What do you think of this!?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WTF is wrong with you people that you can think this is even remotely OK?

I know, I cannot believe the number of people making excuses for this woman. And the whole 'it's so hard having 3 kids thing' is bs. If you can't handle it, stop popping out babies until you get the logistics down, because having 2 kids napping in the car while you're in an activity with another one is not ok.

So would you have said something to her face, or just called the cops?

That is an excellent question, and I honestly don't know. I'd like to think I'd talk to her directly, but I'm not sure that I would get anywhere with someone who thinks it's ok to leave 2 kids in a car for 45 minutes, even if you can see the car.

[Anonymous]

i agree with the PP above....the right thing to do would be to hang out in the car with the napping kids.. you would miss watching the older one dance, but that is really the safest thing to do...everything is a trade off and juggling act when you have kids, especially 3 kids....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:how can you lock a runnin car? does she owe a 1990 Honda civic?

how could she owe somebody a honda civic? did she lose a bet?

are you mentally challenged? obviously i meant own. fuck YOU and autocorrect.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm not being snarky, but I don't understand why you would think it's OK to not say anything to her, but it is ok to call the police/CPS. I can imagine that having the police/CPS confront their mother is terrifying for kids. If the point is to help/save the children wouldn't it be safer to confront her directly rather than escalating it to CPS?

Exactly. I like this. OP, maybe if you had talked to her, asked her questions, gotten to know her a little bit, maybe you would have felt comfortable enough to ask her about the car situation. It really doesn't seem like she was being this horribly neglectful mother. I wouldn't have done what she's doing, but it really sounds like her kids were not in any immediate danger... at least not enough danger that the cops or cps should get involved.

Talking to her first, I think, would have been the best option. Instead, you and your friend come off as two meddling, judgmental women, wringing your hands in the corner and whispering about what a horrible mother she is. And then calling the cops on her?

That's definitely not what I would've done.

Completely disagree with this. Call CPS and the police. Do it anonymously if necessary.
I used to hire a babysitter to watch my younger ones when older ones had activities I didn't want to miss.
This mom sounds irresponsible, and possibly not too bright.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:how can you lock a runnin car? does she owe a 1990 Honda civic?

how could she owe somebody a honda civic? did she lose a bet?

are you mentally challenged? obviously i meant own. fuck YOU and autocorrect.

Whoa, sounds like the prisoners are on their computer time right now, watch out.

[Anonymous]

love how this thread brings out the nasties and crazies.

whether you personally think this is okay or not, it doesn't matter because its illegal. So stop fighting.

I guess I would offer to watch her kid inthe class, bring kid back to car when class is over, etc so that she can stay with napping kids.

[Anonymous]

It's all well and good to suggest talking to her directly, but do any of you really think that would do any good? Do you really think approaching this woman and saying to her, however earnestly, "I am concerned about your children," is going to provoke a thoughtful and positive reaction? Come on. She'll either ignore the comments and keep doing what she's doing or get nasty (like most of the people on this board). Highly unlikely she'll say, "Oh. You're right, how stupid of me."

And it is stupid of her. There are better solutions and all you "..but she has three kids" excusers are crazy.

[Anonymous]

I know my take on this is obviously different, but it's my huge pet peeve when people leave on a running car especially around schools, and places where children congregate. I would be more inclined to say something about that, since the kids are walking to/fro the studio through a bubble of emissions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:how can you lock a runnin car? does she owe a 1990 Honda civic?

how could she owe somebody a honda civic? did she lose a bet?

are you mentally challenged? obviously i meant own. fuck YOU and autocorrect.

ha. that pissed you off, didn't it?

[Anonymous]

Why on earth isn't the mom sitting in her car with the babies, reading a magazine or something, while the older child is at dance class supervised by an adult?

That's what I would do.

However, if the police were called and they didn't make it seem like a big deal, I don't know what else you can do. When she came back and everyone was saying, "Oh how crazy that is that the police were called" you certainly could have let her know you did not think what she was doing was safe. It seems reasonably safe to me, to be honest. If the kids are within her line of sight. Still if I were her I'd stay with the kids in the car.

[Anonymous]

Okay. I have thought it over. I think the environmental concerns of leaving a car running for 45 minutes are worse than the rest.

A monitor plus a visual? Not worth calling the police over and ruining people's lives.

This is not the brightest decision, but it is also not terribly dangerous, in spite of the hysterical what ifs presented in this thread.

Think it over--ruining this woman's and her children's lives (potentially) because you don't agree with her choice?

I beg you to think of the less obvious risks you take everyday but are more likely to result in bad consequences. Sure, it may be legal to turn a 1 year old forward facing or feed them junk every day, but both have more statistically probable bad outcomes than this action.

Would you want someone disrupting your life over those choices?

[Anonymous]

I thought that leaving a child unattended in a car was illegal, but I looked up the law and I'm wrong (at least in MD, DC, and VA). You can call and make a report if/when you feel that a child is in danger in that situation.

Interestingly, though, in Maryland it is illegal to leave a pet unattended in a car. At all.

[Anonymous]

It is wrong. The dance studio should tell her she needs to bring them in, find alternate childcare or pull her child out of class. If it continues, they should contact the police.

I don't think it is right for all of the moms to back her up and say it is okay. You all don't feel that way and it would be better to be honest and polite about it vs. lying to her face and calling the police.

BUT I do think the dance studio has some ownership in the problem since it is their business and she is their client.

[Anonymous]

I think it's a bad idea - carbon monoxide was my first thought, too.
I would stay in the car and read.

[Anonymous]

I'm the OP and I just wanted to point out again that I didn't call the cops, and neither of us called CPS. My friend called the cops and I did not know about it. I was surprised to hear that she'd done that, but honestly a little relieved because I thought surely she would stop leaving the kids in the car once the police gave her a ticket or warned her.

Her life was not at all ruined, nor do I think it should be. I just think she should stop leaving her kids in the car unattended for so long in a public place. I did not approach her personally because I was uncomfortable doing so...I am non confrontational and I didn't think it'd make any difference anyway. What I did was say something to the owner of the studio, because I thought they may even face liability of some sort if something happened (though I am not a lawyer and didn't say anything to that effect to the owner). Nor do I know what kind of liability the studio would or wouldn't face in the event of an injury so please lawyers don't jump down my throat. I think what she is doing is unsafe but now that I've notified the studio owner and the police have come I'm finished worrying about it. If something happens to the kids...well...nothing I could have done about it.