woman I knows puts some effort into her appearance -- whether they prefer stylish clothes, flattering cuts, perfect make-up, the newest handbag, etc. Everyone I know values SOMETHING. It does not make you a better person to go out in the world looking terrible. Just like it does not make you a worse person if you decide to do so.

With all that said, OP, I think the fact you started this thread is ridiculous.

Eh, I'm in tech. No reason for me to doll myself up, when the easiest thing to fake online is looks (and the hardest is brains).

I personally take great care of myself (exercise, eat whole foods, meditate). But where I draw the line is doing things just so others think I'm pretty. My DH fell in love with me in college when I couldn't even be arsed to wear non-pajamas outside of the house, and I get plenty of validation from my skills and abilities.

I can see that it doesn't make you a worse person to doll yourself up, but PP, your theory that all women put effort into their appearance because of their values is not helped by your examples (which are all material things, not values). I think things like exercise and eating right reflect better values than painting your nails or carrying an expensive bag, but that's just my perspective.

[Anonymous]

I am the poster you quoted and I agree with you! In fact, I wish I had included those values in my original post. Exercise and eating right are even better examples of what my sleep deprived brain was trying to say (I have a toothache and a young toddler).

At any rate, I get frustrated when women tell other women that if they value ANYTHING outside intellectual pursuits than they must be stupid, vain, and vapid. All of us do something that helps us feel better...whether it is yoga, running, buying a new pair of shoes, fixing our hair, etc.

The other part that frustrates me is that it is the same group of women who go on and on about dressing professionally at work, that sweaters scream secretary, etc. You can't have your cake and eat it too!

[Anonymous]

I spend a great deal of time in France. The reason that women in DC don't get dolled up is that DC men only appreciate 16 year olds. French men? that's a different story. They love women of all ages, and just the way they look at you (even when you are over 40) is worth 10 lbs of makeup. The sexiness just shines out of you

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do. I feel better when I do. On days that I look sloppy I feel bad. But, not to troll even further...I'm used to looking pretty. I like to be the prettiest or at least top 3 in a room. Maybe if there wasn't much I could do about my looks I'd feel differently.

I felt this way when I was dating a guy not worth dating. Grow up. You sound like a hooker.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I spend a great deal of time in France. The reason that women in DC don't get dolled up is that DC men only appreciate 16 year olds. French men? that's a different story. They love women of all ages, and just the way they look at you (even when you are over 40) is worth 10 lbs of makeup. The sexiness just shines out of you

Et when ze French men get tired of looking at you (and zeyr wives), zey can look at zer mistresses!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am the poster you quoted and I agree with you! In fact, I wish I had included those values in my original post. Exercise and eating right are even better examples of what my sleep deprived brain was trying to say (I have a toothache and a young toddler).

At any rate, I get frustrated when women tell other women that if they value ANYTHING outside intellectual pursuits than they must be stupid, vain, and vapid. All of us do something that helps us feel better...whether it is yoga, running, buying a new pair of shoes, fixing our hair, etc.

The other part that frustrates me is that it is the same group of women who go on and on about dressing professionally at work, that sweaters scream secretary, etc. You can't have your cake and eat it too!

I totally agree. I have multiple degrees from Ivy League colleges, have a high powered job, spend quality time with my DH and kids, follow the news, read widely etc, etc. At the same time I enjoy being a woman and don't try to hide all evidence of my femininity so that others will think I'm smart. I know I'm smart as does anyone who knows me.

Just as women don't NEED to dress up to be attractive, we don'tNEED to dress down to be smart. If you want to dress down (regardless of your intelligence) that's fine and if an intelligent woman wants dress up that's fine too.

[Anonymous]

No point in continuing this conversation. DC women are just frumpy, ugly and dress like Belorussian accounting clerks. On the bright side they are well educated with high income potential. And I'm sure I speak for most DC men when I assert the later is much sexier than the former....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am the poster you quoted and I agree with you! In fact, I wish I had included those values in my original post. Exercise and eating right are even better examples of what my sleep deprived brain was trying to say (I have a toothache and a young toddler).

At any rate, I get frustrated when women tell other women that if they value ANYTHING outside intellectual pursuits than they must be stupid, vain, and vapid. All of us do something that helps us feel better...whether it is yoga, running, buying a new pair of shoes, fixing our hair, etc.

The other part that frustrates me is that it is the same group of women who go on and on about dressing professionally at work, that sweaters scream secretary, etc. You can't have your cake and eat it too!

I totally agree. I have multiple degrees from Ivy League colleges, have a high powered job, spend quality time with my DH and kids, follow the news, read widely etc, etc. At the same time I enjoy being a woman and don't try to hide all evidence of my femininity so that others will think I'm smart. I know I'm smart as does anyone who knows me.

Just as women don't NEED to dress up to be attractive, we don'tNEED to dress down to be smart. If you want to dress down (regardless of your intelligence) that's fine and if an intelligent woman wants dress up that's fine too.

Yes!! Thank you. I dress up and have multiple degrees and work in a very specialized, scientific fields. When I first started my career (and was in my 20's) I was still figuring out how to get people to take me seriously, and so I stopped wearing make up, doing my hair, clothes, etc.. Guess what, all it made me do is feel like crap! I get taken seriously now because of my knowledge...and as far as I've ever read, looking good can actually help you get ahead.

[Anonymous]

I used to care. A lot. I think I was often the prettiest girl in the room. I fretted about every wrinkle and pound.

Then I got married, my work life got busy, I had a kid and...my values shifted. I don't have time for that primping crap anymore - I have more important things to care about.

And I am fully aware that, at almost 40, I'm not the knockout I used to be (we have a smokin' hot intern whose mere presence reminds me of that daily).

Know what? I don't give a crap, because I have a happy life, including a husband who routinely admonishes me to stop wearing makeup and straightening my hair because he likes the natural look, even though I'm old.

OP, I hope you find some peace in who you are.